In ancient times, it was to improve social morality, stabilize social family relations and improve people's quality. The third obedience is' don't marry from the father, marry from the husband, and the husband will die from the child'. The four virtues are' female virtue, female words, female appearance and female workers' (female virtue, female words, female courtesy and female workers).
According to the different positions and division of labor between men and women at home and abroad
"Being different inside and outside" is the most important norm for both sexes in traditional society. Show in:
(1) The position and division of labor are "men outside the home"-men are engaged in politics, war, service, farming, hunting, commerce, etc. Women, on the other hand, are "in charge of housework such as food and wine", engaged in weaving silkworms, having children and honoring their in-laws. In the upper class, "diplomacy" refers to presiding over and participating in political affairs and military affairs (also known as "official duties" and "major events"), which is the privilege of male aristocratic bureaucrats, and women are not allowed to get involved. It is a violation of "the hen crows, which is ominous for the country". At the lower level, the typical division of labor of small farmers in farming society is male ploughing and female weaving (such as the legend of cowherd and weaver girl). This division and division of labor between men and women has formed internal and external barriers in daily life, such as "men dominate outside, women dominate inside", "men and women don't kiss", "don't talk inside, don't talk outside" and so on.
(2) The distinction between the inside and outside of the family organization is just the opposite of the difference in position and division of labor, that is, the man is in charge and the woman is outside (see Inside and Outside Marriage and Family).
"Inside" and "Outside" of Marriage and Family
Family is the most important organizational form of gender relations, and marriage is the means and process of forming a family.
The principle of forming a marriage and family is that men belong to the inside and women belong to the outside-for the purpose of "benefiting the inside", in order to facilitate the male family to carry on the family line and be harmonious and prosperous. The woman's relatives are called "consorts" and say that the daughter is an "outsider", which comes from this.
The custom of marriage and family system is that men are masters and women are slaves-monogamy and concubinage are practiced. Its practice is that men get married and have children (especially sons who must be born by themselves) in order to carry on the family line; A married woman must live in her husband's house, and the status of family members depends on her husband's seniority. The number of husband and wife is not balanced, and it is stipulated that men in the upper class can marry several concubines in addition to a positive (direct) wife (commonly known as "the first wife"). For example, the etiquette of the Zhou Dynasty stipulated that the emperor married 12 women at a time, and the number of vassals was nine, while the number of doctors was reduced. The Qin dynasty began to stipulate the number of concubines, and the number of concubines in three palaces and six courtyards was seventy-two, but emperors in previous dynasties often broke through, with three thousand beauties and tens of thousands of maids. Bureaucrats also have the privilege of concubinage. Civilians restricted concubinage, and the Ming dynasty stipulated that concubinage was allowed only when people over 40 had no children.
There are other origins and influences inside and outside.
It is expressly stipulated that "the difference between inside and outside" began in the Western Zhou Dynasty. The Zhou Dynasty destroyed the Shang Dynasty and established the first system civilization ruled by blood nobles, including the eldest son inheritance system and the enfeoffment system, which was called "Zhou Gong Li" in history. The distribution and inheritance of power need to determine the marriage and family system with aristocratic children as the organizational guarantee, divide the division of labor between men and women to exclude women from participating in political and military activities (in Shang Dynasty, there were records of wives and concubines leading troops in wars, presiding over sacrifices and farming), and urging women to return home. There are other systems and customs formed inside and outside men and women.
The difference between inside and outside is not "separation" and "separation", but that men's external space and responsibilities are infinite, open, important and have development potential, while women's internal space is limited, closed, circular and degraded. Marriage and family are also internal (male) and external (female). Men are masters and women are followers. "Being different inside and outside" has become the basis of a series of rules and regulations, such as maintaining paternalism and determining women's "three obedience and four virtues". It is also the basis for men to be superior to women for thousands of years and the foundation for its continuation.
Definition, Origin and Development of "Three Obediences and Four Virtues"
"Three Obediences and Four Virtues" is a normative requirement put forward by Confucian ethics for women's morality, behavior and self-cultivation all their lives in order to adapt to the stability of patriarchal clan system and safeguard the interests of patriarchal clan system-in-law (ethnic group), according to the principles of "different inside and outside" and "men are superior to women".
