Online test: Can you adapt to long-distance relationships /question.php? id=5 102

With the rapid development of modern science and technology, geographical distance is no longer an insurmountable obstacle between people. Not to mention the speed of the plane and the high speed of the train, a large number of online contact methods in the network age alone are enough to bring a lot of comfort to the geographical distance. As a result, urban white-collar workers advocate "love without borders" more, many people talk about long-distance love, and more and more urban white-collar workers join the ranks. Long-distance love is romantic and sounds interesting. The so-called distance produces beauty, but it is not easy to "play well" long-distance love. First of all, you need to have a very good psychological quality. You also need skills and financial resources such as "timely comfort", "economic support" and "sudden attack". Otherwise, you will lose your wife and your soldiers.

If "long-distance love" is compared to a game, the game has its own rules, and professionals comment on the raiders-the six main points of the game:

1, enough endurance and brains.

2. Sufficient psychological endurance.

Enough money to pay for the expensive transportation.

4. An open-minded spirit.

5. Enough courage and wisdom.

6. A fashionable concept of marriage.

One of the rules of the game: the love formula of mind+endurance

Bai Run: 29-year-old, scientific and technical personnel of Guangzhou Water Resources Survey Institute.

Li Jing, aged 27, is the manager of Guangzhou Representative Office of Shenzhen Wei Lan Company.

Capable Li Jing and her boyfriend Belem were assigned to work in a research institute in Guangzhou when they graduated from university. By chance, Li Jing was hired by a high-tech company in Shenzhen and decided to work in Shenzhen. Bairun believes that as long as Jing Li likes it, it can develop and has no objection.

On the day of separation, the two kept in constant contact by phone and email every day, but they were more enthusiastic than when they were in the same city. Especially on special days, Bairun will mail some roses, greeting cards and some trinkets to Li Jing. Needless to say, romance and warmth are envied by many people.

There are a lot of talents working in high-tech parks in Li Jing. Many graduate students and international students work with her. In addition, Li Jing's beauty and ability soon attracted the admiration of a graduate student from Beijing. He often helps Li Jing solve some work problems, which makes Li Jing have a good impression on him.

Because of the busy work, Li Jing began to call Bairun less and less, and sometimes even Bairun didn't have time to answer the phone. Smart Bairun began to realize something, but he never blamed Jing Li. After all, a little contradiction can cause a lot of troubles and misunderstandings. At this time, mutual trust is particularly important. Bairun has confidence in their relationship, but it still needs hard work to trust. Bairun knows that the romance and crisis of long-distance love coexist, and a little carelessness may lead to all the previous achievements being wasted.

Bairun began to take the initiative to run to Shenzhen every week, and every time he appeared in front of Li Jing, he would bring a small gift to surprise Li Jing. Besides, Bairun sends an email to Li Jing every day, which is neither long nor short, but it always makes Li Jing deeply moved by Bairun's affection.

Bairun never checked Li Jing's whereabouts, giving her freedom and tolerance to the maximum extent, while Li Jing saw Bairun trusted her so much and took the initiative to tell her about herself. She knew that her affection for graduate students could not replace the feelings accumulated between her and Belem.

Bairun's "trust tactics" and efforts finally paid off. One year later, on Christmas Eve, Li Jing excitedly told Bairun that the company would set up an office in Guangzhou, and she volunteered to transfer back to Guangzhou to work. After all, people who love each other are separated. Although romantic, they are still too tired.

Game tip:

People who separate the two places are most afraid of the strangeness caused by the separation of time and distance. Writing more letters and communicating regularly are the most direct ways to keep emotional temperature.

Not suitable for people:

A person who lacks romantic literary talent and can't persevere. (Not suitable for other carsick people)

The second rule of the game: financial support

Hu Bin, 30, is a tour guide of Hangzhou Guowei International Travel Service.

Wu Jing, 23, is at the front desk of Xi 'an Kaixuan Hotel.

It is not easy for an international tour guide like Hu Bin to have a serious relationship. Hu Bin works as a tour guide in an international travel agency in Hangzhou and often travels to western European countries, while his infatuated girlfriend Wu Jing works in a five-star hotel in An. Long-distance love needs to pay too much, and Jason Wu dare not give in easily, but this Hu Bin flower and gentle shell offensive will eventually make the beauty move.

Because Jason Wu doesn't have much free time at work, Hu Bin often comes to Xi 'an to see her. Their long-distance love can really be compared with novels. Needless to say, Hu Bin has not only contributed to the telecommunications industry, but even Northwest Civil Aviation will give him an "honorary passenger".

