How would you feel if it were you? I think most of the answers are unhappy.
For many women, a man's willingness to take himself out is a sign of love, which proves that men like to be with you all the time.
In fact, men don't want to take their wives out, mostly because they think their wives embarrass them.
I saw a video on the Internet. Go out alone to find friends. He never takes his wife out. His wife's begging was refused, and he said, "Look at you now, like an old lady. My brother can't laugh at me when he goes out. "
What woman is not glamorous before marriage, just for her lover and children, wiping off lipstick, washing and cooking, and changing from a beautiful woman to a housewife.
What are the requirements for women to do this? They bet their luck all their lives just to pursue a warm and sincere love.
However, how many women can get such deep love?
In the history of China literature, there was a woman who got the most sincere and affectionate love from her husband. This woman is the bride in Six Chapters of a Floating Life.
Shen Fu, Yunniang's husband, broke free from the secular rules and regulations in that feudal society where men are superior to women, and took Yunniang out to sing poetry and drink with friends, and took his favorite person to bask in his deepest love in front of friends. Even in the most difficult times, they have always been together, and their love is inseparable.
After the mourning for his mother, Shen Fu also used pen and ink to recall the dribs and drabs of getting along with his mother, and compiled it into a book called Six Chapters of a Floating Life.
Shen Fu is also really amazing. He pushed his wife to the throne of "the loveliest woman in the history of China literature", while Shen Fu himself was called "the most affectionate man in the history of China literature" by later generations.
The book Six Chapters of a Floating Life is very classic and famous. Known by many scholars as "Little Red Mansion in the Late Qing Dynasty". Being able to compare with A Dream of Red Mansions is enough to show how high this novel is in the literary world.
In this book, Shen wrote that his life with his mother's husband and wife was interesting and leisurely, and he had been displaced and separated after middle age. What he wrote was the daily life of literati wearing cloth clothes at that time, which was very close to the life of ordinary people, so it caused great repercussions in the workshop.
By reading this book, we can understand the rise of women in the late Qing Dynasty from the husband and wife, understand that judging a person must correspond to the background of the times, and understand that the life of husband and wife must be interesting and ceremonial, so that marriage can be maintained!
Today, we mainly discuss why Yun got Shen Fu's heart.
Mother is uncle Shen Fu's daughter. Her surname is Chen Mingyun, and she is the daughter of Uncle Shen. Yun was clever and witty since he was a child, and he could recite the long poem Pipa Xing very quickly at an early age.
Unfortunately, her father died when she was four years old. Father left, the pillar of the family was gone, and the family was penniless. Yun and his mother and brother can barely make ends meet.
In fact, God has given people wisdom as well as suffering.
Cloud's cleverness is embodied in embroidery and weaving. Her embroidery is very delicate, and all three of us live by her craft. She has been providing education for her brother.
Of course, the cleverness of the cloud is not only reflected in the embroidery, weaving and dyeing technology of celestial bodies, but also in the pen and ink.
Non-success is really a very clever woman. She dug out Pipa Xing, recognized it word by word, and then learned the lyrics by heart. Her spare time of embroidery was used by her to read books, and she gradually learned to write poems, and wrote such a wonderful sentence as "Autumn invades the thin figure and frost dyes the chrysanthemum fat".
Shen Fu fell in love with her at first sight because of her loving nature.
At that time 13-year-old Shen Fu went back to her mother's house with her mother, and in the crowd full of new clothes and fine clothes, she took a fancy to the elegant, handsome and graceful cloud.
After reading Yun's poems, Shen Fu was even more amazed at her talent and moved by her. She immediately said to her mother, "If you choose a wife for me, I would rather not marry a non-Shu Jie Zhen." Shen Fu's mother also likes Yun's gentleness and understanding, so she took off her gold ring and gave it to Yun, and the engagement between Yun and Shen Fu was settled.