The word "three obedience" first appeared in the Confucian classic "Yili? When discussing the number of years of mourning for a married woman (three years for her husband and one year for her father), The Story of Mourning-Xia Zi said that "women have the meaning of' three obedience' and have no way of' special use', so they don't marry their father, but marry their husband and die". As daughters, wives and mothers, women should obey men. But women have been obedient for a long time, and the word "female" is the image of bending down and kneeling in Oracle Bone Inscriptions in Shang Dynasty (display font); There are hexagrams in the Book of Changes, which advocate that women obey and be single-minded and always serve their husbands. Later, women were asked to be martyred and chaste, and widows were restricted from remarrying.
The word "four virtues" can be found in Zhou Li? Celestial officer? Neizai is the official position of teaching harem women, and is responsible for teaching harem women "lewdness" and "women's duties" step by step. Among them, the "ninth wife" with higher status is "in charge of the law of women's studies to teach nine women to speak, look and be virtuous." It was originally a category of court women's education, and later it was called "three obedience", which became the standard of women's morality, behavior, ability and cultivation, that is, "three obedience and four virtues"
"Three Obediences" and "Unmarried Obedience"
The morality of "three obedience" has evolved from mourning system to interpersonal domination and obedience, which corresponds to the "three cardinal guides" advocated by the Han Dynasty-"the father is the child's guide" and "the husband is the wife's guide", which is extended to the relationship between men and women.
"Obey" has multiple meanings-obey, follow, obey and follow. Women who are required to abide by the morality of "three obedience" cannot be independent, but must act according to their father's orders, their husbands' orders and their sons' wishes, so as to be filial to women, virtuous to their wives and kind to their mothers.
"Obeying the father without marriage" means asking the unmarried "housemaid" to listen to their parents, and "not disobeying their father's orders" means "filial piety" (according to Confucius' explanation, "pro" refers to parents, but also "filial piety"); Daughter filial piety, in addition to taking care of daily life, but also to stand up when her father is in danger. For example, Emperor Wendi of the Western Han Dynasty persuaded Wendi to abolish corporal punishment, and her father was spared from sin. In the Eastern Han Dynasty, Cao E drowned to save his father from drowning (there is a "Cao E Monument" in history to commend Cao E's filial piety). Obeying "parents' orders" in lifelong marriage is also a manifestation of "obedience" and filial piety.
"Married and married again"
"Marrying a husband" means asking a married woman to be a wife and follow, obey and follow her husband. "Being a husband" begins with a woman's marriage, and the ceremony of marriage is "handsome men and beautiful women, women follow men, and the meaning of husband and wife begins from now on"; The mother told her daughter that "it doesn't violate the master." When you go to your husband's family, you get kinship terms (such as daughter-in-law, sister-in-law, aunt, sister-in-law, etc. ) according to your husband's seniority and age. The wife regards her husband as "heaven", "destiny cannot escape, and husband's life cannot be violated". She must obey and respect her husband, who will sing with her. For example, Wan (Sound Bowl) given to her husband by Meng Guang in the Han Dynasty was praised as "being polite". Wives and wives also need to perform filial piety on behalf of their husbands, serve the daily life of their in-laws, and have children for their husbands; Since the Song Dynasty, "nurturing husband and educating children" has become the most important duty of women. "Being a husband" means being loyal to her husband and keeping chastity. After her husband died, she didn't serve him or even become a martyr. In the Spring and Autumn Period, her husband was captured by the State of Chu, and the King of Chu forced her to be his wife. She died unsatisfied and became a model for history books to praise chastity. The official recognition of chastity in past dynasties has become a system, which has led to some women's self-mutilation. Even before her husband was about to die of illness and death, wives and concubines died early to show their loyalty to her husband.
