I just hope that children can realize their impossible dreams and live a life they can't live; At the same time, there are also unspeakable hopes that children can bring changes and improvements to their lives.
Place your hopes for the future on your children. It's true, isn't it? This is the reality of China's parents, because they can't count on anything else, including themselves.
I really hate the idea that parents want their children to succeed and their daughters to succeed.
I think if a person wants something and works hard, why does he always pin his hopes on others?
Although he is his own child, he is also an independent individual. Children feel that the years are quiet, but parents want their children to fight for it.
In this world, family decides life, what parents are like, and children rarely soar.
I know I'm just an ordinary person with average ability, and I'm more prone to emotional frustration.
I think my life is like this, but my relatives think I should make progress and change. But all they need to do is shout slogans to annoy me, and they need to pay more than a few words for me.
I think I've done my best within my own scope. My parents asked me to take the exam, I took the accounting exam, I read books and worked overtime on weekends. But I will never be what they think, but I am really just an ordinary person.
Parents are the same all over the world. Who doesn't want their children to be happy and do something?
First, let's look at natural attributes. As a member of nature, people also have the instinct to protect their calves and children. For example, lions and tigers teach their children to hunt, and ducks teach ducklings to swim. These are basic survival skills. People are the same. Guide children to learn to survive and learn to develop.
Secondly, as experienced people, parents know that life and work are not easy, so they always instill the idea of hard work and forge ahead, hoping that their children will make greater achievements. Finally, some parents often pin their hopes for unfinished business on their children.
My children sometimes don't understand the poor family. I wish our next generation everything is better and they will all succeed.
1. Parents may have disappointments in the process of growing up, which can make up for their children's past mistakes.
2. The influence of people around parents. Especially if parents are surrounded by all kinds of outstanding successful people, parents will inevitably have the heart of comparison, which will put forward higher requirements for their children.
Every parent wants his children to thrive, boys to succeed and girls to succeed. Why does this expectation become a trend of the Chinese nation?
The Chinese nation has a traditional habit of respecting the old and loving the young since ancient times. There are also classic stories, such as hanging beam and stabbing stocks, and Kong Rong's 7-year-old Qin Li. All these reflect the Confucian tradition in China. There was a period in ancient China. This is a period in which Confucianism is dominant. At that time, it was called Fei Ru. Therefore, China's Confucianism has occupied the main vein of China's civilization history for many years, and respecting the old and loving the young is the essence of Confucianism.
Some parents say they want their children to succeed, while others say they want their children to succeed. I broke my heart for the children, but the result was the opposite. Why is there such a result?
First, the starting point of many parents is really for the sake of their children, hoping that their children will have a good future in the future, especially now that thousands of troops have crossed the wooden bridge and changed their lives through the college entrance examination, especially for those with family difficulties. In this way, parents will be strict with their children and call them ambitious children. However, children's nature determines that they may not fully listen to their parents' words, especially in the rebellious period of growing up, and the requirements for their parents are even more hostile to you, which makes parents feel very distressed and the hope of success is getting more and more slim.
Second, the dream of becoming a dragon is actually to fulfill the unfinished dream of parents. There are many parents who want their children to finish their unfinished business and hope that their children can do what they have not done. For example, if they fail in the college entrance examination, they hope their children can fulfill their long-cherished wish. If I didn't want to be a soldier in the past, I want my children to be a soldier now. When these parents want to fulfill their long-cherished wish, they simply don't consider the children's own situation and feelings, so in fact, parents are thinking for themselves. Hoping for success is just a rhetoric. They want to accomplish some of their dreams, wishes and unattainable things through their children. Now that the child has grown up, treat the child as a copy of himself, so that he can accomplish anything he didn't accomplish in the past and didn't achieve his goal.
The third is the psychology of comparison. If all the children around you are admitted to Tsinghua Peking University or other schools, parents may ask their children to reach the same learning level as these children. And if many children around you go abroad to study, and some go out when they are very young, then parents will follow suit and send their children abroad. It felt good to be sent abroad before, but this epidemic has brought very, very big trouble. Many children have encountered many unknown difficulties and problems in the process of returning to China for asylum, and there are also many headaches. Therefore, the so-called ambition of parents is actually to realize their own comparison psychology, thinking that what others can do, our children should do it, which is actually an invisible pressure on children.
Quality education has been advocated for many years. What is quality education? The so-called quality education is to give full play to children's innate interest in learning, hobbies and future interests according to their specialties, so that children can study happily, work carefree and enjoy life at work. Therefore, parents must treat their children scientifically in the process of expecting success, and don't blindly follow the trend, let alone blindly compare, so that our children can thrive in a happy atmosphere.
Sima Qian said: "All ancestors in history wanted to build their own descendants. However, if you can really stand up, it is fresh! " Hoping success is a bait to lure parents to invest in their children, and it is also the expectation and dream of most parents. There are also many successful precedents in history. But it must be very few, and the average person can't reach it!
Now "Don't let children lose at the starting line" is the mantra of educational institutions, and its intention is not poisonous! Its purpose is nothing more than to let parents enroll their children in various after-school remedial classes, thus benefiting a lot. In fact, parents are the real starting line for children. Like father, like son, what kind of parents make what kind of children. Although there are also successful and outstanding grassroots children. However, no matter what conditions, their parents must have high IQ and superhuman knowledge, make considerable efforts and master the scientific way of parenting. Cultivate children to master scientific learning methods and develop good study habits. The most important thing for children to grow up is to develop their potential, cultivate habits and temper their will.
