"Who didn't meet a few scum when he was young?" Many sisters who are frustrated in love like to tease themselves with this sentence, but they don't know that many love rat are proficient in PUA. The so-called PUA, Pick-up Artist, was originally used to help people with social barriers build social confidence, help people with emotional barriers communicate, and get love and be loved. But after some men with ulterior motives used it as a means of emotional deception, girls were hurt emotionally. In fact, as long as we know love rat ·PUA's words and routines, let him be crafty and determined not to fall for it!
Phase 1: packer design
The first step for love rat to implement PUA is to package its own personal design, such as Gao Fushuai's personal design: open their circle of friends, and you will find that they drive luxury cars with famous watches, often go to various high-end places and travel everywhere at home and abroad. ...
For example, for sports men, the daily entertainment of friends circle is either running, playing ball or surfing and rock climbing. ...
These fake photos are used to create images that girls like and attract their attention. In addition to the above two personal settings, such as the white-collar elite who love coffee (never eat dinner), the rich second generation who have mines at home (but have no pocket money), and the entrepreneurs who have just started their careers (but the funds can't be turned around occasionally), it is also a relatively popular and commonly used personal setting for PUA.
Stage 2: False experience, subverting people's design
When love rat has contacted you in various ways, and you have completely believed in his personal design, he will fabricate a false experience to subvert his previous personal design. For example, I'm not as sunny as I look, I've been hurt by fatal feelings, and I'm unlucky to come from a family. The purpose is to show his fragility and helplessness in front of you, to stimulate the motherhood of girls and to save him.
This scene is very common in Wei Xiaobao, the hero of Jin Yong's novels: I used to be such an asshole. I grew up in a brothel without my parents. Now I want to work hard and turn over a new leaf, which can arouse the heroine's desire for protection in an instant.
The third stage: establishing relationships and contracts.
When you are completely attracted to love rat, fascinated by him and feel pity for him, he will induce you to confess to him. For example, I will ask you, "Why do you care so much about me?"
You will start to think, "am I in love with him, or why should I care about him?"
At this time, love rat has used words to make you think that you are a positive party. In fact, he is slowly controlling your spirit, inducing girls, establishing a relationship with him, and getting a bargain to make girls make a commitment to him.
Stage 4: Destroy self-esteem and mind control.
20 19 10 9 Peking University girl Bao Li committed suicide by taking drugs and finally passed away. As a junior in Peking University Law School, she had an infinitely bright future, but her boyfriend Mou denied the value with her "virgin complex", and then she was subjected to verbal violence and cold violence. The guilt she used developed into a more excessive "let him call his master", call him a dog, and let him write "I am Mu Linhan's dog" on her body.
In the final stage, advanced PUA is actually a kind of mind control. Once love rat finds that there is something that doesn't meet his expectations, he will find all kinds of reasons to magnify it infinitely, blame you, make you feel inferior, be unwilling, regret, and gradually destroy your self-esteem. Using this psychology, love rat can be uncompromising in front of you, thus psychologically suppressing each other.
In fact, PUA's routine in love rat is not so brilliant, but why are so many girls cheated one after another? In fact, we will find that love rat mostly chooses the same type of girls as the victims-good girls. For example, Bao Li, a girl from Peking University in the article, is a typical well-behaved girl. She was born in a businessman's family and has a sensible and well-behaved personality. She was taken care of by her parents since childhood.
Why did the "good girl" become the hardest hit area of PUA? Because good girls' self-confidence comes from the value recognition of others and society, they are used to pleasing their parents' recognition and eager for teachers' praise. When a good girl can't meet love rat's requirements, she will fall into the psychology of guilt and self-blame, and feel that she owes each other, even if she sacrifices herself, she will make compensation, so she will be slaughtered.
When we are familiar with love rat's PUA games, we don't have to be afraid of their brainwashing control and refuse to be a "good girl" trampled by others. Love rat is not easy to attack the "bad girl" in their eyes, because the "bad girl" is independent, will not easily doubt themselves, and will not be easily brainwashed and controlled by love rat.
How to be an independent "bad girl" First of all, we should throw away the definitions and labels given to us by this society. A good girl is not virtuous and sensible, gentle and patient, but a girl with independent economic thinking, principles, temper and ability to defend rights, which is even more admirable.
What's wrong with being a "bad girl"? Excessive dependence and obedience to others will only make us lose the initiative to speak, so we must first be financially independent, which is the most basic condition for a person to be independent. At the same time, you need to have your own life, your own circle, your own friends and your own job. You can't give up your circle of friends and career just because of love rat's words, so as to be independent. On the principle of right and wrong, we have our own bottom line and judgment. At the same time, independent girls should have their own ideals, stick to their ideals and affirm their value. Only in this way will they become more and more confident, and these qualities will become your armor and will never be easily hurt by others.
Every girl has her own bright spot and value. No matter whether we are sensible, sound and smart, no matter whether people around us recognize us, we are no longer influenced by other people's comments. We have our own value cognition system. When we meet PUA· love rat, be a "bad girl" and say goodbye bravely!
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