"the husband dies and the son follows"
Among the "three obedience", only "the husband follows the son" is puzzling, because there is a tradition of "respecting the mother and filial piety" in Confucian ethics, and the mother has considerable power over her son. However, the ethical code also stipulates: "A woman should follow her father and brother when she is young, marry her husband, and follow her husband when she dies." (The Book of Rites? "suburban special sacrifice" here means "obeying its laws", which means that everything is decided by the father, husband and son. For the widow of her late husband, "Suizi" is an extension of "Suifu". She not only wants to keep her marriage, but also tries to raise her son, who is the head of the family and is in charge of important things. During the Spring and Autumn Period, a widow in Lu had nine sons. After the sacrifice at the end of the year, she wants to visit her parents' home. According to the etiquette of "the husband dies and the son succeeds", she needs the consent of her sons. After calling her son to get a promise, she asked her nine daughters-in-law to watch the door and said she would come back at night. As a result, I went home before dark, and waited outside the door until it was dark. I was seen by Dr. Lu and praised her for keeping the ceremony. Jiang Ye, the aunt of Confucius, is a model widow. She always acts according to the ceremony. Her husband and son died one after another. She cried early as a husband and late as a son, which was praised by Confucius as "knowing ceremony".
"four virtues"
The "Four Virtues" were originally the cultivation and accomplishment of the four necessary qualities of court women-morality, speech, tolerance and skill, which included the four traditional educational contents of "women's studies", so Confucianism called it "four teachings" and also called "four lines". Originated from the education of women in the court, it belongs to "Yin Li" (the etiquette that women abide by) and "Yin Duty" (the responsibility that women bear), and soon expanded to the upper-class families to undertake the cultivation of women's roles. When the girl was ten years old, she was educated by a female teacher at home-teaching "gentle delivery, obedience" (morality, speech, forbearance, pliancy and obedience), holding hemp (spinning hemp thread, ancient clothes were mostly hemp, ge and silk), treating silkworm cocoons, weaving and making clothes, and learning a series of jobs (work, weaving, sewing and preparation) three months before marriage. After the training is completed, a sacrificial ceremony will be held to make the woman obedient. It can be seen that "four virtues" serve the morality of "three obedience". The "four virtues" were later summarized as requirements for all women. According to Zheng Xuan's explanation, "women's virtue is chastity, women's words are rhetoric, women's capacity is gentle delivery, and women's work is diaosi." Later generations have been making new explanations.
"Women's Virtue"
Women's virtue is the most important one in women's education, and Zheng Xuan's chastity obedience is the core of women's virtue. "Chastity" means sticking to chastity, keeping a clean body and being loyal to her husband. "Shun" means "obedience and obedience" in the Book of Rites, and it is polite to in-laws, husbands and even family members. Ban Zhao, a female educator in the Han Dynasty, especially pointed out in "Women's Virtue" that "women don't have to be unique" (meaning that they don't have to have special talents, which is the original basis of the catchphrase "Women without talents are virtuous" in the Ming Dynasty), and "the method of being quiet, chaste, ashamed and athletic" means having women's virtue. Ban Zhao pays more attention to the cultivation of women's moral quality. By the end of the Qing Dynasty, the standard of "women's morality" was more specific and detailed, and there were detailed norms for women in different situations and roles: as wives, husbands and uncles (in-laws) should be obedient and gentle, and as wives, they should "get rid of jealousy" and help their husbands take concubines; As a mother, you should be able to "teach your son" and "be kind to your stepmother"; When you get along with your family, you should "get along with your uncle and sister (brother-in-law and sister-in-law)" and "get along in harmony". If the family is poor, it must be "poor", rich and frugal. It also includes "respect for the body", "loyalty", "chastity" and "revenge" ... with a series of virtues.
Women's words
The provision of female words in the ethical code was originally for "speaking at home" (articulate women will subvert the country) "The Book of Songs? In "Elegance", after scolding Zhou Youwang, he praised "a woman has a long tongue, and she is the only one" (a gossip is the chief culprit of national subjugation). However, speaking is also a necessary accomplishment and skill. Zheng Xuan's explanation of "women's talk" is "rhetoric", which means being good at coping and speaking appropriately. Ban Zhao thinks that "women's words" don't need to be glib and eloquent, just consider whether the words are appropriate, don't hurt people with ugly words, don't grab words, don't say more, and don't be annoying. If a big family hates women, it will sow discord among family members, and a talkative woman will be punished, which constitutes one of the "seven extinctions". Lan Dingyuan's "Women's Studies" gave concrete and positive guidance to "women's words", saying that "women's words are not expensive, but expensive (appropriate)". Various occasions need different appropriate words, such as encouraging husbands, teaching children, euphemistically advising, being conscientious, showing wisdom, avoiding disasters and so on. Therefore, "women's words" need the cultivation of wisdom and knowledge.
