For people with a certain sense of inferiority, inferiority is the biggest stumbling block in life.
People can't be excellent in all aspects, and there will always be some defects, even great men: Napoleon was short, Lincoln was ugly, and Roosevelt was polio. These are congenital defects that can be changed through acquired efforts, which are nothing more than academic qualifications, skills, knowledge, culture, personality and so on. Aren't these unchangeable defects enough to be the source of painful inferiority complex? But what they have is an extremely brilliant and confident life!
The first element of self-confidence is: properly positioning, fostering strengths and avoiding weaknesses, and trusting that since God has given talents, let them find jobs! . This contains two basic messages: first, face up to your shortcomings, don't feel inferior because of differences, don't worry about defects, and don't let weaknesses affect your success; Secondly, and most importantly, we should grasp and believe our own specialties, foster strengths and avoid weaknesses, and form advantages, so as to carry out life planning and life competition.
The ancients said: "Mei Xuxun's snow is white, and a piece of plum fragrance is lost in the snow."
The most basic way for us not to be entangled in shortcomings is not to use our own weaknesses to compete with the advantages of others. There is no need to make things difficult for yourself, and there is no need to worry and feel inferior about it. If you like playing basketball, but you are not tall enough, don't blame yourself. Although you have no height advantage, you are short and have a low center of gravity. After practicing the ball control skills, those tall players will have a headache Bo Akins is only 165CM, but he still stands in the NBA. Sometimes all we need is to change, and then tell ourselves: forget those defects, it's not your reason, your goal, your path, or it doesn't matter to you.
Know yourself well and position yourself well. Everyone has his own characteristics and specialties. Even if your strengths are not top-notch and authoritative, you will always have something better than your competitors. As long as you are good at using it, you can form an advantage.
I mentioned in an invited university speech that self-confidence is very important in career breakthrough. After the speech, a classmate asked me: "I am a fresh graduate, facing the problems that most fresh graduates have: the professional experience value is almost zero, and there is no particularly outstanding professional advantage." Every time I apply, I worry that I won't be hired. I don't know how to increase my confidence. "
I understand his inner distress, but fresh graduates certainly can't have rich work experience and performance like the old people in the workplace. So I suggested to him: "You are a very rational person, so you know that your lack of confidence is due to your resume and personal workplace persuasion. In fact, these confidence problems can be solved by positioning:
First, don't aim too high, don't concentrate on applying for positions that really need work experience, because we know we need a growth period;
Second, you can make a resume with advantages and disadvantages. Your lack of professional experience can prove that you are competent for this job. Without work performance, you can prove that you have the professional ability to engage in this industry, such as technical patents of engineering students and works and articles of liberal arts students. Do this positioning well, persuasiveness and competitiveness will come out, and self-confidence will follow. "
Third, you can consciously do some work that you are good at first, make achievements, make achievements, and explain to your future favorite company that you have the potential to do anything or do a good job. As long as you are given a chance, you can surprise the company.
Fourth, you need to do a good job in the positioning of life stages. You need several three-year plans or five-year plans. To reach the peak of your life, you must find your own position at each stage. College graduation requires college graduation, and people need middle-aged positioning when they reach middle age. For example, if you want to be a senior vice president of a company, you should plan to spend three years as an assistant manager or manager, three years as a senior supervisor or vice president, three years as a senior vice president or president, and even start your own business.
Another function of correct positioning is to make your self-confidence a belief.
Confidence and belief are completely different concepts, which can be seen from the literal consciousness: confidence lies in "heart"-psychological state and psychological feeling; Faith focuses on "thinking"-ideas and beliefs, and confidence is promoted to faith, which is the only way to make confidence last. As the ancient Roman poet Ovid said, "Faith! People with faith can withstand any wind and waves. "
Thomas Carlyle once famously said, "Whether people have faith or not does not depend on shackles or any other external pressure." Faith and belief can only be produced by positioning and planning one's own life, finding the coordinate axis of one's own life, and making one's own bole by positioning one's strengths and avoiding weaknesses, so as to have real self-confidence.