The most uncomfortable thing for Phillips is the problem of sleep. It became very difficult to fall asleep, but he couldn't wake up in the morning.
Ms. Fan thinks that her daughter is just too tired to study, so it will be fine to rest for two days.
As a result, Phillips didn't go to school for a week in a row, lying in bed all day, unable to do anything. She is a walking corpse, and Ms. Fan is anxious. This has never happened to her. She wanted to take Phillips to the hospital. Phillips said she didn't want to see anyone, and said nothing.
Ms. Fan looked it up on the Internet, which is very similar to depression. Ms. Fan heard that treating depression requires taking medicine. She felt that taking medicine would affect the body, especially stimulating the brain, and did not take the initiative to take the children to the hospital. She made an appointment with a counselor online and reluctantly agreed to have a chat with the counselor.
After several consultations, the consultant learned a lot about Phillips' growing experience.
Phillips' mother is a sensitive, irritable and competitive woman.
Sensitive: an unintentional remark from a colleague in the unit made her angry for several days; Her mother-in-law's behavior and words bored her to the extreme; A joke from my husband can explain several meanings.
Anxiety: Phillips gets angry when he gets up late; Being reprimanded for being a little slow in doing homework; Not going to bed on time is even more impatient.
Strong: I always hope that I am better than others, that my daughter is better than others' children, and that my husband is more capable.
Phillips said, let me talk about two sentences that I often say have the greatest influence on me.
The first sentence: If you can do it, why not do it?
"You can control yourself by watching your mobile phone. Why do you keep watching? "
"You can go to bed early. Why do you sleep so late? "
"Why didn't you finish your homework today? You can finish it. "
To sum up these words, the core is three words: dissatisfied!
Phillips cried and said, no matter what I do, my mother is not satisfied. I hardly heard her say anything that satisfied me. Am I really that bad?
Many parents who are busy with work and life are very similar to Ms. Fan. They forgot a very important thing, that is, a smile.
Mom's smile is the sun at home. Without sunlight, any plant can hardly grow healthily.
I find that children with depression tend to look pale. Is there a lack of sunshine?
The second sentence: Don't trust your daughter.
Ms. Fan devoted almost all her energy to the care and supervision of her daughter. Phillips and his classmates went out to play, and Ms. Fan urged them. Even though Philips 18 years old, these cars still have to be said several times.
When her daughter is at home, Ms. Fan will make several phone calls in an afternoon and ask her what she is doing in an indirect way.
Ms. Fan had to personally confirm her daughter's daily routine. She never thought her daughter was capable of taking care of herself.
Being taken care of is very comfortable, which makes her daughter lack the ability to stand on her own feet; Not being trusted, let her deny herself in her bones.
The core of depression is self-denial and lack of sense of value.
Children nowadays seem to be very delicate and difficult to raise. Children used to be free-range, so it's okay.
Parents with big hearts can give their children more room to grow up than parents who attach too much importance to their children. Having more than two children will distract parents' pressure.