Don't think that non-success is a stunning beauty, and Shen Fu's soul has been taken away. In fact, the cloud has two exposed teeth, just some buckteeth, which are not very good.
And non-success was attracted by Shen Fu at first sight. In my opinion, it is because non-success is good enough, dignified and elegant in words and deeds, gentle and talented in temperament. Such a woman with temperament, her every move, every word and deed, and every smile are fascinating.
The story of love at first sight between Shen Fu and Yun Niang reminds me of a sentence: "When I am good enough, I will meet you". I think this sentence is especially suitable for clouds.
Before meeting the right person, she constantly cultivated herself, became a person who practiced both inside and outside, became a better self, lived up to the right person at the right time, and then got together sweetly.
Therefore, I think that the reason why my mother can be with Shen Fu is because she is an excellent person.
My mother's family is poor, and she needs a younger brother to study at home. My mother has no ability to make a living. On the other hand, Shen Fu, with a good family background and a scholar, is somewhat lofty?
There is not only a gap in status between the two, but to put it bluntly, the door is not right. Besides, my mother's family is poor and she has no money to go to school. Relatively speaking, she doesn't learn much.
The advantage of being a mother is that despite her poor family, she never gives up on herself, makes money, sings poetry, is smart and has a good temper.
This is why Shen Fu fell in love with his mother at first sight and didn't marry her. After all, an interesting soul is one in a million!
Then we can think: What should we do before meeting the right person to become a better self and an attractive person?
A woman, if she wants to be a charming person, must know how to cultivate her mind from the outside.
External repair type, that is, to see whether a person's dress, words and deeds are appropriate.
Even if a person is not very good-looking, she dresses with good taste and grace, which is more attractive than those people with beautiful faces, sloppy clothes and no culture.
Some people may say, I don't pay attention to appearance, I only pay attention to the beauty of the soul.
But think about it, no one has the leisure to discover your excellent inner self through your sloppy appearance.
Therefore, women must pay attention to dressing up, be clean and have taste. Dressing well doesn't mean wearing big names, but wearing clothes that suit you.
Ms Chanel, who created this fashion empire, said: "You can be gentle, cheerful, flattering, lazy, informal and casual. The only thing that can't be sloppy. Wearing shabby clothes, people only remember that shabby clothes; Dressed impeccably, people will remember women who wear clothes. "
What kind of image do you give others, then what kind of impression do you leave on others.
Dress appropriately and behave appropriately.
Even if a person dresses beautifully, his words and deeds are rude and give a bad impression.
I remember that on May Day, a beautiful woman in a high-end suit was picking leaves and twisting flowers while walking by the West Lake. When she was reminded by an ordinary-looking woman not to destroy the flowers, she proudly said, "I am the boss of a listed company no matter how incompetent I am."
No matter how good a woman looks, no matter how beautiful she dresses, no matter how brilliant her career is, her words and deeds will also reduce her personal charm.
A woman with ordinary looks and buck teeth is the most attractive person who dares to stand up and say no to other people's bad behavior.
In ordinary life, you will have a better impression in others' minds if you are civilized, trustworthy, polite, graceful, humorous, not boasting, not exaggerating and not hurting others.
Cultivating the mind is actually cultivating temperament, because temperament is a kind of existence beyond beauty and a charming light from the inside out.
Temperament is a person's best brand, which can leave a good impression on people more than wearing famous brands and luxury goods. You don't have to spend any money to have temperament. Study hard to enrich your soul, correct your character and be an educated person.
Enriching yourself is actually studying hard.
Zeng Guofan said: "It is difficult to change a person's temperament, but only reading can change his temperament."
Although temperament is not so easy to change, you can get better as long as you study hard.
Read more books, you can collect the aura of masters from books, absorb the essence of culture, open a door to the soul, see a wider world, become wiser, and finally walk out of a better life.
People who don't study lose their temperament revealed in their bones, while those who know how to study reveal their charming charm.