Women's ability
Confucianism has special standards for women's appearance modification. Confucius advocated valuing virtue over color, and asked her husband to be "virtuous and easy to change color" because he valued his wife's character rather than beauty. The requirement for women's appearance is to emphasize simplicity and decoration, while "smelting capacity" is close to "teaching prostitution" (deliberately dressing up is equal to tempting men's temperament desire). Zheng Xuan's explanation of women's appearance is "elegant delivery", which means gentle expression. Ban Zhao believes that women's appearance does not mean beautiful colors, but in daily life, for women's appearance, "washing away dirt, wearing fresh and clean, taking a bath in time, not dirty and not insulting"-that is, diligent in sweeping the floor, neatly dressed, taking a bath on time, paying attention to hygiene, is in line with women's appearance standards. Lan Dingyuan's requirements for women's appearance focus on the practicality of different occasions, such as "women's appearance should be dignified and respectful, children should be gentle and respectful", "respect for husband", etc., when pregnant, dignified and restrained when mourning, calm and tolerant when avoiding chaos, and die hard when necessary.
Work undertaken by women
The "women workers" in the four virtues of women's studies refer to the labor and work that women are engaged in. The gender division of labor is that the male is the master and the female is the master, so the standard of "female worker" has not changed much for thousands of years-picking mulberry and sericulture, spinning and weaving, feeding and preparing wine pulp in the process of doing business; I have to support my in-laws and husband, have children and entertain guests; There is also the important work of preparing sacrificial supplies and assisting sacrificial ceremonies. Ban Zhao believes that "women's work does not need skills" and "it is not funny to concentrate on spinning performance; Eating and drinking to entertain guests is called a woman's job. " However, for family needs, smart wives have always been praised, while "lazy" and "stupid" women are the objects of condemnation and ridicule. Lan Dingyuan also divided the order and purpose, saying, "Women workers should weave silkworms first and then feed them; In fact, women's contribution to women is not only an important guarantee for family continuity, but also an important source of national tax revenue in past dynasties. In ancient times, there was an idiom "A woman who doesn't cultivate the world is hungry, and a woman who doesn't weave the world is cold". This idiom came from Han Shu? "Food Record" pointed out that women work during the day and collect at night, which is equivalent to 45 working days per month, which is harder than men.
Overview of "Three Obediences and Four Virtues"
With regard to "three obedience and four virtues", we should first see that these requirements and norms for women came into being in a specific era, out of a certain need, and also changed with the changes of society. After the establishment of patriarchal marriage and family in the Zhou Dynasty and the clear boundaries between men and women, there appeared a moral code of "three obedience" that required women to obey their fathers, husbands and children, that is, the female role in the family was subordinate to men. "Four virtues" are the etiquette, manners and operational skills that women must have to practice the moral goal of "three obedience", that is, women should be obedient and capable. The "virtue" of traditional women under the influence of Confucian culture is gradually disciplined through the interaction of "three obedience" morality, "four virtue" cultivation and "seven out" rules and regulations. With the passage of time, the control of male power over women has gradually given way to that of the husband, whose interests are higher than that of the father's, who emphasizes obedience, silence and sacrifice to women, and the rules and regulations are more detailed and complicated, and women pay more for it. But it should also be noted that "three obedience and four virtues" is full of contradictions under the overall cultural framework of Confucianism. For example, when emphasizing "obedience from the father", we should also obey the mother; It is emphasized that as a husband, a wife is also "equal to her husband." Especially the promotion of "filial piety culture", the filial piety of sons to their mothers, especially widowed mothers, is unique in China. As for the "four virtues", if we can change into new content of the times today (for example, "virtue" focuses on civility and politeness, "speech" and "merit" focus on the cultivation of talent and creativity, and "capacity" focuses on proper decoration without deliberate makeup and beauty, etc. ), we can also learn from it.
