When did you hear this sentence? It probably dates back to the last century, but I guess my understanding of this sentence must have started with my mother.
Because for my mother, face is the most important thing for a person.
She can lend out the money she has saved for a long time, as long as someone asks; I can also give my favorite fairy tale book to my neighbors and children in their eager eyes, regardless of my face that I am about to cry.
She often said, you can't leave others behind, you should cherish your face.
This is not a decent life!
Although I have always held objections in my heart, from a child who can only hold back tears to a college student who can support himself now, my face seems to have always been "explosive" and has never changed during my growth.
I didn't really realize how important it is to be cheeky until I went to college.
- 1-
What should I do if I am rejected, failed and have no result? People will laugh at me. Awkward.
There was a heavy snow just before the winter vacation in freshman winter. At night, I suddenly felt abdominal cramp and went to the bathroom. Sure enough, relatives came to visit.
After rummaging in the cupboard for a long time, I couldn't find what I needed, and I couldn't help blaming myself.
At that time, the dormitory door was closed. In normal times, I would definitely run out in the heavy snow and buy a bag myself, but at that time I could only ask others for help.
You can't imagine that in order to borrow sanitary napkins from my roommate, I actually did psychological construction for half an hour.
For a long time, I always felt it was a shameful thing to borrow something from others. I'm afraid to ask others for help. What if they refuse? Isn't that humiliating?
I carefully "maintain" my self-esteem and keep moving forward on the road of self-discipline.
I seldom take part in all kinds of competitions in college. I hate everything linked to competitions. I always live an ordinary life in a shell that I think is very safe, just to avoid that possible failure.
Although I know in my heart that other people's opinions are actually insignificant, I still care about other people's opinions. I am afraid that I won't win the prize and I will be laughed at by my classmates, so I never stand in the spotlight and express myself freely.
The biggest mistake is not to give yourself a chance to make mistakes.
In fact, there is hidden self-confidence behind the thin face. If you have no confidence in yourself, you will be afraid of whether the road ahead is open or foggy.
Knowing that I missed many precious experiences and opportunities to see the world, sometimes I look in the mirror and want to say to the haggard person inside: Hey, are you a fool?
-2-
The world belongs to thick-skinned people, who are afraid of losing more because of losing face.
A familiar school girl of mine is in a bad mood recently. WeChat official account, official school, started late. It was managed by several students before, and there was no open recruitment. My junior year is very interested in this official WeChat account. Since last year, I have been doing some copywriting planning and writing articles.
Over the past year, she has accumulated a lot of experience. She is proficient in photography and the use of some software. Besides, she can draw cartoons, so she can be independent. She has been looking forward to participating in the operation and management of the official WeChat account.
One year later, the official WeChat account of the school has matured and recently began to recruit new students. My junior also signed up with great interest. After the interview, she waited expectantly for SMS to inform her that she could officially work in the official WeChat account of the school in the future.
Who knows, she was waiting for the cheers of her classmates in the dormitory next door, and she cried at that time.
"The selected students are not good at this at all. She is just good at getting along with people and likes to express herself, even if it is exaggerated. "
"She obviously didn't know how to use the software, but she said she would. During the interview, she had a good chat with the students in charge of enrollment. "
"How can she be so fresh? I know that my personality is not very likable, but how can those people in the official WeChat account make decisions based on personal likes and dislikes? "
Junior buried his head and sobbed in a low voice. She is also introverted. She is not very good at dealing with others, nor is she very good at climbing relationships. She stubbornly believes in strength. Even if she contributed to the official WeChat account for one year, she didn't add those classmates' WeChat.
The strength can't reach the limit, even if it accounts for 99%, it will lose to the last 1%. And isn't relationship a kind of ability?
It is not shameful to actively communicate and talk with others, nor is it shameful to show your advantages generously.
Be thick-skinned, take the initiative and dare to show yourself, so as to know more people. Interpersonal circle and ability are indispensable capital for personal development, so you have to put down your attitude and operate.
Yan Jiehe, former president of Pacific Construction Group, once said: What is face? We are never shameless in doing great things. We can tear off our faces, throw them on the ground, kick them a few feet and walk away.
This passage gave me a deep feeling. Our proud face and lofty, in fact, is a pair of shackles and a cage, which hinders the pace of progress and prospects for the future.
-3-
"Only shameless people will become successful people."
I have always felt that my good friend Qing is particularly shameless, which is simply awe-inspiring.
She is the monitor of our class, and she snatched this position from others. When I first went to college, most of the positions in some courses were set by default. Although the counselor said that everyone voluntarily signed up for the election, everyone knew it well and accepted it silently.
Sunny, however, did the opposite. She stood on the platform of the amphitheatre and delivered a speech for more than half an hour, with meticulous words.
Later, the whole class unanimously agreed that Daqing should be the monitor, leaving the counselor and the classmates who had decided before to stare at each other.
Is she ashamed? What a pity! After talking in front of so many people for so long, you still look like you are not afraid of anything. Who do you think you are?
Is she ashamed? It's not a shame! In the face of bad phenomena, everyone chose silence, only she dared to speak out, dare to question, dare to try and dare to fight for it, just like a fearless warrior covered in blood, which made people respect.
Those shameless people are actually more courageous. They know what they want. They can resist the external pressure, try hard to find new ways and choose different answers.
Shameless people give themselves a long face.
-4-
Thick-skinned people are actually synonymous with excellent psychological quality. Thick-skinned people can correctly understand setbacks and failures, have indomitable courage, and can withstand the critical blow of life, and their future has more possibilities.
Most thin-skinned people lack self-confidence, are afraid of failure, and live in such a narrow environment that they may never know that they can change their lifestyle.
Thin skin, people can't find a real home.
So how do you make yourself shameless? I think we should start with cultivating self-confidence. After all, impudence requires confidence.
There is a particularly useful sentence in The Weakness of Human Nature: "The way to cultivate self-confidence is to do what you are afraid to do and get a record of a successful experience."
Zhihu netizen fat cat also said:
"You did one thing.
You did another thing.
At this time, you will suddenly realize that if you continue to do this, you will probably succeed. This feeling is called confidence. "
A small step to break through yourself is a big step to become handsome and beautiful! Find self-confidence in the sense of accomplishment and polish a tough and powerful heart.
You will find that "thick-skinned" is not a derogatory term to a great extent, it represents strength, courage, full of fighting spirit and full of hope for the future.