I've been here. I'm fine. The suicide note of an eight-year-old girl, a helpless father. There is a beautiful little girl. Her name is Yu Yan. She has a pair of big shining eyes and a transparent childlike innocence. She is an orphan. She has only lived in this world for eight years. Her last words in this world were "I've always been here. I'm fine. " She wants to die in autumn. A slim figure is like a flower that blooms and fades naturally. There are yellow flowers everywhere. When the fallen leaves are flying in the air. She will see the geese travel far. She voluntarily gave up treatment. The 540,000 donated by Chinese people around the world became seven. Give life as a cake of hope to seven children who are hovering on the line of life and death. I voluntarily gave up treatment. She didn't know who her real parents were when she was born. She only has one foster father. 1996165438+1October 30th. It was October 20th of the lunar calendar 10. Because "dad" she found a newborn who was about to freeze to death in a small grass next to Shenjiachong in Yongxing Town. I found a little note on her chest. It says "101October 20th afternoon 12". She lives in Group 2, Yunyan Village, Sanxing Town, Shuangliu County, Sichuan Province, and is 30 years old. Because the family is poor. I can't find a date. If you want to adopt this child, I'm afraid nobody wants to marry into this family. Watching the baby cry like a kitten in his arms. She put you down and picked it up several times. Turn around and walk back. This little life has been cold all over. Crying is weak. Nobody cares now, I'm afraid I'll die at any time! Bite your teeth. He picked up the baby again With a sigh "what I eat. Just eat with me! " . She named her child She Yan. Because she was born in the autumn harvest season. The bachelor became a father. No breast milk. I can't afford milk powder. I have to feed rice soup. Therefore, she has been sickly since she was a child. But very smart and sensible. Spring has gone, and it has come back. Like a small flower on a bitter vine. She Yan grows up day by day. Surprisingly clever. Neighbors say the dolls they picked up have high IQ. Everyone likes her very much. Although she was ill since she was a child. In my father's fear. She Yan has grown up. Children with bad karma are really unusual. From the age of five, she knew how to help her father share the housework, wash clothes, cook and mow the grass. She did everything well. She knows that she is different from other children. Children in other families have parents. She and her father are the only ones in her family. This family is supported by her and her father. She needs to get better. Be good. Don't let dad worry a little more. A little angry. Went to primary school. She Yan knows that he should study hard. Make progress. Take the first place in the exam. An illiterate father will have light on his face in the village. She has never let her father down. She sang to her father. Tell dad the same interesting thing that happened at school. Stick the little red flower on the wall carefully. Occasionally, I will beat my father with naughty debut questions. Every time I see the smile on my father's face. She will secretly satisfy that "although she can't have a mother like other children, she is very happy to live happily with her father." It started in May 2005. She often has nosebleeds. One morning, She Yan was washing her face. Suddenly I found a basin of clear water red. At the sight of the blood in the nose, it drips down. No matter what measures are taken, nothing can stop it. There's really no way. Dad took her to the township health center for an injection. But the eye of the needle is bleeding. There are many red spots on her legs. The doctor said to go to the big hospital quickly. Come to Chengdu Hospital. At the peak of consultation. She can't wait in line. Sitting alone on a bench, holding your nose. A nosebleed is like two lines. Go straight down. Dye the floor red. She felt embarrassed. I had to pick up the bedpan to receive blood. Less than 10 minutes. The blood in the basin is half full. The doctor saw it. Take the child to check quickly. After the inspection. The doctor issued a notice of critical illness. She has acute leukemia! The medical expenses for this disease are very expensive. The cost generally needs 300 thousand yuan. She is confused about You Shi. Looking at the daughter in the hospital bed. He can't think too much. He has only one idea. Save your daughter! Borrowing money from relatives and friends is just a drop in the bucket. It's too far from 300 thousand. He decided to sell the only adobe house in the family that can be exchanged for money. But because the house is too shabby. No buyer can be found at present. Looking at his father's melancholy eyes and thin face. Sheyan always has a sour feeling. On one occasion, she held her father's hand. I haven't said it yet. Tears came out: "Dad. I want to die ... "My father looked at her in surprise. "You are only 8 years old. Why die? " "I am a doll. Everyone says my life is cheap. Can't afford to get sick. Let me leave the hospital ... "June 18. Eight-year-old She Yan replaced her illiterate father. He signed "voluntarily giving up the treatment of She Yan" in the medical record book. The 8-year-old girl cleverly arranged