Definition and origin of the seven laws
The word "seven Chu" originated in the Han Dynasty, and the earliest document that can be seen at present is Da Dai? The core monuments of life are called "seven walks" and "seven abandons". It is said that "women have' seven walks': rebellious parents (in-laws here); No children, go; Yin, go; Be jealous, go; If you are seriously ill, go; Say one more word and go; Steal, go. " It also explains that disobedient parents, because they are rebellious, childless, promiscuous, jealous and disorderly, have bad diseases that cannot be shared (preparing sacrifices), talk too much about their separation, and take stealing as the antonym. However, the phenomenon of becoming a wife has existed for a long time. In the pre-Qin period, women were called "returning" when they got married and divorced, and also called "returning" when they divorced, and divorced women were called "abandoning their wives". The "seven marriages" put forward in the Han Dynasty are related to the "five non-marriages" (incestuous families, rebellious families, daughters of families who were punished and suffered from bad diseases in the previous generation, and eldest daughters without mothers). In this way, we have kept two barriers to marriage. In the Tang dynasty, the "seven outings" rule was written into the law. When you can't go out and abandon your wife casually, you will be interfered by the law; And the order of the seven out was changed to "childless, promiscuous, disobedient to aunt (in-laws), talking, stealing, jealousy, and malignant disease." The Qing law was changed to "childless, ignorant, dissolute, jealous, abusive, talkative, stealing"; For a woman who commits adultery, there is no contingency of "three noes". The change of the order of "seven endings" reflects the different standards required of women in different times.
Bad parents
The establishment of a patriarchal family is mainly to safeguard the dignity and interests of parents, and marrying a daughter-in-law is to be filial to in-laws and is one of the main purposes of marriage. Mencius said that "taking a wife as a support" means serving her husband's parents. Ideal standards of obedience, filial piety and affairs such as The Book of Rites? Neizhi demanded that "women should be like parents". When the rooster crowed for the first time, the daughter-in-law got up and went to her in-laws' house to pay her respects, gargle with water and serve dinner. She didn't dare to retire from the private room to have a rest without her in-laws' orders. Daughter-in-law must obey the orders of her in-laws, and the "husband" in the "three obedience" needs to obey the orders of her parents; Each of the "four virtues" is related to cultivating filial parents-in-law. Daughter-in-law who does not obey her in-laws has played a role in disrupting the family's pecking order and destroying harmony. It is a violation of filial piety and women's morality, and it is also the most serious mistake of wives and women. Therefore, in the Han Dynasty, which respected filial piety, we put "unfilial parents" in the first place when we created the "seven fruits" rule. Many examples of divorcing their wives because of unfilial behavior seem unreasonable. For example, Jiang's wife scolded a dog in front of her mother-in-law, which was considered unfilial by her husband. Jiang is also considered a dutiful son. Whether to obey your in-laws is subjective. Some in-laws forced their sons to divorce their wives on the pretext of unfilial, which led to a tragedy similar to the double suicide of Liu Lanzhi and Jiao Zhongqing in Peacock Flying Southeast.
No children
Among the "seven rules", this one is the most innocent for divorced women. The purpose of patriarchal family marriage is to "serve the temple and carry on the family line"; Mencius said, "There are three kinds of unfilial, and the last is the greatest." Marrying a wife is to have children; According to the bloodline principle of patrilineal inheritance, only sons can be considered as descendants of Diptera. Therefore, women should bear the "crime" of not having children. According to the system, you can only marry one wife, so you should abandon the childless wife and marry a new wife to have children. Cao Zhi's "Abandoned Wife Poetry" wrote: "Danggui Ning (divorced) has no children ... If you have children, you will have a menstrual period, and if you don't have children, you will become a meteor; At the end of the day and the month, the meteor is not without essence. " It means that a woman without children is as short-lived as a meteor in her husband's family; Only a wife who has a son can stand like the sun in her husband's family. It can be seen that divorce due to childlessness was widespread in Han Dynasty. Later generations pay more and more attention to the position of "childless" in the "seven endings". For example, in the Tang Dynasty, "no children and no daughters" was put in the first place, and it continued until the Ming and Qing Dynasties. However, it became popular that childless wives should take concubinage, and concubines and children can be regarded as their own lives and are not allowed to be given. Childless and jealous, then there is only divorce. Women who were abandoned because they had no children all went to be maids (for example, Zhuang Jiang, the wife of Wei in the Spring and Autumn Period, was of noble birth and outstanding appearance. The Book of Songs Feng Wei tells people was written to praise her, but she was alienated and neglected because she had no children. The Book of Songs? Hurricane? As the old saying goes, "the sun and the moon" descend to the people (as described in Cao Zhi's Poem on Abandoning a Wife).
