10 years old

I like literature since I was a child and I like earth-shattering legends. Primary school began to read folk stories, and junior high school read spoken magazines and poetry selections. My grandmother couldn't put it down when she saw me reading. She got me a library card in the province. I borrowed many novels to read in my spare time. I also like reading history books. In order to enrich my life between classes, I will tell my classmates my reading experience and experience at every class meeting to exercise my eloquence. Our class meeting will always be divided into several sections, and the last content is "Story Meeting". The implication is "Han Jian commented on the only number on the calendar". This Han Jian is me.

I started with Qin Shihuang and told her how she established the first unified feudal dynasty in the history of China, and then established the feudal monarchy system. I speak vividly. Since then, I have been the second teacher in my class. When talking about the Three Kingdoms, I began to have my own views instead of retelling history. According to my analysis, the historical events in China are composed of deception and traps, which has become a lesson for people now, just like today's mirror, constantly repeating false images and hypocrisy.

Lead brother

My grandmother died when I was three years old, and I moved from B city to S city with my parents. Xiao Lin is five years older than me. He is my brother who rented the rest of my house. Our family lived in the city museum, and his family was idle after grandma died. After her death, the property of the house belonged to her mother. Because the surrounding environment is quiet and downtown, Kobayashi's family of three came to S city from Jilin and looked around for temporary accommodation. Kobayashi was admitted to a key art college in S city that year. It is the most famous art university in the three northeastern provinces. Only people with excellent painting skills can go in. Kobayashi's parents work in the same unit, and the benefits of the enterprise are not good. Both of them were laid off, so they rented the house to others, took their son to S city, and rented grandma's house.

Kobayashi often draws sketches on sketchboards in the park. His parents work in S city and earn four years' college tuition for Xiao Lin. Life is so hard that they can barely eat three meals a day. Kobayashi took a part-time job at first. Giving painting lessons to students, my father found a temporary job in a pork processing factory, and my mother also worked as a dish washer in a hotel, so the family scrimped and saved. Sometimes I see Xiao Lin's father naked, the winter in the northeast is very cold, and Xiao Lin's father's cotton-padded clothes are covered with dirty mimeographs. Xiao Lin's eyes are always full of tears.

Kobayashi didn't live on campus because the accommodation in the Academy of Fine Arts was surprisingly expensive. Later, I learned that Kobayashi would cook a packet of instant noodles every day when he came back from school, and only eat half and leave half for his parents. Xiao Lin and I are on the first floor, but there are stairs in the middle. The aisle is narrow and messy. My mother knows that Xiaolin's family is not well-off, and often asks Xiaolin to go home for dinner. Brother Kobayashi and I gradually became friends who talked about everything. He never refused to talk to him about life because I was too young. I have regarded him as my own kind since I was a child.

15 years old

When I was in junior high school, I had a boyfriend named Chen Meng, who was one year older than me. He is a boy who likes joking and humor. I like being with him. I hardly have a girlfriend because I refuse to change myself. They all say I'm eccentric. I only have two best female friends in my life. They not only brought me friendship and care, but also enriched my heart. When I see their eyes, I will get a lot of encouragement and approval I can always find the guilt hidden in my uneven heart. When I grew up, I made many mistakes, but they still accommodated me in my heart. Forgive my mistake.

15 years old, never had intercourse with them in my life. There are many accidents in life. When two straight lines intersect, it is possible to collide with the spark of love, it is possible to have a huge disaster, and it is possible to achieve a brilliant life for each other. For me, the first half of my life is a warm, gentle, long-flowing, meaningful and fragrant friendship. It is inevitable to know pearls and brilliant blue. It is they who enlarge and spread our time and space little by little, and let me see many new things. At the age of 15, I had been in love with Chen Meng for a long time. At that time, I thought a good relationship was that someone would escort you home after school and do your homework together. So superficial. Chen Meng is a precocious boy, which brought me sexual enlightenment. Every month when I have a fit, he looks more thorough than me. If I do it, I should avoid a stomachache. Chen Meng and I have always had a good relationship, but the darkest time of my adolescence also happened at that time, which made my family lose face and my comrades-in-arms parted ways with this second friend. At that time, I regarded Brother Kobayashi as my first good friend.

Kobayashi often said that he had a shadow in his heart and his first girlfriend left her. People who don't know the shadow in their hearts, as a black joke, a bizarre irony farce in the world, secretly laugh at Brother Kobayashi. Because of internal injuries, sometimes the perineum will hinder a person's development and make a person gloomy and uncertain.

