Too many puzzles make us forget that we are dying.

Taking care of dying people can make us realize sadly that not only they will die, but also we will die.

When we know that we are mutually assured destruction with all sentient beings, we will feel a sense of vulnerability that is almost heartbreaking, and we will feel that every moment and every creature is so precious.

First of all, hospice care

In our lifetime, we can be lucky enough to meet Buddhism, embark on the road of chanting Buddhism, and no longer worry about a major event in the afterlife. Only in this way can the journey of life be truly meaningful. But there are too many people, such as our parents, brothers, relatives and friends, neighbors and so on. I have never had a chance to meet a Buddhist person in my life. Even if they are connected, it is hard to believe that the first stage of life is wasted. For them, we can use our love to convey the great kindness of the Buddha at the special moment when they are dying, so that they can also develop with confidence and go to the paradise.

Although we will be strangers, let's try to understand spiritual knowledge and provide the greatest help to dying people.

1, this life ends

At the end of life, we have to experience the pain of "four major separations" physically. The whole body is oppressed by heavy objects, the consciousness is dark, the limbs twitch, the body is hot and cold, the whole body is panting, the saliva is dry, exhausted, the face disappears, the eyes can't see, the ears can't smell, and the mouth can't speak, just like a thousand swords.

Psychologically speaking, dying people must go through complicated conscious activities. The first is "panoramic review": "all the good and evil in one's life are suddenly presented", and everything in life emerges one by one. Moreover, he can not only see the details of events in his life, but also see the consequences of his actions and realize all the feelings he has brought to others. When dying people see their life history repeating itself, they will encounter similar questions: "What have you done in this life? What have you done for others? " All these highlight the fact that death is a moment of face-to-face contact with yourself. When you die, you can't escape from your true face.

At this moment, all sentient beings who are good at doing good deeds recall their previous joyful deeds and fall into happy memories. Endless suffering forced them to die peacefully; All beings who do evil are ashamed of many things they have experienced and feel as if they didn't do it themselves. They are angry and afraid, and are persecuted by all kinds of hardships, just like being born out of a shell. They feel the collapse of heaven and earth, see fantasies and hear strange voices.

2. Hospice care

What life can leave to the dying is deep fear: fear leaves the loved one, fear dignity disappears, fear depends on others, fear is meaningless in this life, fear is out of control because of more and more pain, and the biggest fear is fear itself. The more you run away, the stronger it becomes.

The dying man is losing everything: his family, his property, his body and his heart. All the losses we may experience in life come together when death comes, so how can dying people not be sad, painful and angry? Therefore, we should reassure him that no matter how he feels, no matter how frustrated and disappointed he is, this is normal.

We can put ourselves directly in the position of the dying. Imagine ourselves lying in bed, facing death, pain and loneliness, and then ask ourselves: what do we need most? What do you want our immediate family and friends to give us? We will find that what the dying want is exactly what we want: to be truly loved and accepted.

Dying people expect to be treated as normal people rather than patients. Just touching his hand, looking into his eyes, gently massaging him, or breathing in sync with him can give him great comfort.

Charity in England cleverly told the dying man that he was approaching death. The dying man intuitively knows that his time is running out, but he still relies on others to tell him. If his family doesn't tell him, he may think it's because his family can't face the news, and then he won't bring up the topic. This dishonesty will only make him feel more lonely and anxious.

It is very important to let the dying person say what he really wants to say and warmly encourage him to express his thoughts on dying and death as freely as possible. This frank and unflinching emotional expression can make the dying people change their mood smoothly, accept life and face death well.

People who are dying are often anxious about some unfinished things and can't let go of what they have done in the past. If we can't help him deal with his unfinished troubles, he can't let go completely, and he will cling to life and be afraid of death.

First of all, relatives and friends must learn to let go and learn to let go of dying people. If we cling to the dying person, it will bring him a lot of unnecessary headaches and make it difficult for him to die peacefully. The dying man must hear two clear verbal assurances from the person he loves: first, allow him to die. Second, after his death, his relatives will live well, so don't worry. We sat by our lover's bed and told him in a gentle voice, "You are going to die. Death is normal. We hope you can stay, but we don't want you to suffer any more. We will cherish our days together. Now please stop clinging to life and let go. We sincerely allow you to die. "

Some families refuse to let their loved ones leave, thinking that it is love for their loved ones. Suppose we are relatives on the edge of life. Imagine that we are standing on the deck of a cruise ship about to set sail. All our relatives and friends waved goodbye on the shore. The ship has left the shore, so we have no choice but to leave. At this moment, how do we want our relatives and friends to say goodbye to us?