"adultery"
Here refers to women's lust and fornication, and "eccentricity" refers to circuitous, which is considered to be the greatest evil virtue in women's moral conduct. (Confucianism also pursues double moral standards for men and women in sexual behavior and morality. This article requires a wife to be chaste to her husband and not to have an affair with men inside and outside the family, so as to maintain family stability and pure blood. The core monument of life ""for its chaos "). For married women, it is considered to be the biggest fault that they can control, and the "head of all evils". After the Song Dynasty, it was a custom to pay attention to "chastity" (unmarried women who keep chastity are commonly known as "yellow flower girls"), and to test the red color on their wedding night (white silk is used to test whether there is blood in the couple's sexual life on the wedding night, and if there is blood, it is a chaste virgin. If there is no blood, it is concluded that adultery is committed and immediately abandoned). Tang law mentioned "fornication" to the second article; Article 3 of the Great Qing Law is listed, but it also stipulates that "seven out" is a crime, and the contingency provisions of "three noes" are not implemented except adultery (see Document No.23 for details). The family plays an important role in punishing adulterous women. For example, in the Qing Dynasty, the family rules of the Confucius branch in Linchuan, Jiangxi Province stipulated that "women who have an affair with others shall be ordered to remarry; If the husband does not marry, the skin cake will be expelled, and the children will not be named. All races, such as marriage and celebration, are not allowed; No name. " In addition to giving up, women who commit adultery will be severely punished by "sinking the pond" (drowning women on bamboo boards at the bottom of the pond, which is the custom in Hunan and other places). The court punished promiscuous women with claustrophobia. In the punishment of Lu, the castration of "suspecting and forgiving castration" is second only to the death penalty. As for novels and plays, such as Water Margin, they have a far-reaching influence on adulterous wives, wives and sisters-in-law.
A nasty disease
"Illness" and "Big Dai Li"? The core monument of life thinks that "we can't share prosperity (prepare sacrifices), and He Xiu in the Eastern Han Dynasty thinks that" we should abandon evil diseases and not serve temples. " He Xiu's classification of numbness, deafness, blindness, furuncle, baldness, lameness and rickets as malignant diseases is too broad. Except for boils, which are highly contagious and difficult to cure, the other six kinds of disabilities do not hinder sacrifice. Xu Shen in the Eastern Han Dynasty, "Shuo Wen Jie Zi": "Furuncle is also a bad disease." "Furuncle" leads to "furuncle", which is leprosy. It is highly contagious, and the patient's whole body rots and burns, his hair withers, and his knuckles heal themselves, which is an incurable disease. Women with this evil disease are not allowed to participate in sacrifices, which will also affect their lives and fertility. They can't bear the ethical responsibility and are naturally abandoned by patriarchal families. Later, people with mental illness were also regarded as malignant diseases. For example, the wife of the son of a distinguished guest in Anping County, Zhili in the Qing Dynasty, Yue, was abandoned by her husband as a "bad disease" because of epilepsy. Yue returned to her family for illness and gradually recovered, while Gui Kezi had remarried and married; Seeing that there was no hope of remarriage, the Yue family refused to remarry and committed suicide by throwing themselves into the well. (For details, see Yong's Collection of the Valley after Forgiveness (Volume 7) and Ke Muyue's epitaph).
