Nowadays, with the rising divorce rate, many people choose to remarry after divorce. A man who marries for the second time may have different feelings from a man who marries for the first time. Let's share the criteria for choosing a spouse for a second-married man.
Second-marriage male mate selection criteria 1 1. A woman with good character and a sense of responsibility.
As a man, if you need a "good wife and mother", you must find a woman with good quality and responsibility. In their minds, marriage and family occupy a great position.
She will take care of everything in order, and you will feel at ease with her. A responsible woman never worries that the other half will do something wrong. Appropriate restrictions are what they have always followed.
She would never do anything to speak ill of others behind their backs. Her moral character is absolutely good. Such a woman may be a little reticent, but she will tolerate your imperfections with her tolerance and generosity.
For a 40-year-old man, you need a woman who takes care of your life like a relative. Compared with the vigorous love pursued by young people, such a woman is more suitable to accompany you and spend the rest of your life with you safely.
2. A woman who has a lifelong view of marriage.
If you want to have a "quiet day", you must choose some women who will not "make trouble". Marriage is harmonious. When you are in your forties, even your marriage has traumatized you.
You can't deal with women who importune all day, or women who speak Spanish. You need people who share your aspirations and personality, and continue to run your marriage well.
Have you ever found that everyone and you have a heart that has experienced failure and wants to seek peace, so do marriage and love. When you are tired in a relationship, those who are gentle with you are the people you need most.
You need them to give you enough time to heal in your life, so that you can slowly make up for the wounds in your heart and learn to like each other. Many middle-aged married couples may not love each other very much, but this common need keeps them together and warm. They need this feeling.
3. A woman who has something to say to each other and is mentally compatible.
No matter how many times you fall in love or get married, emotional communication is a necessary condition. If you just want to find someone to live with, regardless of feelings, you might as well hire a nanny.
"Have something to say" is a seemingly simple but meaningful thing. Living with someone whose likes and opinions are completely different from their own, there will be constant contradictions, and the days will be like years.
It is important to find a woman who always knows and understands herself. Most couples divorce because they can no longer live in peace, so we are in another relationship, hoping to make up for the previous shortcomings.
When you find a soul mate with you, you will find that life can sometimes be much easier. Lovers talk more than one sentence, but with people with the same three views, there are always endless confidences.
The criteria for choosing a spouse for a second-married man 2. Remarried men tend to be more cautious.
Divorce is undoubtedly an ordeal for men and women.
Men who divorce impulsively because of lack of calm and long-term thinking during divorce generally do not feel fever and lack of thinking when they remarry.
Lin Bin's first marriage was such an impulsive person. When he first met his ex-wife, Macey, he fell in love at first sight and pursued it crazily. He didn't consider the suitability of these two families. Soon, there were serious differences in living expenses, and finally they had to divorce.
When faced with the choice again, Lin Bin's mother urged him many times, and he hesitated. He put off many blind dates on the grounds of busy work until he met Kiki now. Although she was a perfect match, Lin Bin didn't propose.
If men pursue passion at the first marriage, then most of them pursue stability at the second marriage. Men who get married twice will definitely be more cautious. As the saying goes, "You learn from a mistake", and no one wants to make the same mistake in marriage.
Remarried men will no longer easily believe that giving their heart will lead to eternal life. They will wrap up their passion, carefully observe and calmly analyze whether the woman to be selected is suitable for them. A man who marries for the second time must get into the relationship slowly. He needs to think in the process of getting along with women If I choose her, will it be stable when I get married?
As Eason Chan wrote Sang Song, "I want stability and happiness, and I can touch it with my hands. Every time I hold you in my arms, I have your temperature. " Men who remarry, like ignorant teenagers, will never be stupid enough to show women their hearts and lungs as soon as they start.
Remarried men are more realistic.
After the failure of marriage, the remarried man understands that the true meaning of marriage is love+life. When life is not guaranteed, even the best love will wither.
In reality, too many true loves can't stand the short test of daily necessities and parents, and finally they are defeated. Many times, we can't condemn those women who give up love for money, because we all know that if the same temptation is placed in front of us, most of us will make the same choice.