Graduated from rural junior high school and joined the work at the age of 2/kloc-0. Having children after marriage, I made a way for my children to grow up in infancy. Use various methods to develop children's potential in time. Children appear smarter and more mature than their peers from primary school. Junior high school and senior high school are both in key middle schools in the district, and their study is not the best, but football, basketball, billiards, gobang, Go and games are all first-class among their classmates. After studying abroad at my own expense, I took the actuary certification examination in North America in 2005. More than 30,000 candidates, 6,400 people tried once. My child passed three exams at the same time. There are only nine applicants with more than 30,000 applicants, and they were hired by American companies before graduation. (View Online) After the manager of the medical department of the world's largest reinsurance company resigned, he ran a three-dimensional scanning company across the border and cooperated with Tsui Hark, Yuan Heping, Jackie Chan, Zhang Yimou and other big bowls. His character is well-known in the industry. "Integrity, the knot of the world!" All the contacts are CEOs of listed companies and successful people.
The philosopher Nietzsche has superman's point of view:
"The existence of our sentient beings doesn't make much sense. If it makes sense, there will be a superman from an ordinary family, but no one knows which family this superman will come from. "
In China, the expression is "I hope my son will succeed, and I hope my daughter will succeed". Everyone in China knows what "dragon" means. Is to be emperor and queen. The man who can be a dragon wind is superman.
Although it is a small probability event, the success rate is only one in ten million and one in one hundred million. The general public all hope to plant dragon seeds and finally harvest snakes, fish, shrimps and loaches, but everyone will never give up and pursue them from generation to generation.
I hope my children will do it for me in the future if my ideal is not realized. Parents want their children to honor their ancestors, just to regret what they can't do in this life.
Parents can buy high-priced school districts for their children to enter good schools; Let children enter private schools at high prices; Parents go to the city to buy a house or stay with them all the time ... parents work hard for their children!
"I didn't go to college that year, knowing that it is difficult to move without education. Going to college is an unfulfilled dream, and I can't let my children make the same mistakes. " Many external pressures, deviating from interest, make children prone to school weariness, and the effect is often counterproductive. Don't respect the law of students' growth, just rote learning and forced indoctrination. The education of children should see the situation clearly. "Above middle-aged people, you can speak orally, and below middle-aged people, you can't speak orally."
A friend of mine comes from a superior family. The husband and wife have a good job and a high income, and they are the only children in the family. My father is an easy-going and natural way of education. My mother is very strict, even a little harsh. Every time we get together to play, men walk alone. We asked, "What about my wife and children?" They all replied, "At home, her mother is watching her study". The girl was not admitted to her mother's ideal university, so she contacted the school to let her daughter repeat one year. On the first day of school, her daughter jumped off the high building of the school ... Later, the couple divorced, and her mother was nearly 50 years old. Even if she remarries, she can't have children of her own. How tragic.
The child asked, "Why study hard?" You can find a good job in the future. Then why is your own career so bad? Because I didn't study hard. Then why didn't you study hard at first? Because nobody told me. Would you study hard if someone told you? Yes, are you kidding a ghost? Did you really convince the child? He is just a fledgling man, temporarily at your mercy, but his heart is like a mirror, and it is you who deceive yourself.
Good parents can at least provide:
At least for a long time, you can be a role model for children. You are beyond the average person's knowledge and vision, let him learn and imitate unconsciously, and form excellent habits that successful people generally need.
Aren't these years full of fighting for dad? Everyone is disgusted and shouting for "fairness", but have you really seen this thing? We must have a correct understanding of "Fighting Dad". Fighting dad can help children grow up better. Why abandon it?
Isn't there a very inspirational saying? I have no chance to be a rich second generation, but I want my children to be rich second generation. Why let a child become a rich second generation is to give him more resources and let him stand on a higher shoulder.
We all know what the real world is like. Whether we are fair or not, we just want to get some benefits for ourselves or our group. If you still want your child to have a bright future, it is better to do it yourself than to expect your child to succeed. Is it more convincing to educate children like this?
Because of confidence! ! !
Most people think that their personality is not perfect, but it is also great! I don't think my things are the best, but they are also very good. Anyway, I think mine is good.
Based on this psychology, for children, it is actually your favorite product! Of course I think, "My son will be extraordinary, and my son must be ~ ~ ~"
This is why parents want their children to succeed! In fact, it is also a kind of self-deception! Imagine how many people can really become "Jackie Chan"? What will Jackie Chan experience? None of these parents thought about it! !
If you really don't experience wind and rain, it will easily become a "dragon", and there will be no dragons in the world!
My suggestion is: let children be themselves and become the "dragon" in their hearts!
No matter what reasons parents have, one thing is that parents themselves are not lucky! So I hope the children.
I just hope that children can realize their impossible dreams and live a life they can't live; At the same time, there are also unspeakable hopes that children can bring changes and improvements to their lives.
Place your hopes for the future on your children. It's true, isn't it? This is the reality of China's parents, because they can't count on anything else, including themselves.