Try your best to help the dying get rid of all the property, friends and relatives, let him make it clear how to distribute the property, arrange everything clearly, and let him really let go.

The last thought of a dying person will have a decisive influence on the future. At the moment of death, the heart is completely undefended and easily dominated by emotions, and the final thoughts or emotions will be extremely amplified and drown out the whole cognition. At the juncture of all kinds of sufferings, people without religious beliefs will inevitably panic and suffer, producing evil thoughts such as terror, anxiety, lust and trouble, which will turn into evil.

So the surrounding environment is very important, and it must be quiet and harmonious. If possible, let the dying die at home, because home is the most comfortable place for people. Hang the Buddha statue where the dying man can see it, so that he can see it in his eyes and have it in his heart. If you are in the hospital, there are many ways to help: bring a Buddha statue, put a bunch of flowers, turn on the Buddha chanting machine and create a warm atmosphere.

Relatives and friends should mention positive emotions and sacred feelings, such as love, sympathy and respect, and try to let go of climbing, desire and persistence. Pain and sadness will destroy the calm atmosphere and make the dying lose their inner peace at the moment of death. Keep nature, keep our normal appearance, communicate with him simply and equally, and let him feel that we really care about him and accept him. Remind the dying person that he has done a lot of good things in his life, making him feel that life is constructive and happy, and the focus is on his virtue.

It's hard for us to hold back our grief and not cry when watching our loved ones die. Therefore, relatives and friends should deal with their persistence and sadness in advance: cry together, express their love for the dying, say goodbye, and complete this process before the time of death really comes.

Don't show too much sadness at the moment when the dying person dies, because the consciousness of the dying person is particularly fragile at that moment, and the sobbing of relatives and friends at the bedside of the dying person is like thunder and hail to him.

Step 3 help the mind

The person in front of us is experiencing terrible pain, and we can hardly help. We don't know what to do. At this time, we should open our hearts to the dying person, have compassion for his pain, summon the sacred power of Amitabha for him, and say "there is no Amitabha in the south".

Amitabha will appear above the dying person with compassion, stare at him with love, bless him with light, and purify his past sins and present pains.

Learn from Amitabha's boundless will, and learn the purity and solemnity of the western world in the dying person's ear, so that he can have a sincere letter to die in the west, telling him: "Mother-in-law's world is like a fire room, and there is nothing to miss. If you read the name of Amitabha, you would like to live in the pure land of the Western Heaven. When you die, Amitabha will appear in front of you, holding a lotus stand to welcome you to the west. Even if you made a big mistake before, don't take it to heart. Amitabha will not give up any sentient beings. As long as you concentrate on Buddhism, you can decide to go to the western paradise. "

A group of friends and relatives will be organized to help dying people so that they can study with them. If it is difficult to mention the six-character or four-character holy name, you can read the word "Buddha" with you. If you can't even say the word "Buddha", then you know that you have a Buddha in your heart. As the saying goes, "death can't be mindfulness, but knowing that there is a Buddha in business, people will eventually die." )

Let the dying man die peacefully, don't let his body be disturbed after death, keep his heart quiet and continue to help him to the last moment (eight hours after his death).

Under normal circumstances, the dying people often can't understand the compassion of Amitabha, for fear that they don't have enough kung fu to recite Buddha and can't grasp themselves. Amitabha remembered his upside-down suffering, showed great mercy and lowered his hand to take the lead. The dying man sees the Buddha's appearance, is illuminated by the Buddha's light, and is physically and mentally stable. If he is meditating, he sees himself sitting on the golden lotus and being born in Qibaochi. Amitabha cares for all beings at his deathbed, which can be described as compassionate and considerate.

Most people die in a coma, but they are still keenly aware of things around them. Therefore, it is very important to talk to unconscious people constantly and actively. First clearly express your concern for him, praise his good behavior, and then help him think.

Second, help the dead.

Due to the lack of understanding of life, we will think that we can no longer provide any help to the dead. This belief can only deepen our pain and loneliness. In fact, there is no difference between life and death, and the power and warmth of compassion can extend to any realm.

1, vulva

About eight hours after the death of the dying man, his body completely cooled down, knowledge escaped from his body, and he was freed. But the light he saw gradually disappeared and his mind became dizzy. For three and a half days, he suddenly woke up for a moment, not knowing that he was dead, calling the names of his family and seeking their help. Or you can find your family. For example, when you talk to your family in your dream, but you see them turn a blind eye, you still can't get their attention despite your best efforts, and you feel very sad, angry and depressed, "like a fish suffering in hot sand." When I found that I had no figure, no reflection in the mirror and no footprints on the ground, I finally realized that I had passed away. The shock of admitting that he was dead was enough to make him faint.

