Before marriage, most women think that marriage life is to form a new family with their husbands and spend the rest of their lives together. However, the fact is not so simple. In marriage, a woman should not only run in with her husband and maintain the relationship between husband and wife, but also get along well with her husband. Only by having harmonious husband-wife relationship and mother-in-law relationship at the same time can we have a happy and complete marriage life.

Pumei has received many letters from female netizens before, and they all told me about the difficulties encountered in marriage. Among them, more than 80% of female netizens are in-laws and can't get along with them. They think that their parents-in-law are responsible for their unhappy marriage.

There is no denying that women, as daughters-in-law, came to live in her husband's family after marriage, so in the eyes of her husband's family, she was really an outsider in essence. In addition, because daughters-in-law are the apple of their parents' eyes in family of origin, most of them are spoiled by their families, and there are always some shortcomings and bad habits in them, perhaps rebellious or delicate.

But for the husband's family, especially the mother-in-law, they all want their daughter-in-law to be a sensible, obedient, virtuous and capable woman. They want their daughter-in-law to get married to help them share the burden of the family, not to create a burden for the family. It is precisely because of these concepts that many mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have high requirements for their daughters-in-law, and naturally there will be many contradictions between the two sides.

Among many letters from netizens, a netizen named Xin Li left a deep impression on this vulgar sister. The reason for her conflict with her husband's family is very special, but it is not uncommon. Pujie was lost in thought when she learned what had happened to her.

"I know this is a trap designed by my husband's family, but I have to fall in. I was really hard at the time, and I felt even more ridiculous. " This self-deprecating remark comes from the mouth of netizen Li Xin. She has just been married to her husband's family for about a month, and some behaviors of her husband's family have made her feel uncomfortable. Xin Li has been married for almost a year, and she is almost tired of her husband's family.

Xin Li and her husband Xu Qiangwei were introduced by relatives. Due to the similar family background and age, and the efforts of relatives, they got engaged after only three months.

Because Xin Li and Xu Qiangwei spent a short time together, they didn't have much affection and didn't know much about each other and each other's families, so they were more tempted and perfunctory together. Due to the lack of emotional foundation, Xin Li and Xu Qiangwei had a conflict at the engagement party because of the bride price.

According to local traditional standards, before getting married, Xu Qiangwei's family needs to give Li Xinjia/kloc-0.30 million to/kloc-0.80 million as a bride price, and then they have to have a car and a house. But Xu Qiangwei's parents don't agree with that standard, because although their family conditions are ok, there is a young son who is attending school besides Xu Qiangwei and his married daughter. If we really act according to that standard, then Xu Qiangwei's family will definitely borrow a lot of foreign debts.

At first, the two families refused to compromise, and Xu Qiangwei said to Xin Li directly and forcefully, "Xin Li, you really let me down. I didn't expect you and your family to be so unkind. Can't you think about my parents and family? "

In the face of Xu Qiangwei's accusation, Xin Li is not to be outdone. He said on the spot, "You said I didn't think about your parents, so have you thought about my parents?" Is your attitude worth my consideration for you? " After the conflict, Xin Li and Xu Qiangwei naturally had a cold war.

Later, both parents felt that procrastination was not the way, so they took a step back and held another negotiation. After that negotiation, they finally reached a consensus. As a result of the negotiation, Xu Qiangwei's family can not give a bride price, but must buy a house. Only Xin Li's name is written on the property ownership certificate, and Xinyi Li's family is responsible for the renovation cost of the house. After the agreement was passed, Xin Li and Xu Qiangwei got married soon.

At the wedding, Xin Li's parents gave Li Xinyi a bank card of100000 yuan, so that their daughter could have a higher status in her husband's family after marriage. Originally, Xin Li's parents meant well, but they never thought that this bank card would bring trouble to their daughter.

Almost a month after Xin Li got married, her mother-in-law came to borrow money from her. Xin Li has always been a generous and casual woman, so she lent money to her mother-in-law without saying anything. After the first time, the frequency of mother-in-law borrowing money gradually increased. At first, she borrowed it only once every two or three months, and then once every week or two. Although her mother-in-law borrowed very little money at a time, the frequency increased, and Xin Li was naturally unwilling.

Finally, when her mother-in-law borrowed money again, Xin Li summoned up the courage to refuse her mother-in-law for lack of money. Not surprisingly, in the face of Xin Li's refusal, her mother-in-law changed her face on the spot and said directly, "You work every month to earn a salary. When you got married, your parents gave you100000 yuan as a dowry. How can there be no money? "

After listening to her mother-in-law, Xin Li was stunned on the spot. It turns out that my mother-in-law has been thinking about her 100 thousand deposit for a long time Xin Li was particularly wronged and wanted to argue with her mother-in-law, but out of politeness, she held back. Originally, Xin Li thought that after her mother-in-law was rejected, she would never borrow money from her again, but the fact is not as simple as she thought.

Not long ago, my husband had dinner at home. At the end of dinner, my sister suggested that she was going to buy a house and asked Xin Li for help. Before Xin Li could speak, her mother-in-law spoke first. In front of everyone, she said to Xin Li, "Xin Li, the100000 yuan your parents gave you is useless. Now your aunt is going to buy a house. You should help her first. "

Until then, Li Xincai had to believe that her husband's family had already designed a trap for herself, and had long been concerned about the hundred thousand dollars in her hand. However, although Xin Li knows this very well and she can't stand the behavior of her in-laws, considering her pregnant body and newly formed family, she doesn't have the courage to protest.

The result is self-evident. Xin Li finally lent her sister100000 yuan. When all her savings were spent, Xin Li smiled to herself. She can only helplessly say to me: "I know this is a trap designed by my husband's family, but I can only fall into it." I am really sad and even more ridiculous. "

In the present life, it is not uncommon to see a situation similar to that in Xin Li. Of course, the reason why Li Xin encountered this kind of marriage problem has a lot to do with her own original choice. Xin Li knew he didn't know much about Xu Qiangwei and his family, but he still agreed to get married. It is understandable that these unexpected situations happen after marriage.

Through Xin Li's experience, Pumei wants to warn the female friends that before you decide to get married, you should not only know your fiance, but also know their family situation. There are two kinds of families. You should never get married.

The first type: families with poor family conditions and haggle over every ounce.

For this kind of family, Pujie believes that everyone has come into contact with it. If you think it doesn't matter if you are poor, and you are willing to marry a family with poor family conditions, then you must first ask yourself whether you can live without money and whether you can care about the eyes of others.

In addition, what makes the average girl feel that she can't get married is actually the kind of family that is not only poor, but also doesn't know how to unite and likes to haggle over every ounce. If you encounter poor family conditions and your in-laws like to haggle with you, then you should never get married. Because you marry into such a family, your future marriage life is not only poor materially, but also unhappy ideologically.

The second type: a family with many children and no ambition.

For this kind of family, most friends should be able to understand why that vulgar girl mentioned it. After all, it is difficult for a newly married daughter-in-law to get along with her mother-in-law. If there is a sister-in-law, elder sister, brother-in-law and uncle to accompany her, what kind of challenge will her future life be?

As you can imagine, if you marry into such a family, and your in-laws are not motivated, just like Xin Li's mother-in-law and elder sister-in-law, they only know how to borrow money from you. Can you accept it?