Once, I met a mother who wouldn't let her half-year-old child eat her hands. In a room of more than 20 degrees, when everyone was wearing one or two T-shirts, she wrapped the child in a jumpsuit with cotton cloth and velvet and a pair of cotton shoes on her feet. I asked, is your child sweating on his back? She said sweating. I asked if sweating on my back was heat. Why not cut down on clothes? Children are easy to get sick when they are covered with heat. It is normal for children to eat their hands, which proves that children are developing normally. She is learning about her body, and her hand-eye coordination and brain cognition are also developing. The mother smiled and said, I just won't let her eat her hands, making her drool and get a rash. Children are too young to wear less clothes. Later, my husband said, I used to feel sorry for children, because they were too young to talk, and they only cried when they were uncomfortable or afraid, which was particularly helpless. Seeing such parents now, I feel that their children are pitiful and adults have too many restrictions. Even when they grow up, their words can't be understood and accepted by their parents. Really helpless.
In our inherent concept, we think that children are a blank sheet of paper, and adults can draw without drawing, so that children can grow in the direction we expect. What is 2.8 meters tall and weighs 800 Jin? Raising children is so simple, why not raise pigs? Then a curly hair told us that it was 20 19 years ago. Do you still believe that a child is a blank sheet of paper? This curly hair said in his book Whiteboard:
Who is this curly hair? This curly hair is Steven Pinker, Ph.D. in experimental psychology at Harvard University, head of the Cognitive Neurology Center at MIT, and the most influential person in the world selected by Time magazine.
More and more research shows that we should respect the law of children's development, not our blank theory, to raise our children arrogantly. From the perspective of brain science, Sandra Aamodt, Ph.D. in Neuroscience at the University of Rochester, postdoctoral fellow in Neuroscience at Yale University and former editor-in-chief of Nature Neuroscience, wrote in the first chapter of the Open Handbook for Children's Brain:
Therefore, we don't know how many clothes a child needs to wear. We can add and subtract one piece from the mother's clothes according to the dress rules, whether the child's chest and back are warm, and return the child's growth to ourselves. Parenting is a lifelong career, especially in our society, where mothers bear too many responsibilities. If we only love children, but we don't have the ability to love them, and we can't give them a "good enough" environment for independent growth, it will be a great pity for parents and a great loss for children, because time is costly, and life cannot be repeated in one direction. At the beginning of children's family education, we can understand the unique beauty of every life, see children and find them. From the place where I need children to develop, to say the least, I will observe children closely, discover their characteristics, guide them to grow up, let go of control, be stubborn, wait, endure the most difficult things and grow up with them. You will find this is endless fun.