be jealous of
"Jealousy" ("jealousy") is to punish those wives who are dissatisfied with their husbands' concubinage and dare to show it in words and actions. It is considered that jealousy has the virtue of obedience and virtue, which is contrary to "women's virtue" Its purpose is to safeguard the interests and needs of patriarchal families with many husbands and many children. In Shuo Wen Jie Zi, the word "jealousy" is interpreted as "women are jealous of their husbands" and the word "Luan" is "husbands are jealous of women", indicating that women had an affair or adultery at that time, which led to more husbands being jealous. Later, people became more accustomed to the wife's jealousy of her husband's concubinage. In the pre-Qin period, upper-class women were not necessarily betrayed even if they were jealous. Zuo Zhuan records that Uncle Jin's mother, Uncle Yang (the first wife), was jealous of Uncle Hu's beautiful mother (concubine) and kept her husband away, fearing that her son would threaten Uncle Xiang's position. Not only did she not get divorced, Zuo Zhuan praised her for her cleverness. In the Eastern Han Dynasty, Yan Feng's wife, Shi Ren, was driven away by her husband for preventing him from concubinage. Yan Feng wrote to his brother-in-law, saying that he was jealous of taking concubinage according to the saint's ceremony, which was unfortunate for himself and his family. If he doesn't find this wife, his family will be restless, and his happiness will not be born. From Wei, Jin, Southern and Northern Dynasties to Tang Dynasty, the jealousy of upper-class women was still very common. Until the Ming and Qing Dynasties when Neo-Confucianism dominated, women's jealousy decreased and even took the initiative to take concubinage.
Said a lot.
The requirements of "Four Virtues" for "female words" should be quiet and taciturn, and "words are not expensive but expensive". Families that prefer sons to daughters are afraid that foreign wives and daughters will alienate interpersonal relationships within the family, especially the relationship between brothers, leading to family disharmony or even disintegration. For example, in the early Han Dynasty, Chen Ping lived with his brother and sister-in-law. His brother plows the land every day and encourages Chen Ping to study abroad. Sister-in-law suspected that Chen Ping couldn't make a living, and said, "It's better to have an uncle than nothing!" Abandoned by her husband, she hurried back to her family. In the Eastern Han Dynasty, Li Chong's wife was outspoken because of her many words. Gossiping between sisters-in-law and creating family discord is also a sign of talkativeness. It is generally believed that women's talkativeness is against women's morality, immoral and crazy, which is intolerable to husbands. In Tang Biao's "Required Reading for Women" in the Qing Dynasty, it was said: "Women have no virtue, all in their voices: those who speak low are virtuous, and those who speak high are immoral." Qing Pingshan Tang Huaben? The Collection of Quick-talking Li Cuilian is about a smart, sensitive, frank, informal and eloquent Li Cuilian, who was rejected by her husband's family, abandoned by her brother and sister-in-law, and finally became a monk.
steal
Taking "stealing" wives and daughters (not stealing other people's property outside, but at home) as one of the "seven outings" reflects that women do not have independent property rights, and also reflects that male-dominated families (families) control women in order to safeguard the property interests of male-dominated families. Book of rites? The internal regulations stipulate: "Children are selfless in wealth, livestock and equipment." Even parents' gifts should be given to their mother-in-law. The property of the mother-in-law's family should not be "privately borrowed" or "privately given", otherwise it would constitute "theft" and be considered as "eating inside and picking outside". Therefore, it is against common sense to define the crime of stealing a wife as an antonym. In the patriarchal marriage and family system, the male family is inside and the female family is outside. Did everything wrong? In Shuo Lin, it is said that a woman who defends her country listens to her mother's teaching before marriage-marriage is unreliable and it is common for her husband to abandon her. She wants to accumulate her own property, and when she gets to her husband's house, she will do as her mother says. Found that "her aunt came out with a lot of her personal things." The Family Law of the extended family stipulates that wives and wives may not keep the public property of the extended family for the extended family. According to the family rules of the Zheng family, family work such as textiles must be carried out collectively, and it is not allowed to be scattered in their small families. Check whether there is a shortage before going to work every day to prevent theft and possession from belonging to small families.