If you want to talk about a woman who is attractive because of her good study, who do you have in mind? I was thinking about Dong Qing.
Speaking of the name Dong Qing, the first thing that comes to my mind is a beautiful, generous and intellectual figure standing on the stage.
Dong Qing was forced to read poetry books by his father since childhood. After reading for a long time, he got used to it. When she grew up, she had great glory and high status, but she never gave up studying.
It is her study day after day that makes her a "Top Ten CCTV Hosts" and a well-deserved "CCTV Sister". Let us also see that Dong Qing, who is eloquent in the program "Chinese Poetry Congress and Readers", is elegant in knowledge and outstanding in temperament.
Behind the radiance, it stems from her long-term persistence in reading and reading newspapers and profound cultural accumulation, which makes her a person with noble interests and an intellectual and elegant person.
A person, immersed in the sea of books every day, will exude attraction from the inside out and form his own unique charm.
After reading it, I have enriched my soul, and I should also know how to correct my conduct and be an educated person.
The most important thing in a person's life is not how much wealth you have and how successful your career is, but whether a person's character is honest and cultivated.
Everyone knows about Audrey Hepburn, right? Hepburn is a goddess in everyone's eyes, but she is called a goddess not only because she is beautiful, after all, there are many people who are more beautiful than her. People who are more beautiful than Hepburn can't be remembered by the whole world. Hepburn did it. The main reason is actually Hepburn's outstanding personality and cultivation.
In her last words, she said: "If you want beautiful lips, you must say kind words;" If you want a slim figure, share your food with the hungry; For elegant gestures, remember that you are not the only pedestrian when you walk. "
These are all cultivated things, and cultivation is the best business card, making Hepburn an idol of women all over the world.
There should be a sentence, "character is a person's strongest card, and cultivation is the best proof."
An educated person knows how to respect others from the heart and is kind to others.
Knowing how to respect others is not a superficial greeting, but a sincerity that can come from the bottom of my heart. It is warmth, equality and recognition.
I still remember the dog abuse incident of medical postgraduates in Nantong University. As a medical graduate, he has a high degree. Obviously, his inner cultivation is not worthy of his education.
If you don't know that all beings are equal and don't respect animals, you are actually an uncultured person.
There are many people with knowledge, but not many people really know how to respect others. The word respect seems simple, but it is not easy to do.
To achieve true respect, we must know how to respect the privacy of friends, the care of relatives, the ideas of children, different values and different people and things.
People who know how to respect, intellectual elegance, personality charm will be sublimated.
An educated person not only knows how to respect others, but also is kind to others.
I don't know if you have the experience of taking your children on the high-speed rail without tickets. Did anyone see you holding the baby and offer you your seat?
I often take the high-speed train and see that some mothers have no place with their children, and some will give up their places to that mother and stand alone for a few hours.
Seeing such a thing, I am very moved and feel that the world is so warm. But I can't help feeling sorry for the man who gave up his position and had to stand for hours.
Therefore, every time I take my children on the high-speed train and I can't get a ticket, I will bring my own folding stool, so that I won't be very tired and won't disturb others.
Going out without causing trouble to others is my consciousness as an old mother.
I appreciate the kindness of others, but I don't want to rely on them all the time. After all, everyone has their own difficulties.
Understanding others is actually very simple, such as not littering to increase the workload of cleaning staff; Don't talk loudly in the library, which will affect others' reading; Don't make phone calls in the rest area, which will affect others' rest; Don't violate traffic rules and hinder other pedestrians. ...
Knowing how to think of others is reflected in these details. Considering others from the nuances is the best cultivation.
Every woman should always dress herself up, dress appropriately, behave gracefully, read more books, practice hard and be a delicate and elegant woman.
Only in this way can we cross the beauty of youth in girlhood and enter the twilight of young adults appropriately, and still exude rich, affectionate, attractive and warm charm in a life as plain as water.