the afterlife. When I got home that day, She Yan has never asked her father for anything since she was a child. At this time, I made two demands on my father: she should wear new clothes. Take pictures. She explained to her father, "I'm gone. Look at me in the picture when you miss me! ! ~ "The next day. Dad asked his aunt to take Sheyan to town. Hua 30 yuan bought two sets of new clothes for She Yan. She Yan chose a set of pink short-sleeved shorts for herself. Aunt chose a dress with red spots on a white background for her. She was reluctant to take it off when she tried it on. Three people came to the photo studio. She Yan is wearing a new pink dress. Make a V-shaped gesture with your hand. Try to smile. Finally, I couldn't help crying ... she couldn't go to school anymore. She stood on the path in front of the village for a long time with her schoolbag on her back. Eyes are always moist. If it weren't for a reporter named Yan Fu from Chengdu Evening News. She will be like a leaf slipping quietly. Quietly floated down from the wind. My aunt learned from the hospital. Wrote a story. She Yan's story is described in detail. Soon, the story of "8-year-old girls are clever in arranging descendants" spread in Rongcheng. Chengdu was moved. The internet has been particularly touched. Countless citizens are heartbroken for this poor girl. From Chengdu to the whole country. Even the whole world. The real world and internet space are linked together. All caring people donate money to this weak life, and "harmonious society" has become the strongest in everyone's heart. Exactly 10 days. Global Chinese donations have exceeded 560,000. The cost of the operation is enough. Xiao Sheyan's life was once again ignited by everyone's love! ! ~ after announcing the end of the fund-raising activity. Donations are still received from all over the world. All the money is in place. Doctors do their best. One after another, the treatment difficulties are also overcome as scheduled! Everyone smiles and waits for the day of success … Some netizens wrote "She Yan, my dear child …". On June 2 1 day, she Yan, who gave up treatment and went home to die, was reconnected to Chengdu. I was admitted to the city children's hospital. There is money. Humble life has hope and a reason to live. She Yan received unbearable chemotherapy. Inside the glass door. She Yan is lying in the hospital bed for infusion. There is a chair beside the bed. There is a plastic basin on the chair. From time to time, she throws up sideways. The little girl's strength surprised everyone. Her attending doctor introduced her. Gastrointestinal reaction was strong during chemotherapy. At the beginning of Yan Yan. One spit is half a basin. But she said nothing. I had a bone marrow puncture when I first entered the hospital. The needle pierced the rib. She didn't cry or scream. I didn't cry. Do not move. She was a disgrace from birth to death. Didn't get a trace of maternal love. When Dr. Xu Ming proposed "She Yan". Be my daughter! ~ "Qian Yan eyes flashing. Tears welled up at once. The next day. When Dr. Xu Ming came to her bedside. She Yan shyly called "Mother Xu" all her life and began to be in a daze. Then smile. Sweet replied "good daughter". Dr Xu Ming said to her, "When you get well. Mom takes you to eat KFC ~! ! "She covered her eyes with confusion. She really can't imagine what KFC is. The next day, mother Xu went to the ward. Put a pair of white socks on Sheyan. Casually said to her, "Put this on. It's not cold yet! " She said happily, "Mom. This is the first time I wear socks. " Dr. Xu Ming immediately felt as uncomfortable as a needle. Then he asked her, "Tell mom. What else do you want? " She Yan bowed her head and was shy for a long time. Then he said timidly, "I want a pair of red leather shoes." Put on white socks inside. Looks like Snow White! ! ~ "That night. Dr. Xu Ming, after work. Take a taxi to the specialty store that sells children's clothes. Hua 80 yuan bought a pair of red leather shoes. I bought two pairs of white socks. The next day, I went to the ward and put on red shoes and white socks for She Yan. She sat by the bed. Feet don't touch the ground. I like it. ! ! ! ! ! ! ~ what a pity. It was only worn for a short time. It's time for an injection. You should stick a needle in your foot for infusion. Soon I took off my socks and shoes. All people are looking forward to a miracle. Everyone is looking forward to the moment when Sheyan is reborn. Many citizens came to the hospital to visit She Yan. Many netizens on the Internet are asking the poor child. Her life makes this strange life full of light! ! ~ during that time, the ward was full of flowers and fruits. The intoxicating smell is everywhere. Two months of chemotherapy. She Yan experienced nine deaths. Septic shock. Sepsis. Hemolysis. Gastrointestinal bleeding ... every time. Chemotherapy plan determined by authoritative experts in children's hematology in the province and even the whole country. The effect is very good. "Leukemia" itself has been completely controlled. Everyone is looking forward to the good news of Sheyan's recovery! ! ! ~ but the possible complications caused by using chemotherapy drugs are very terrible. Compared with other children with leukemia. Her face is weak. At this time, after the operation, her constitution