-"Pain and Happiness"
This is a road of no return.
Because this road seems to have exceeded the length of life, once chosen, it is a lifetime thing. It is like a sister, but most people can only follow her shadow. Her name is learning.
We followed her all the way and called this behavior school. From enlightened kindergartens to ignorant primary schools, from mushrooming middle schools to universities full of flowers, one step at a time.
I dreamed of Tsinghua Peking University in primary school and chose Tsinghua in middle school. When I entered high school, I suddenly felt that my dream was far away, but I still "regretted" and made Zhejiang University a beautiful university dream. In a blink of an eye, I want to open the door of senior three. No, I have opened this door, in this backward city.
As Bai said in Pain and Happiness, at that moment far from this dream, I imagined many endings, many miracles, spectacular and beautiful.
Remember when I was young, I once boasted that I would only take the Tsinghua exam in the future. This sentence made my parents laugh. For me who grew up in the countryside, I don't know how difficult this road is. I just study hard, that's all. When I graduated from primary school, I didn't go to the township to register. Because I'm waiting for the experimental middle school in the city, and I never thought that I would fail the exam, so I thought: I'll take the exam in Tsinghua in the future. That summer, I was admitted to the city experimental middle school with the first place in our school (in fact, I was admitted to five places in a * * *), and I was quite satisfied with the score outside the fractional line of 12. However, I haven't realized that one day behind the scenes, there are people outside-such a situation.
My parents moved to the city because of me, and my family crowded into a rental house. In these days, I lost my laughter. Because I can't find the boy who grew up with me, I have lost my fearless courage, leaving only strangeness and loneliness. I was only in the middle of my first grade exam. This unsatisfactory result actually makes parents very happy. I am unwilling, because I don't work hard, I am not qualified to go to Tsinghua. Don't be afraid of loneliness and strangeness, because if you want it, you must lose it. After class, I am as quiet as the air. I concentrate on lectures, become a monk, and devote myself to Zen. In the second day of junior high school, my grades ranked in the top 50 of the Ministry. After graduating from grade three, he was sent to the best high school nearby. I boldly went forward and rushed forward happily, as if the castle of the university had opened the door to meet me.
The road to college seems to be smooth sailing, but when I stepped into the nearest road to college, all my fantasies and imaginary beauty were shattered.
The first exam in senior one, I completely fell into a trough. I passed the 300-level exam, and I reflected on my recent arrogance. And I have a deeper understanding and more mature thinking about society. Tsinghua, this is a dream. I realize more and more clearly that with my present achievements, Tsinghua is as far away from the North Pole as the South Pole is, and even if I work hard, there will be no result. I gave up. That year, my handwriting changed a lot. My classmates say that I have changed from an aloof "Lin Daiyu" to a lively and depraved modern woman, and I don't deny it. Copying homework every day to deal with the teacher, thinking about some messy dreams in class. Because the reality has broken the dream of college, why should I try to round it up?
When I came home from vacation, I saw my parents who were still tired and remembered their proud expressions because of me. I haven't forgotten everything, I just want to cry with them. However, growing up in the country, I am not good at expressing myself, so I can only hide under the covers and cry. Walking on the street in my hometown, there is such a comment behind it: children are really promising ... yes, there is no one in our village in that middle school except me. Most of them have dropped out of school to work, and junior high school students have chosen to go to technical schools. There are fewer and fewer people familiar with me on this road, and I am doomed to be lonely. The villagers didn't know my depravity, but it was their words that woke me up. Did I choose high school only to work in the future? That's not true.
In those heartless days, I felt insecure because my memory was empty. If you don't have the courage to work hard, how can you expect a happy ending? Therefore, after fully understanding the level of the school and my own ability, I chose Zhejiang University to move on. I'm not sure if Zhejiang University can choose me. This summer vacation, I will use my knowledge of more than ten years to think about my college dream. Whether I am chosen or not, this is the path I chose and the best dream I dreamed when I was young.
Less than a year from the college entrance examination, I have clearly recognized the direction of the road.
It turns out that this college dream is not as spectacular and beautiful as originally imagined. It is full of pain and sweat, but also full of heaviness and happiness.
Pursuing my college dream, I enjoy this mood-pain and happiness.