Hu Bin usually has three to five days' holiday after leaving the group for half a month. Most of the time, he will fly from Hangzhou to Xi 'an to meet Jason Wu. These three or five days are really "flying fast" for lovers in love. Not to mention the suffering of lovesickness, the cost of Hu Bin's return is even more nerve-racking, with a trip back and forth of nearly two thousand. Although Hu Bin's income is quite rich, such expenses are not a long-term solution.

Jason Wu hoped that Hu Bin would simply come to Xi 'an for development, but Hu Bin didn't want to give up his present career, so they quarreled several times. Hu Bin said that he could not give up his successful career in Hangzhou at once, but he would not give up his love affair with Jason Wu easily. In order to satisfy both sides, Hu Bin decided to run for another year and a half, only paying more for the trip. But this kind of love journey is really beyond the ability of ordinary people.

The trick of the game: I can't let go of my career and love, so I can only balance it with money. Therefore, long-distance love not only needs enough courage to endure the suffering of lovesickness, but also needs money as the backing. By the way, the biggest beneficiary is probably the telecommunications and transportation departments. Without the silent dedication of these couples, how could telecommunications and transportation flourish? )

The third rule of the game: "narrow-minded" is the mother of failure

Jiang Feng, 25, is a programmer in Shenzhen Youlian Technology Company.

Ping Li, 26, is an accountant in Shanghai Michelle Company.

Li Ping graduated one year earlier than Jiang Feng and went to work in a foreign company in Shanghai. Originally, Jiang Feng had planned to go to Shanghai for development after graduation. I didn't expect a high-tech company in Shenzhen to take a fancy to Jiang Feng who studied packaging processing. Jiang Feng, who is very enterprising, decided to focus on his career and came to Shenzhen.

They thought it was simple. Li Ping wants to see the development of Jiangfeng. If her work improves, she will come to Shenzhen. If Jiang Feng doesn't develop smoothly, she will let him come to Shanghai. So it's no big deal to be apart for a while. But there are so many uncertainties in long-distance love that no one can say what will happen tomorrow.

Jiang Feng is an active person. He made some good friends soon after he came to Shenzhen. When they are free, several men and women often drink and talk about young people's dreams. Unexpectedly, when Jiang Feng was busy in the kitchen, Ping Li's phone happened to be answered by a girl, which led to a modest dispute between them.

After a few days of stalemate, Jiang Feng finally passed the test and grinded out his explanation. Less than a month after the incident subsided, the two men had another big fight. One night, Jiang Feng went to a friend's house for a drink. When Ping Li called, she was not happy to hear a girl's voice. Jiang Feng said there were a group of friends at the party. Ping Li still asked questions with a grain of salt. Jiang Feng was bored, so he hung up the phone and turned it off. Don't want to the next day, Ping Li called Jiang Feng's office and asked him why he didn't go back to the dormitory last night. Jiang Feng also rightfully drank too much and slept at a friend's house. Ping Li didn't believe it and forced Jiang Feng to explain it clearly. Jiang Feng knew that Ping Li was a sensitive and suspicious little woman. She didn't do anything wrong to her, so she hung up the phone.

In this way, the contradiction was provoked, because the distance between the two places could not be solved in time, the bad feelings between the two people became deeper and deeper, and the quarrels on the phone became more and more frequent. What Jiang Feng didn't expect was that Ping Li's interference and bullying had begun to make him gradually disappointed with this relationship. One afternoon, after another telephone quarrel, Jiang Feng was completely disheartened. He decided to give up this relationship that took more than two years but has lost its luster.

Game tip:

He who knows how to put away freely is a wise man.

Not suitable for people:

An overly sensitive and suspicious person. Men with quick temper and strong personality should not get involved.

Rule 4 of the game: at the water's edge, relax.

Sun Shuang, aged 26, is an engineer of Nanjing Architectural Design Institute.

Yu Qiong, 26, is a teacher in the Foreign Languages Department of Wuhan University of Science and Technology.

Sun Shuang, who is engaged in architectural design, is the most free and easy in long-distance love. Currently working in an architectural design institute in Nanjing, and his girlfriend Yu Qiong, who has been in love for more than three years, teaches at a university in Wuhan. Their relationship has been very stable, and there is no idea of changing the status quo at present.

