So, what does human happiness depend on?
The following is an article I read on the Internet:
1April, 988, Howard Dickinson was 24 years old. He was a doctor of philosophy at Columbia University. The title of his graduation thesis is "What does human happiness depend on". In order to accomplish this task, he randomly distributed 1 10,000 questionnaires to the citizens. In the questionnaire, there are detailed personal data registration and five options:
One is very happy;
B happiness;
C general;
D pain;
E is very painful
After more than two months, he finally recovered more than 5,200 valid questionnaires. According to statistics, only 12 1 people think they are very happy.
Then Howard Dickinson made a detailed investigation and analysis of this 12 1 person. He found that 50 people in 12 1 are successful people in this city, and their happiness mainly comes from the success of their careers. The other 7 1 people are ordinary housewives, some are farmers selling vegetables, some are small employees in the company, and some are even homeless people receiving relief funds. Why are these people with poor careers so happy? Through many contacts and exchanges with these people, Howard Dickinson found that although these people have diverse occupations and different personalities, they have one thing in common. Is that they don't have too many material requirements. They are insipid, comfortable and happy, and can enjoy the ordinary life of daily necessities.
Howard Dickinson was inspired by these findings. So he came to the conclusion of this paper: there are two kinds of people in this world who are the happiest. One is an ordinary person who is indifferent and quiet, and the other is an outstanding person who has made great achievements. If you are an ordinary person, you can get happiness by cultivating your mind and reducing your desires. If you are an outstanding person, you can succeed in your career through enterprising and hard work, and then get a higher level of happiness.
The tutor read his paper and appreciated it very much, giving him a great "Excellence"!
It's not over yet.
After graduation, Edward Dickinson stayed on as a teacher. In a flash, more than twenty years have passed. Today, Edward Dickinson has grown from a passionate young man to a famous tenured professor in the United States. In June 2009, by chance, he turned over the graduation thesis of that year. He's curious. What about 12 1 people who think they are "very happy"? Are they as happy as they were then?
He found out the contact information of 12 1 person, and it took him three months to conduct a questionnaire survey on them again.
Feedback from the survey results came back. When 7 1 ordinary people, except for two deaths, * * * withdrew 69 questionnaires. Over the years, the lives of these 69 people have changed a lot (some of them have already become successful people; Some have been living an ordinary life; Some people become poor because of diseases and accidents. ), but their options have not changed and they still feel "very happy". However, the choice of 50 winners has changed dramatically. Only nine people have a smooth career and still insist on the choice of the year-very happy. 23 people chose "average". 16 people choose "pain" because of frustration, bankruptcy or demotion. Two others chose "very painful".
Looking at the results of this survey, Howard Dickinson fell into deep thought. For several days, Howard Dickinson was immersed in his own thinking.
Two weeks later, Howard Dickinson published a paper on life code in Washington post. In the paper, Howard Dickinson described the process and results of these two questionnaires in detail. At the end of the paper, he concluded that all happiness supported by material can not last long, and will leave with the departure of material. Only the peace and tranquility of mind, and then the pleasure of body and mind, is the real source of happiness.
After reading this paper, countless readers exclaimed: "Howard Dickinson cracked the password of happiness!" " "This article has aroused widespread concern. Washington Post printed it six times a day!
Howard Dickinson looked guilty when interviewed by the media: More than 20 years ago, I was too young to understand the true meaning of "happiness". Moreover, I also conveyed this incorrect view of happiness to many of my students. Here, I sincerely apologize to my students and to "happiness"!
Frankly speaking, the basic idea for parents and teachers to urge their children to get good grades is: good grades-good universities-good jobs-good treatment. In short, mainly from the material point of view to live a happy life.
One of the reasons why parents and teachers insist on this concept for a long time is that they have not deeply explored the connotation of happiness.
If material poverty is not enough to support the existence of life, then material satisfaction will bring great happiness. The research described in the above article shows that if the material is basically satisfied, if happiness is still supported by material and there is no perfect spiritual quality, once the material is reduced, it will be unfortunate.
And we know that in the fierce competition for exams, there are always a few people who can get ahead. Therefore, the idea of living a happy life through examination results is at least a narrow road, although it is not completely infeasible. Since we find that many people in life are still very happy even if they don't have a high diploma and status, even if they don't make great material achievements, why don't we adopt more flexible ideas to help children live a happy life, and why do we have to force them to take a road with a low success rate?
Then, what conditions can ordinary people feel happy without "getting ahead"?
The Journal of Family Business (20 18, 12) published an article by distinguished professor Toshi Utsumi Goto of the Japanese University of Economics. Goto Toshi Utsumi introduced a global survey conducted by Gallup Consulting since 1950s.
This survey took more than 50 years, and the results show that there are five factors that determine human happiness, and these five factors are applicable to any country.
Moreover, to be happy, all five elements need to succeed, at least not fail. If only one factor succeeds and the others are ignored, it will be difficult to feel happy every day. Let me tell you these five elements.
First, full of enthusiasm for work.
The work mentioned here is not only the kind of work that can earn income, but also includes public welfare activities such as volunteers. What matters is whether a person is passionate about what he puts a lot of energy into. Happiness brought by work is the most important of the five elements. People with high job happiness are more likely to think that they are doing well than those without such happiness.
Second, establish good interpersonal relationships.
People with happy interpersonal relationships spend an average of six hours a day on interpersonal relationships. In other words, as long as you spend more time communicating with others, you can improve the overall quality of life. In addition, having close friends is also an effective way to improve the happiness of interpersonal relationships.
Third, economic stability.
The economic stability here is not necessarily particularly rich. People who can control their debts within the repayment range and gradually increase their savings will have a high sense of economic security and happiness. People with high economic happiness spend money wisely. These people prefer all kinds of experiential consumption to material consumption. And they spend money not only for themselves, but also to make others happy.
Fourth, physical and mental health, full of vitality.
A healthy diet, regular exercise and sleep are very important. In terms of exercise, if you only do 20 minutes of exercise every day, you will feel better all day. People who exercise more than 2 days a week will have less stress than those who don't exercise. People who have exercise habits will also become more confident.
Fifth, contribute to the community.
People with high sense of community happiness are generally proud of their community, and conversely, they will make more contributions to the community. This kind of dedication to others will also improve one's happiness. After contributing to the community, the results will be easily experienced and people's happiness will be increased.
The above five lines, you don't have to get ahead.
Even if our children's academic performance is not particularly ideal, they can still live happily, as long as we have to force them to "get ahead" in their studies.
It should be said that "getting ahead" in learning only adds some possibilities to the countless possibilities leading to happiness. Therefore, on the road to happiness, children are almost at the same starting line.
When we get rid of the narrow practice of "forcing children to study" and realize that there are many possibilities to make children happy, we will treat their exam results with a more peaceful attitude, help them discover their talents and help them to be unique and develop their specialties in life. Doing so will make children happier.