A very important reason why Lin Bin doesn't get married is actually Kiki's job. Lin Bin's work is quite good. In a foreign company, the annual salary is about150 thousand. Although the treatment is good, there is room for growth.
But Lin Bin still hopes that his other half can be a public institution, which will be more stable and easier to handle affairs in the future. However, Kiki is in a private enterprise, and her salary is not high, so there is no room for development. Lin Bin is very concerned about this, but he has never been able to say it.
I can't say it, but I have been hiding it in my heart. The so-called "no refusal, no initiative, no responsibility". Lin Bin, who pursues the "three noes" policy, makes Kiki completely puzzled by his heart.
Kiki doesn't know that remarried men have become more material, realistic and calculating after the baptism of their first marriage.
Their first consideration is not the emotional fit, but the woman's family conditions, work unit, income and so on. If these material conditions meet their expectations, they will be willing to pay for the woman because they have an account in mind. Is his effort equal to his reward?
In such an Alexandria society, perhaps we can't devote ourselves wholeheartedly to our feelings.
Remarried men have more obstacles and precautions.
The reality of remarried men largely stems from their painful past and heavy economic pressure.
Divorce from his ex-wife does not prove a man's ruthlessness. Many men still care about their ex-wives after divorce, perhaps out of guilt or because they have too many difficulties. "I am a white rabbit, my clothes are not as good as new, and people are not as good as old." Maybe it will be more difficult to give up and start a new relationship after I leave.
In fact, Lin Bin has been thinking about his ex-wife Macey. Macey comes from a superior family. He is the only child in the family. When he first fell in love, it was really good for Lin Bin. Macey has good food, clothing, housing and transportation, which Lin Bin doesn't like, but Macey is also generous to him. He often buys Lin Bin brands that he has never heard of, which makes Lin Bin's clothes at work cool.
However, when I met Kiki, Kiki was an ordinary child. She is very economical, but is she here for his good economic conditions? Does she really love him? These are unknown in Lin Bin's mind.
In addition to this psychological burden, there is also an economic burden. The divorce divided half of Lin Bin's property, and the children were given to Macey. Lin Bin must bear the child support. If you buy a wedding room again, the economy will be really stretched. Later, Kiki knew that Lin Bin would give one-third of the child support every month. Can she be willing to give it up? Lin Bin is really confused.
The criteria for choosing a spouse for a second-married man 3 Which one will be happy, second marriage or remarriage?
First, second marriage or remarriage, which will be happy?
No one is happier. In fact, such things are not absolute and cannot be compared, because everyone's divorce, remarriage or remarriage are different.
Some people divorce because of emotional disharmony, others because of the betrayal of the other half, and so on, so the reasons for emotional breakdown are different, so the chances of remarriage and whether they are really happy in the future are uncertain factors, or we must rely on ourselves to judge.
Second, why are most second marriages unhappy?
1. It's hard to blend in and pay attention to each other.
Everyone knows how difficult it is to have a second marriage family, and it is even harder to have a heart-to-heart, especially with children. Because no matter whether the man or the woman is involved in other families with their children, first of all, there is no blood relationship; Secondly, if both parties have children, it will be more difficult to get along, not to mention not finding the right person. Everyone is selfish.
2. Psychological stress, psychological numbness
The pressure of second marriage will definitely be greater. If the second marriage is more unhappy, what relatives and friends around you will think of you, including your parents, will only be more worried. My heart is numb, I can bear it, I won't say goodbye to my first marriage, and I dare not say divorce easily even if I am unhappy.
You can't change your nature, and you won't be happy anymore.
Since you will get divorced, it means that you must have defects. In fact, women should correct their shortcomings immediately, instead of indulging blindly. Maybe you will get along with your second partner with the mentality that he will tolerate your shortcomings, but it turns out that you overestimate others.
4. No emotional foundation
Remarried couples are generally introduced by others, and they all get married with a certain purpose. Because you are not a husband and wife who really love each other, it is inevitable that you will get your own place after marriage, and you will not reach a consensus in life and eventually divorce.
Third, the mentality of second-married women after remarriage.
selfish
Because she had paid selflessly, but the final result made her black and blue, so after remarriage, she would become selfish and afraid to pay easily. After all, there is a saying that once bitten, twice shy.