It's not that some people understand it as a male mistake. To some extent, men are also victims, but also victims. The most important thing for couples to get along with is a word "harmony". What is "combination" means that things face each other when they happen as a whole.
The first impression of male compatriots on "not being a virgin before marriage" is: debauchery, meanness, shamelessness, no self-love, no sense of responsibility, no self-discipline, no respect for marriage and no understanding of "love". . . . . . This concept is influenced by traditional concepts. Male compatriots can often accept a "girlfriend" who is not a virgin, but can't accept a wife who is not a virgin. Because "wife" is a traditional concept, the first impression of unmarried men when they mention the word "wife" is a virtuous woman. Obviously, losing your virginity before marriage does not match a virtuous woman.
But not being a virgin has become a fact. What should we do?
Remember that the charm of women lies in "softness" and the value of men lies in "rigidity". In fact, you can be soft and hard.
1 When you are ready to fall in love with a strange man, don't talk too much about your shortcomings from the beginning. It is best not to say that you are not a virgin and other principled shortcomings. If someone asks you, you also politely avoid it. If you say it directly, men will subconsciously define you as the first impression mentioned above.
After determining the relationship between boyfriend and girlfriend, let the other party think that you are a virtuous person and let the other party know that you are a self-disciplined person. Generally speaking, it is to make the other party completely unable to imagine the first impression words mentioned above.
After step 2, you find a suitable opportunity to talk to him. For example, when you two are very happy, you suddenly say seriously that you are not a virgin, and you should say it with guilt and regret. Then add crying and tears, and it is best to cry "You are a good man, I don't deserve you" (this move is called retreat). Pay attention to his condition. If the other person hesitates, rush to hug him and cry that you can't bear to part with him. . . The other party said to think about it, and you said, "I respect your choice and I will wait for you."
Call and care about each other all the time during the other party's consideration, but don't mention whether he will accept you or not, so the initiative belongs to the other party completely. Everything should go with the flow, and at the same time be prepared to break up. Your success rate is only 50%.
After the fourth success, you should be very happy and moved, you can cry with joy, try your best to care for him, even stick to him, and make the other person feel that you are better.
Everything looks as if you will succeed, but always be on your guard. Be careful that the other person only accepts you on the surface and doesn't want to be with you psychologically. How to test whether the other party is a true gentleman or a hypocrite? The best way is to refuse premarital sex. Your reason for refusing is reasonable: what happened in the previous paragraph has made you sad and regret, and I don't want to do the same thing again. If the other person just wants to play with you after knowing that you are not a virgin, you will get angry or shrink back once you make this request. Girlfriends can eventually develop into lovers or wives. The more severely you refuse premarital sex, the more loyal you are, and the more like a wife. On the contrary, if you cater to each other, you will make them think that you are more like a lover or even a bitch. So when you are in love, the more you refuse to marry your man, the more you love you.
If all goes well and you get married, don't relax, and don't relax too much, because the official "battle" has just begun. You really want to train yourself into a virtuous wife, so that he can rest assured and have no regrets. You'd better get on well with your parents-in-law. Don't ask your parents-in-law for help in any case, but please don't make trouble for yourself. Kill an ex-boyfriend or even someone related after marriage.
Shortly after your wedding, when your husband is very happy, you should seriously tell him that you are going to the hospital to mend your hymen, and don't let him regret it all his life. In fact, it doesn't matter whether it is supplemented or not. Mainly for his consideration, to express a heart that cherishes and loves him. A good husband wants to cut off all the "love" after marriage for you.
Have a baby as soon as possible. You don't want to be carefree like many virgins and enjoy the feeling of falling in love after marriage. A woman who becomes a mother will exude a unique "brilliance". I am just a good wife, and now I want to be a good mother. Take good care of your husband and children and live a happy life.
10 Leave a bottom line for yourself and allow your husband to cheat once, just once. If this happens, you should work harder and behave better. Don't let your good husband fall into hell. Under normal circumstances, if the first nine articles are fulfilled, this will not happen.
Generally speaking, the above 10 is to "conquer" a good man and husband gently and thoroughly with the tactical principles of "fostering strengths and avoiding weaknesses" and "retreating for progress". Everything contains sensibility and rationality, and love and marriage are more perceptual. As long as you give men a good feeling, it doesn't matter where they are.
The reason why the virgin complex has become a man's weakness is because the male role is a "rigid" role formed under social consciousness, and it is easy to go to extremes when it comes to premarital misconduct, infidelity and other things. At the same time, China's historical and cultural background also aggravated this thought. This explains that when many men have a strong wife, the virgin complex will naturally be much lower, because "rigidity decreases and flexibility increases."
There is a proverb in China: "If you are in trouble, solve it yourself;" You owe yourself a debt, and you pay it yourself. "The decision of premarital sex lies with the woman, and it also lies with her to solve her husband's virgin complex, as long as she uses appropriate wisdom and proactive methods. Perhaps through their unremitting efforts, they have achieved a lifetime marriage that even virgins with "advantages" can't match.
When choosing a partner, try to choose a life experience and personality similar to yourself from the beginning. People can change in love, but the change is limited. Not a virgin suggestion: 1 find a decent virgin 2 find an introverted virgin 3 find a man who has been married twice 4 find a man older than himself 10 years old. In other cases, if you meet a playboy virgin, you will ruin your life.
Here are some ways to deal with new relationships after not being a virgin:
1 In this era, women say that they have hymens. What about men? How many men dare to clap their chests and say that they didn't find out until their wedding night?
Facing it with a complaining attitude will not help you personally. What era is it now? At present, China is an era in which traditional thoughts are the main theme and a variety of non-mainstream thoughts coexist.
Men with virginity complex are all men's ideas, and these men don't marry.
Today, through the online survey, we can still find that the proportion of China men who have a virgin complex is also 82.7% (including second marriage). Whether to get married or not is a passive evasive attitude and a misunderstanding of the virgin complex.
If he can't accept it, ask your boyfriend, are you a virgin?
This is a concept of comparing morality with each other. Losing one's virginity before marriage is immoral in traditional thought, but in almost all China's thoughts, losing one's virginity before marriage is not regarded as a noble character. Therefore, losing one's virginity before marriage is hovering near the moral bottom line of many people.
The man who really loves you won't care whether you are good or not, don't worry. There will naturally be men who love you and love you.
This sentence is true, but it is a passive attitude. Think about it, I have no advantage, I don't take the initiative, so I really have to wait.
The virgin plot is generally an immature boy, which is related to the mind. . .
A man may not have a virgin complex at the age of 40, and he may not care whether his wife has cheated at the age of 60, because he has no fighting and blood in his heart.