Overview of "Seven Achievements"
"Seven places" are the punishment rules for women. In the early Ming Dynasty, Liu Ji said that the "seven fruits" were not the words of a sage, but the words of a poor husband in later generations. He thinks it is reasonable to get married in five aspects: adultery, jealousy, unfilial, talkative and stealing, while "serious illness" and "childless" are great misfortunes that people don't want to have, but it is against heaven and human nature to get married unexpectedly. (Yu Ion) From today's point of view, the original intention of "seven endings" is (1) to consolidate the patriarchal-in-law (ethnic group) order, such as "unfilial" marriage to safeguard parents' dignity, shifting the responsibility of providing for the aged to women, and "debauchery", "jealousy" and "talkative" marriage to maintain the pecking order. (2) In order to safeguard the interests of the paternal family (race), including the continuation of bloodline and its symbolic significance, social reputation and material interests, it is unreasonable to marry a wife with unreasonable rules such as "childless", "evil disease" and "stealing". Blaming, suppressing and punishing women and making them succumb to sacrifice are the main aspects of the oppression of women by the "seven outcomes" rule. On the other hand, the "seven out" is supplemented by the "three don't go" rule: "take things (marry) and go without returning, don't go; Don't go if you have a mourning period of more than three years; Don't go before you are poor and after you are rich. " ("wearing Li Ji"? This is a revision of Seven Outings, which gives "exemption" to wives who have no family and have been filial to their husbands for three years, but it does not apply to women who commit adultery.
Ancient Divorce: "Seven Outcomes" from Rites to Laws
The patriarchal marriage and family system was established in the Zhou Dynasty. During the Western Zhou Dynasty and even the Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period, the patriarchal clan system was not particularly stable. For example, in the Book of Changes, a wife runs away from home. When Qin Shihuang visited, he found that a man's wife, whose husband was dead, abandoned her children and remarried, so he carved stones to keep the family stable in the world. Before the Qin dynasty, there were no specific rules of "seven out". Although women violate the seven rules, they may not get divorced, but their husbands can abandon their wives without restriction. When the Confucianists in Han Dynasty expounded the ancient rites, they stipulated the rules of "Seven Outings", "Five Don't Marry" and "Three Don't Go" according to the needs at that time, and these rules were only implemented within the scope of family (national) ethics. In the Tang Dynasty, "Seven Outcomes" and "Three Don't Go" entered the legal category. Tang Ling said: "Anyone who abandons a wife must have the shape of" Seven Outcomes ":no children. All men abandon it in calligraphy ... although they made seven mistakes, there are three things they can't do. If you don't go, it means that once you handle menstruation's funeral, it will be cheaper if you marry, and more expensive if you marry. " In addition, the Tang law also added a "one-off" clause in the dissolution of marriage (see No.24 file). The law also stipulates that a wife who leaves her without hesitation without going through worldly desires will be punished. Since the Song, Yuan, Ming and Qing Dynasties, the divorce law has basically followed the Tang law.
"One Unique Skill" and "Li He"
"Yi Jue" and "Li He" are both legal ways to dissolve marriage. The word "one must" first appeared in the biography of White Tiger in Han Dynasty. Get married. " The ceremony stipulates that the husband can divorce his wife, and the wife can't leave her husband, but the husband "violates human relations, kills his wife and parents, abandons discipline, and is chaotic; "If you are just, you must go." A wife can leave her husband who killed her in-laws, because he broke the principle of "the righteousness of husband and wife", and it is natural for her to leave him. As a legal provision of forced divorce, "one-off" began in the Tang Dynasty, and is no longer limited to the parents who killed their wives and husbands, but includes the aggression (beating, cursing and hurting) of husbands or wives against the parents, grandparents, brothers and grandparents of the other party. Among the seven conditions of "loyalty" prevailing in Tang and Song Dynasties, two are for husbands, 65,438+0 is shared by husband and wife, and four are for wives, among which "a wife wants to harm her husband" means "loyalty". The law also stipulates that those who commit a crime and never divorce shall be sentenced to "one year in prison". Yuan, Ming and Qing dynasties changed the content of meaning according to different times.
"Harmony without difference" first appeared in the Tang Dynasty "Tang Law? Family marriage, after the article "The righteous leave them", stipulates: "Husband and wife are not at peace and do not sit with those who leave (asking for sin). "Husband divorce need to sign a" wife release book ". Later generations followed the example of the Tang Dynasty, and also called "harmonious divorce" "consensual divorce", which was followed by modern laws.