Yu Qiong is a teacher who teaches English. She has a wide range of hobbies, accepts new ideas and new things, and advocates relaxed and comfortable relationships. Although she is 26 years old this year, she never mentioned her marriage with Sun Shuang. She thinks it is good for them to be apart now, so that they can concentrate on developing their own career and enjoy a free life at the same time. Talk once a month or two. There are endless words. Sun Shuang is also a man who likes freedom. He usually goes to some classes to recharge after work, and will ask some friends out to play tennis and go fishing on weekends. He said that if his girlfriend was around, how could he be so free?

Sun Shuang and Yu Qiong didn't agree on a time to meet, and didn't ask each other to call every day or any other restrictions. Everything goes with the flow. When they miss each other, they make several phone calls every day. I didn't contact each other for about a week when I was busy, and I didn't care too much about each other. Sun Shuang thinks this is very good. Although it is not easy to meet in two places, we can miss each other and often write love letters to make the feeling of love stronger.

Because there are not too many constraints and requirements between them, and there are no contradictions at ordinary times, the relationship between them has always been very harmonious.

At present, they are satisfied with the status quo and have not considered the future for the time being. They believe that modern people's concept of marriage should be more free and casual, everyone is an independent body, and how to make individuals live a fuller and happier life is very important.

Game tip:

Don't take marriage too seriously The key is to keep the dual mentality of being single and in love, and make personal life more relaxed and happy. Although they fall in love in different places, they have their own wonderful things.

Not suitable for people:

A small jasper who is too dependent, or a man who is too affectionate and possessive

On October 23rd, 65438 10, LES from Haikou sent me a short message saying: hello, Dora, I have been with a girl from Wuhan for more than a year. She went back to her hometown this year, and I waited for her for half a year. But recently she broke up with her on the grounds that I often quarreled with her. I am in pain. We were never embarrassed when we were together before, and our feelings were very good. Why did the problem continue after we separated?

On February 7, Alian of Qionghai asked blankly in a text message: I met him through the Internet. He is in the mainland and I am in Hainan. Although we have never met, we get along well and feel like soul mates. I feel that I can't live without him more and more, but I feel sad when I think about the future. Dora, do you think the love between the two places can succeed?

Long-distance love, which is intertwined with too many ups and downs and losses. It is more difficult than couples who get along with each other every day, and it is more prone to division, suspicion and severance. You will lose sleep because you can't see each other, and you will always guess that there are other boys and girls around him because of your sensitivity. Because of love, all paranoia has become an unavoidable burden in your life.

Falling into such love adds helplessness and sadness to life. You can't share the same cup of coffee with each other, you can't walk hand in hand by the sea like other couples, and you can't get each other's private space. The only thing that connects feelings is the telephone and the endless network. Love is stored in association, and all emotions can only be vented by QQ words sometimes, and emotions are like floating in the air.

If you love, you want a result, unless you don't love deeply enough. But can love fly across the ocean?

Wind candle 32-year-old network editor

Although distance produces beauty, the barrier between space and time is the biggest obstacle to love after all. The most effective emotional scores can't be achieved by touching the lover, whispering in the ear and intimate contact. If you don't warm up your feelings, take care of them and think about each other, then love is likely to disappear.

But a 23-year-old company employee

I think long-distance love, because of distance, often keeps love in a beautiful state. However, if we are separated for too long, the space for mutual spiritual integration will shrink, especially for girls. If they have sensitive concerns, tell them, and don't let worries and guesses stagnate in their hearts. When you miss him, tell him not to let the distance dilute the concentration of missing. After all, he cares most about your feelings. If you are really embarrassed, you can chat privately on QQ every night.

28-year-old salesman in winter

The love between the two places is most afraid of breaking up. Even if I put down the phone or go offline, I will regret it in less than 30 seconds, and I can't face the other party and admit my mistake. Distance escalates contradictions and makes you really break up. Therefore, the relationship between the two places needs the joint management and care of both sides. Don't push each other too hard. Even if you are angry, pour cold water on yourself to cool down. Share more happiness with each other, be considerate and greet each other, so that the other party will not get tired of this love and expect more sweetness in the future.

Cabbage flower 25-year-old reporter

This kind of love needs to be relaxed and flexible, giving each other enough space. Although the telephone is a communication tool, it can't ring 1 hour, which will not only affect his work, but also make him feel humiliated in front of his colleagues. Don't try to know every minute of him, the most important thing is to ask, where are you and what are you doing? Let him feel that if you are threatened, there is nowhere to hide, and sooner or later he will feel like running away.

All love needs careful management. Long-distance love, although it sounds a little dangerous, is not difficult to find as long as you put aside unrealistic fantasies and inexplicable worries and learn to maintain it sincerely and persistently. In fact, this taste of love is mixed with a little sweetness.