Can you find so many mistakes in the past two years and never communicate with your daughter? Adolescence is very important for the development of girls in all aspects. Maybe you and your husband are very busy, and the work-life society makes you too busy to care about your daughter's growth. Maybe you noticed, but you just didn't! But many excuses can't cover up your dereliction of duty as a parent! Please reflect on yourself first!

When students take the entrance examination in junior high school, they are faced with various pressures, some of which are even suppressed invisibly by people around them. They are still young, and some small things that their parents think are a hurdle for them to move forward. The children of this generation are much more fragile and have delicate feelings. It is not a matter of paying attention to it, but a matter of understanding and recognition.

Your daughter and friends have no friends, do they? I mean girlfriend! Cheerful optimism does not mean studying well! Your story makes me feel that your communication with your husband and children is obviously insufficient. If the child doesn't have a best friend who dares to talk to her, there will be more and more things in her heart, and naturally she will want a safe friend who won't betray, and always pay attention to friends who think of her! Nowadays, most children are only children. I hope to have a brother and sister of the same age who can take care of themselves and understand themselves. So some children created such a friend+relative by themselves. When the reality can't meet the requirements of them or the people around them, they pull this virtual friend out as a shield. Some use diaries as communication channels, while others talk to themselves in the mirror. These are also a kind of talk. Instead of jumping off a building to commit suicide or something, let off steam.

As for what's going on now, I can give you some suggestions:

First of all, your daughter didn't encounter paranormal phenomena, mental illness, or a patient, just a little girl who was troubled in adolescence. I hope you don't look sad and blink when you face her. That's your daughter, not a monster.

Secondly, communicate with her more. Not forcing you to ask me an answer, but chatting, understand? Let her think of her parents when she encounters problems, not the person in her heart. Teach her how to deal with it instead of dealing with it for her. Be sure to tell her why. Such a big child knows nothing. Even if some children are still naive, their families should treat them as independent individuals with respect. The most important thing is empathy. Please pay attention to her every question. Don't judge how insignificant her difficulties are by the experience of adults. If you hurt her once, she will never give you a second chance.

Finally, I think you should talk to a regular psychologist about her inner voice processing process. People who don't go to mental hospitals are crazy. People in many big cities are more or less in a state of mental sub-health. In fact, everyone can go there to chat with someone as a SPA for the soul. But don't take her directly to the hospital. Now many people are afraid of mental illness, which can be seen from the derogatory term mental illness. First, you and your husband should ask more doctors. At present, doctors have different levels and there are many quacks. Treat their comments rationally. No psychiatrist will reveal your troubles, or you can sue them for smearing. You find the right doctor and then communicate with your daughter in a doctor's way. Communication, not therapy. If you drag her to the hospital, she will think that you think she is a sick mental derangement, and will naturally resist and say nothing, but will lose trust.

By the way, it's important to learn something, but it's really not as important as having a healthy and happy daughter! University is another environment, a small semi-open society. At that time, you couldn't control it and help her life. Now experience more with her, teach her, help her, have more family activities or travel, and give her more reasons to be happy. Maybe my words are alarmist. Living happily and healthily is much more meaningful than a diploma from a famous university.