Children's family education may be one of the most difficult things parents face in their lives! Many parents not only hope that their children will be healthy, but also hope that their children will have a successful career and a good personality in the future. Therefore, most of them take the initiative to lay a good life track for their children and let them move in the direction that their parents think is right.
However, children will always rebel. When they grow up, they will gradually find that life is colorful and even find their own way. However, it is not easy to derail a "train (child)" that has been running on the rails for more than ten or even twenty years.
The label of "unfilial" is the unequal parent-child relationship. Once a child is disobedient and rebellious, it is easy to be labeled as "unfilial" and "bad boy" by adults. These labels seem to be just a way of preaching, but behind them are the concepts of "the order of the old and the young" and "the division of classes", which leads to the unequal parent-child relationship between families and is prone to tension.
In this regard, Ang Lee, an internationally renowned Chinese director, thinks that "children are not parents' accessories"! Children's lives should be decided by themselves, so they have a unique concept of parenting centered on "love".
Recommended Reading: An Important Cornerstone for Family Education to Cultivate Children's Good Character
"Filial piety" is an outdated concept! ? It is better to teach children how to love than to teach them "filial piety" 1993. After directing the movie The Wedding Banquet, Ang Lee said in an interview: "Everyone is an independent individual. When we get along with others, we know to respect each other. We should respect and accept each other's hobbies and everything, which is a benchmark for peaceful coexistence. 」
Strangely, most parents in today's society don't think so about their children, but try to manipulate and restrict them in various ways. Parents talk about "doing good things for their children", in fact, they are instilling in their children that they should be obedient, as if children are not human beings and are a whole grade behind adults.
Therefore, Ang Lee believes that the quickest way to make parent-child relationship equal and free is to abandon the concept that children should be "filial" and teach children what is equality, respect and love, so that the relationship between children and parents can be mutual love, respect and equality, and there is no distinction between high and low.
Do children no longer have to be filial to their parents? Actually, Ang Lee didn't mean it! His so-called "filial piety" refers to the tyranny of parents and the suppression of their children's wishes ... because children have the right to choose freely, their ideas are also ideas. If parents can respect and support their children's choices, children can also feel their parents' love.
Recommended reading: the new concept of parent-child love: raising children to prevent old age, just for companionship.
Parents should educate themselves, learn to love and experience the atmosphere of love before raising their children. Don't be a parent who can't "reason" with children or "talk about ethics" with children. The most typical example of parent-child relationship inequality is probably this passage! Parents' words and deeds are teaching materials for children to learn. To give children a good future, parents should not only focus on raising children, but also learn to educate and change themselves.