Maybe people in other dormitories smoke, stay up late, swear and drink, which you don't like.
So if we choose not to take the responsibility at this time, isn't this a war with them?
There is a saying, since you can't change the environment, leave!
In fact, choosing people who can't bear it is easy to have conflicts between them, while choosing people who can bear it is to avoid conflicts.
I have always felt that there must be a better way to solve the problem, instead of choosing to bear it.
Avoiding problems is actually not the best way.
What I can honestly tell you needs your feelings, and then what?
Listen to their needs and feelings. After all, we are all human beings. After four years in college, you will feel that people who get along with you day and night will often have a good impression in the end.
How to cultivate feelings? People who often talk to you, people who often eat with you, people who often sleep with you, well, they are not lovers, but roommates.
Then let's think about it. We can't get along with our roommates, and we choose not to bear it. So what benefits will it bring us after we choose not to bear it? We had a conflict with each other, and then what?
Several roommates have established different groups, which is good for who? Can it be said that we have been in an endless war since we went to college these years?
If there are many smokers in our boys' dormitory, we can advise them to ask them to smoke outside and in the toilet, not in the room. Actually, a good relationship can have a good conversation effect. We should tell them these things.
It is based on a good relationship, and then it will have a good conversation effect.
Then we choose patience, that is, to calm our bad emotions, and then let ourselves adjust our emotions and talk to each other.
Then we chose not to let us vent our emotions, and we blamed each other. Then you think about it, they will endure, endure, and may feel that they don't get along with you. Then both parties choose not to bear it. What is the final relationship? Come to a deadlock.
When we speak or do things, we should consider the consequences, all aspects, and how to achieve a state that is beneficial to ourselves and each other.
Then forbearance is a better way.
Because you are standing in a higher energy position than the other party to look at them, understand them, understand them and tolerate them.
They will gradually find that you can understand them, you can understand them, you can accept them, and they will gradually do what you want them to do, because they later think that you should really care about them, not only for yourself, but also for each other.
When the other person understands that you are thinking of them, they will naturally do something that they think is beneficial to themselves and you.
If we choose to be reluctant among college roommates, then we will encounter all kinds of emotions that make us feel reluctant. For example, in the future, we meet an alcoholic hugging you in the street. Of course, she didn't mean to, or she accidentally stepped on her foot on the bus, or was accused at work, and so on. All kinds of things will suddenly come to you, so will we all choose reluctance?
In fact, when we choose to endure, we are giving ourselves time to think, while when we choose not to endure, we are not giving ourselves time to think, but just instinct.
We observe animals. Animals fight for food. They can't think. They choose to endure. Anyone here? People are rational, animals are instinctive, and people can control instinct with reason, so we choose to bear it.
If many roommates make you angry, can we get along well?
In the future, we may have many emotions, but we can adjust our emotions, and then what? It is of course the best to communicate with each other, and perhaps we can reach an agreement. These premises are your inner peace, so how do you balance it? Is to choose to endure it first.
So when you don't get along well with your college roommate, do you choose to bear it or not? I choose to endure.