My junior high school English teacher turned out to be a female college student. Because the boy who was too gentle and naughty always let her down, she left in a fit of pique and changed the company. Next semester, he changed a pervert and made a lot of money for many girls. He is thirty years old and has no girlfriend, so his heart is empty. At first, he called several beautiful girls to the office. It's just that there are many mistakes in doing the problem. He is tutoring. But the girl blushed and tried to return to the classroom. A few days later, I called another girl to the office, but the girl ran out screaming and crying. No one knew what had happened, so I was called. He usually doesn't dare to criticize me publicly in class. Maybe I'm always cocky. I didn't say hello to the dean. Once I was late for the flag-raising ceremony and was criticized by name. My face is not red and I don't shake my head. He always seems helpless. He didn't call me until he couldn't stand it. I also heard many girls secretly say that he is a pure goat.

When I walked into his office without fear, he looked at me with bedroom eyes. After locking the door, he began to take off his pants and let me touch his penis. A stream of sour and bitter water squeezed out of the throat. I shouted, no, you rogue teacher. He covered my mouth against the wall and put his other hand into my underwear. I can't make any noise, but I feel pain under my body and slide from side to side like a snake. Finally, I kicked his penis with my leg strength. With a cry of "forbearance", I took the opportunity to open the door and ran out. Many boys saw that my belt was loose. I hurried home.

My parents were very angry when they learned about it. I can't wait to hit him. They went to school, but the teacher didn't admit it at first, saying that they just exchanged feelings with the students. He has done nothing wrong. When many girls sued him, the school began to deal with this serious problem. When I didn't know the result, my father transferred me to another school and didn't even have a chance to say goodbye to Chen Meng.

"The taste of success in the first compensation"

With the growth of age, things that have been insulted by teachers are a bit dim, but what I can't get rid of is that disgusting feeling. His image has long been transformed into a devil by me. After that, I didn't like any teachers, even after entering high school. In high school, another thing happened that made me lose face. The teacher made another article about me, but compared with the devil teacher, it was nothing at all.

When I was in high school, my brother Xiaolin was also a senior three. Faced with the problem of finding a job, he has to prepare a lot of work every day. He is drawing cartoons for a publication. He thinks my image is quite in line with the comic book protagonist. I have big watery eyes and a round face. Brother Kobayashi began to paint me and painted many portraits of me. Both form and spirit. One day the art teacher asked each of us to draw a self-portrait and hand it in as homework. I couldn't remember too much homework that day, and I didn't remember it until I handed it in. It happened that my mother knocked on the classroom door. When I went out, I saw that she brought me a portrait painted by Kobayashi's brother. She was afraid that I would be told by the teacher, winking at me and then telling the teacher that my child left his homework at home today, so I brought it.

After the teacher unfolded "My Works", his eyes lit up and he was very surprised. Then he said to the class, "Look at Han Jian's paintings." . Too level. After seeing the self-portrait, the students broke into sparse applause, because the painting was really good, but my popularity was average. The teacher said with a smile, Han Jian, although art class is not an important course, it is an important subject to mold a perfect mind and cultivate aesthetics. You should be my class representative. I will also hang your painting on the honor roll of the school, because you are the most talented student I have ever taught. I was speechless at once.

To this end, I practice painting hard every day and ask Xiao Lin if I have nothing to do, because I can't lose myself and don't want to see other people's disappointed eyes. I always strive for victory. My work really won many national awards in the future, all of which were won in high school.

Ideal glows in the distance.

When I was a sophomore, I began to contribute to major journals in my spare time. Many manuscripts sank into the sea, and I lost confidence. A series of disasters happened at home, and uncles and aunts died one after another, all because of accidents. Dad was laid off by the company, leaving only some technical backbones in the factory. Dad is depressed every day. It is even more difficult for him to go out to work without a diploma, so he set up a stall himself, that is, selling newspapers. My mother's unit also has to lay off employees, and she is on tenterhooks every day. If both of them are unemployed, the situation at home will be even worse. My mother always gives gifts to leaders on holidays and has a good relationship with them. Later, because her mother delayed her work at home, the leader gave her a bad look all day. The leader alienated the comrades and rarely called her when they got together. My mother's situation is very embarrassing, and everyone can see that this is not a good thing, there are hidden dangers.

My father began to scold my mother and accuse her of incompetence. My eyes are also anxious. My family may be in trouble and even dream of my mother's sad and helpless face. Fortunately, my uncle helped my family through the difficulties. My uncle runs a restaurant, which mainly deals in hot pot and barbecued pork dishes. He didn't have time to take care of it himself, so he wanted to leave it to his parents, because both of them had studied Korean food before and their skills were very good. What my uncle means is that it is not necessarily a bad thing that my parents are unemployed now. In order to survive, modern people should give full play to their strengths. The situation is too smooth to be a big deal. Although our living security has been broken now, we are trying to open a shop. In the future, we may be able to open a chain store. Tell my parents to be elated.