became worse. On the morning of August 20th. She asked Yan Fu "Aunt. You tell me. Why did they donate money to me? ! ""Because they are all good people. " "Aunt. I am also a kind person. " "You are a kind person by nature. Good people should help each other. You will become more kind. " He Yan took out a math exercise book from under the pillow. Pass it to Aunt Yan Fu. This is my suicide note ... "Yan Fu was shocked. Open it quickly. It was arranged by George W. Sheyan. This is an 8-year-old child who is dying. Lying in bed, I wrote a three-page suicide note with a pencil. Because the child is too young. Some words can't be written yet. There are many typos. I can see that. This article was not written in one breath. It is divided into six parts. It begins with "Aunt Yan Fu" and ends with "Goodbye, Aunt Yan Fu". The whole article "Aunt Yan Fu". Or "Aunt Fu" appeared seven times. Nine times, the reporter was called "Auntie", followed by 16. It's all for the sake of "please" after her death. She wants to express "thank you" and "goodbye" to people who care about her in the whole society through reporters. Bye, aunt. I will meet you in my dream. Aunt fu. My father's house is falling down. Dad, don't be angry. Do not jump. Aunt fu. You should watch my dad. Auntie. Give some of my money to our school. Aunt, thank you for telling the President of the Red Cross. After my death. Give the rest of the money to patients like me. Let them get better ... "This suicide note made Yan Fu burst into tears. Sobbing. "I've been here. I'm fine. "August 22nd. Due to gastrointestinal bleeding. She Yan, she can't eat for a month, and she is supported by infusion. The first time "stealing food", she broke off a piece of instant noodles and put it in her mouth. Soon gastrointestinal bleeding worsened. Doctors and nurses urgently gave her blood transfusion and infusion ... Seeing Sheyan's abdominal pain was unbearable. The appearance of pain. Many doctors and nurses cried. Everyone is willing to help her share the pain. But ... it's no use trying everything. She Yan's abdominal pain is unbearable. She begged all the doctors and nurses to say, "Let me die. I don't feel well ... "The doctor and nurse comforted her. Keep her going. It will be all right soon. Finally, She Yan passed away in extreme pain. The doctor stopped breathing after her. Still spared no effort to save 80 minutes. In the end, it failed to save this young life. She Yan, 8, finally got rid of the disease. Die peacefully. Everyone can't accept this fact. It's as beautiful as a poem. Did the "little fairy" as pure as water really go to another world? Reporter Yan Fu touched She Yan's cold little face and burst into tears. You can't call her aunt anymore. I can't laugh anymore. Websites such as Netease are immersed in tears. The internet was soaked with tears. " My heart hurts so much that I can't breathe. "There are tens of thousands of posts under the news posts of every website. The garlands are like mountains. The eulogy is like a sea. A middle-aged man muttered, "son. You are an angel in the sky. Open little wings. Fly ... "August 26th. Her funeral was held in the rain. Inside and outside the funeral home cremation Hall in the eastern suburb of Chengdu, people stood with tears in their eyes. They are all "parents" of an 8-year-old girl, She Yan, who have never met before, and were abandoned at birth. A girl who voluntarily gave up her life after suffering from leukemia. It won't be too lonely to leave at last. " Mom and Dad came silently to see me off from all directions in the rain. There is a picture of her smiling on her grave. The inscription in front of it reads: "I have been here. I'm fine (1996.11.30. -August 22, 2005). The back is engraved with a brief introduction about She Yan's life experience. The last two sentences are "in her lifetime. Feel the warmth of the world. Little girl. Please rest in peace. Heaven is more beautiful with you. "In accordance with the wishes of her yan. Put the remaining 540 thousand yuan in the medical expenses. As a gift of life. Left it to other children with leukemia. These seven children are. Yang xinlin. Xu Li. Huang Zhiqiang. Liu, and Wang Jie. These seven poor children. The oldest 19 years old. The youngest is only 2 years old. They all come from very difficult families. Poor child struggling on the brink of death. September 24th. Xu Li, the first girl to accept a gift from She Yan. After the successful operation at West China University of Medical Sciences. A smile hung on her pale face: "I accepted your life gift." Thank you, Sister She Yan. You must be watching us from heaven. Please rest assured. In the future, our tombstone will still be engraved with: "I have been here. I'm fine. " If it were me. I have no courage. Maybe. I can't stand the pain for a long time. I'm already dead. She insisted. Because of kindness. Because of love and hope. We are all of the same age. Or I'm a few months older than her. Am I as sensible as she is? Do I have her courage? What is my attitude towards difficulties? Is to give up Is to give up halfway If she survives. Should also enjoy the right to education like me. Feel the warmth and coldness of the world. For myself. I see. Because I'm just a cowardly fool. Her strength. Let me understand. Hold on. Thank you. Dear Yu Yan.