After three and a half days, God's knowledge and habits formed a figure similar to his previous life. Because it is in the middle state from death to metempsychosis, it is called bardo.

The body shape is the same as before, the body is perfect (even if it was incomplete before), the height is like a child, it feeds on smell, and the four details are invisible to the naked eye.

Through the transformation of consciousness, we can know what others are doing and thinking, and have the special ability to know the past, recall and understand things. Previous students' experiences can be vividly presented at this time. The clitoris has sensitive ears. Although she lingers far away, she will come as soon as she hears the call. The bardo has incredible spiritual abilities. It can see what the naked eye can't see and where it should go from a distance. It can go back and forth in space at will, without shadow, go wherever it wants, go wherever it wants, miss it, and cross walls and mountains.

There are two psychological tendencies in bardo: one is erratic, lonely and painful. Second, "fall in love with lust." It does not belong to anyone. When karma matures, it will be reincarnated in various ways.

When the yin body was formed, the seeds of habit woke up, and suddenly they felt clear and "as if heaven and earth were separated again", and then they entered the dreamland of "heaven" in July 749. The bardo will repeat all her experiences before her death, relive the details of her life a long time ago, and visit the places she walked again, even including "the place where she only vomited one mouthful phlegm". Every seven days, the bardo is forced to experience the painful experience of death again. Everything is going on quickly, and the bad karma of past lives appears in a very concentrated and chaotic way.

In the realm of Yin Zhongkan, Yin Zhongkan showed a scene of trial in his heart because he could not forgive himself: kindness turned into a white patron saint, restated the good deeds of his past life and defended himself; The evil god who turned nausea into black, counted the evils of past lives and filed a complaint; The mirror of karma provides evidence for the final result of the trial.

In the first seven days, there were two kinds of parallel light, one is bright Buddha light, the other is dim reincarnation light. The certification of the former entered the Buddhist land, and the certification of the latter entered the reincarnation. Usually, the bardo is afraid of the brilliance of wisdom, but the light of reincarnation that is used to inviting makes it feel warm.

When the wind of karma blows, all kinds of terrible lights, visions and sounds will suddenly appear in front of us, and all living beings who were killed before their death will claim their lives (these are the manifestations of karma before their death). The bardo escaped in the terrible darkness, but was blocked by the triple abyss of greed, ignorance and ignorance. The bardo is thirsty and uncomfortable, conquered by fear and looking for shelter everywhere.

At this point, the bardo has completely become a ghost without a master, and its desire for reincarnation is irresistible, but the dark clouds, dense fog, thunder and lightning, showers, fierce fires, evil beasts, mobs and demons coming from all directions make it flee everywhere, leaving it alone, torn in courage and courage. At the same time, the more and more intense light of six paths came to hook up, and the yin body was pulled by its own karma. Which way it should go is to follow the light of another road. It has no choice but to see palaces, markets, battlefields, grottoes, wilderness, iron cities and other places in heaven, people, Asura, animals, hungry ghosts and hell.

The extremely good people live in heaven, and the extremely evil people fall into hell. You don't need to wait for karma, so you don't enter the yin. A confident Buddhist convert, when he died, Amitabha was merciful and blessed, and his heart was full of joy. He died in a moment in the pure land, without the process of Yin.

2. Super recommendation

As mentioned above, the sensitive perception of the bardo makes it particularly easy to accept the help of family members, because without the bondage of the physical body, its heart will become easy to be guided, and as long as good thoughts are directed at it, it will be of great benefit.

The best time to help the dead is within 49 days after birth, especially the first 21 days. In the first three weeks, the deceased had a strong connection with life and was more able to accept the help of his family.

The most effective way to cross is to recite the name "South Amitabha". We pray for the people we love with true love and sincerity. Just as fire can burn and water can quench thirst, Amitabha will appear as long as someone asks.

When the voice of "There is no Amitabha in the South" rings, the great light from Amitabha will spread throughout the body and mind of the deceased, so that he can be thoroughly purified, freed from chaos and pain, give him deep and lasting peace, and welcome him to the western paradise.

Whenever we think of our deceased relatives, whenever his name is mentioned, we will give him our love, and then concentrate on chanting "Amitabha in the south", as we think.

After being triggered by the power of prayer, the god of the dead can clearly feel all our thoughts and ideas, so we can understand the teachings we have revealed to him without obstacles, even different languages can't form obstacles. Therefore, it is very important that the enlightener should not just follow the script, but concentrate on it. At the same time, the deceased lives in practical experience and is more capable of understanding the truth than we are.

Help for the dead is not limited to forty-nine days after death. It's never too late to help the dead. Even if the person we want to help has passed away for a hundred years, it is still beneficial to read Buddhist language for him.