In fact, it is a big mistake for parents to do so. Even if children are very young, children have self-esteem, especially boys. They care about face, regardless of their age. If parents always talk about their children's shortcomings and bad things, their self-esteem will be hurt slowly, which is not good for their physical and mental development.
Last time I talked about that particularly "lively" boy in charge. Some time ago, he didn't talk to his mother for a long time, and he always opposed his parents at home. His parents didn't go to the cram school he signed up for. He used to greet people, but now he is always angry. I am very curious about why the child will become like this. I talked about it when I met the leader downstairs that day. In the process of chatting with neighbors, it seems that neighbors are always belittling their children intentionally or unintentionally.
"He doesn't learn anything like others, and he is worried to death." "I can't learn, I can't even do sports well, and I can't do anything." "Compared with my sister's children, one is in the sky and the other is underground." The protagonist and his wife always say such things. I seem to suddenly understand why the child has become like this. No one can stand it. In the long run, it is disrespectful and demeaning.
Parents always think that children don't understand, and children don't care about their own opinions and ideas, which leads to children becoming more and more rebellious. What parents don't know is that this practice will leave a mark on their children's hearts and ultimately affect their future growth.
Parents should pay attention to the fact that these three bottom lines must not be touched when educating boys, which will easily cause children to lose confidence in themselves, and children will give up on themselves and never listen to their parents' teaching and guidance again.
When educating children, especially boys, these bottom lines must never be touched.
1. Criticize children in front of many people
It is important not to criticize children in front of outsiders when educating them. As the saying goes, wash your dirty linen in public. When criticizing a child in front of many people, it will make the child feel humiliated and ashamed, and it will also affect the child's self-esteem and feel humiliated. The child feels that everyone is watching his jokes and feels embarrassed, which will leave a profound impact on the child. Even after a long time, when children see these people at that time, they always feel that everyone is laughing at him, which will lead them to become decadent and indifferent to other people's feelings and opinions, and it is easy for them to go astray.
2. Always repeat your child's mistakes.
Some parents are always willing to turn over their children's old accounts and are always talking about their children's mistakes. Children have realized their mistakes and corrected them, but parents are always nagging. In fact, children hate their parents' practice, because once parents mention it, it is equivalent to exposing their children's scars. Over time, children will become impatient and even deliberately oppose their families. This kind of education has an impact on children.
3. Habitually deny children's ideas
"Children don't know anything!" "Children don't understand, they are too young!" This is what many parents often say to their children. In fact, children began to have relatively independent thoughts at the age of two. At this time, children are eager to express their thoughts and positions to their parents. However, if parents are always impatient, children will think that they have not been respected and valued, resulting in children not taking the initiative to put forward their own ideas and opinions.
If some parents think that their children are particularly lively and kind when they are young, but when they grow up, their children become quiet, it is actually because of this practice of parents. Especially for boys, parents' affirmation and positive encouragement are needed, and children should not always be denied and attacked.
Parents don't know how to educate their children from the beginning. They always have to learn slowly and sum up their experience. Try to guide or distinguish children correctly, so that children can get correct training when they are young. So don't touch the above three items, otherwise it will not only affect the growth of children, but also make the family relationship between children and parents drift away, which is not worth the candle.