Since then, my father has been busy from morning till night, and my mother soon resigned and devoted herself to the operation of the restaurant with my father. Every move of my parents moved me. In order to cultivate me, they spent a lot of money to let me go to classes to make up lessons, because all the children didn't have Sundays at that time, and they gave up their holidays just to change for a bright future. Parents are eager for their children to succeed, and their time is almost overdrawn. My parents will naturally not have my free time when they see other parents working so hard. There are thick review questions waiting for me to do every day, and dozens of English words are waiting for me every day. First of all, when I can't do the problem, my mood will be particularly agitated. I don't know why I want to sue these things to fulfill my future. These things that have nothing to do with me will dominate my fate.

Although my parents often tell me that I don't miss my job, I still insist on contributing and expressing the world in my eyes. During the winter vacation, I wrote a short story and published it in an official magazine. It's about a boy's fantasies. He always peeks at different girls, mainly showing teenagers' sexual fantasies and mature characteristics, and describing a growing boy's personality characteristics from different angles. However, due to this article, many students are relatively distant from me, and my teachers hate my guts. They communicate with me alone and criticize and educate me. My parents punished me for not eating for three days. I brought a lot of controversy to the school and my family. I have never been scolded by others and insisted on my inner rebellious revolution. I later invented a word called loyalty, which showed my determination to defend myself. After that, his works were published one after another, and he began to use pen names, violent dancers, alternative beauties and so on. I have also sent many poems in my poetry magazine, all of which were written one night when I had a whim. I once traveled to a historic site and thought of a poem written here when the war swept the world hundreds of years ago. I also wrote poems based on my own grasp of words after reading a biography of a great man. Some poems were written in abstract language after I saw specific events. In short, all these poems are published in Poetry magazine.

After the third year of high school, we changed our head teacher, which was the most disastrous year. Later, many students failed to get into the undergraduate course, which was related to the experience of this year (some students didn't even get enough points in the vocational high school). The new teacher, surnamed Zhang, has small eyes and many red spots on his face. The old woman's bench was covered with gray-blue overalls and white sleeves. When she was in her forties, her son committed suicide and her husband died, which we later learned. She looked at us fiercely, as if someone owed her. She tells us every day that her homework is very tense. Teachers always emphasize that time is money, and our homework is very heavy. However, those six months were spent in her education. Oh, that's nice to say. It should be used to insult students. If a classmate fails in the exam, she will get a bonus, and she always says that if a classmate fails in the class, she will not be judged as an excellent teacher. I really don't know whether she is worried about the future of her students or her job. She didn't even let the girls go when she threw it. I saw her smash a heavy book on the head of a girl who usually has a good relationship with me. It is thought that the girl yelled at Tao in front of the whole class because he was rude. She tore up students' textbooks and exercise books like crazy. I was looking forward to Friday when I arrived on Monday. After class, some boys make a loud noise. She slapped the student in the face, and the boy said, my parents never hit me. Who are you? The boy took up his schoolbag and went home. Teacher Zhang struck the table like a madman and dropped the chalk at the same time.

After the storm, the headmaster had a meeting with our class, not asking for trouble, but ordering us to listen to Teacher Zhang, saying that the teacher treated us as her children. Soon the headmaster told us about Mr. Zhang's misfortune with tears in his eyes. At that time, we were all very moved and we reached a tacit understanding with the headmaster. Later, Mr. Zhang was still dissatisfied with our shy eyes. As soon as there was a noise in the classroom, Teacher Zhang suddenly came in, and she was severely punished in anger. I know someone is going to suffer. She said through her voice, who spoke just now? Didn't I tell you to be quiet in self-study? Everybody stand up. The words sound just fell and two men and three women stood up. They look scared. The teacher said that everyone should go out and stand in the corridor for three hours.

Facing my parents, I have never been so scared. I live carefully every day for fear of provoking her. I know there is a hard ice in her heart that won't melt. How can a person bear the great pain caused by the loss of a loved one? It is a continuous disaster that can't be broken after thousands of turns. The sharp pain after big waves and sand washing will remain in my heart. What kind of bitterness is the helplessness of the secular? This kind of taste, only you have tasted it yourself, can you deeply understand it.

I can't answer all the questions in the class under her intimidation. As I expected, my head was broken by her. Fortunately, I didn't hit my temple. Fortunately, there is not much blood. Blood fell on my eye hair. Through a drop of blood, I saw that her life was wrapped in blood and tears and stuck in her bones. I forgave her, and I wanted to let go of my broken life. I want to let go of my deformed personality. Afterwards, I read the words of anthomaniac. Anthomaniac is a female writer I like very much. She opened a beautiful, romantic and rich world for me. Reading her The Other Side of the World seems to have entered a gloomy and gloomy world. In this book, I forgot the boundaries of time. I grow like a flower, full of hope, and I don't know where to go.

There is no full text, only one paragraph.