Aristotle said: A child is not a complete person at birth. They are hateful little animals. After more than 20 years of humanization, we have transformed our children into adults.
Think about it, a two-or three-year-old child, because the room is very hot, will strip off his clothes and run around without any shame. He wants to go to the toilet, and he doesn't look back to see if anyone is around.
Don't talk about adults, a little older children will know shame, but before school, children, like small animals, are manipulated by physical instinct and can't control their emotions and behaviors. Many years later, parents and schools taught tens of thousands of human behaviors one by one, making them truly adults.
This is an old saying in China: A child gets an education and grows up at last.
Adults are not formed naturally only through the passage of time, especially before the age of six, and they need to lay a good foundation through family education.
To make children adults, we must first cultivate their self-esteem. According to Maslow's hierarchy of needs theory, it also shows that this is the most basic demand of human beings and the driving force for survival. With self-esteem, there is motivation for other behaviors.
Maslow divided self-esteem into two categories: internal self-esteem and external self-esteem. Before the age of 6, children's self-esteem is mainly formed after winning self-esteem through external feedback.
Therefore, in the process of raising children, parents should pay attention to let children get positive self-feedback through communication, don't ridicule or satirize, admit their mistakes and listen to their demands patiently.
Children don't know how to compete when they are born, and parents can't give their children "motivation" by comparing with others, which will make them feel inferior.
After education and training, children receive higher education, acquire skills or knowledge in professional fields through their majors, and can make contributions to society and the country with their own strength. At this time, it can be said that the child has a foundation for success.
Growing up to this point requires a good family education as a guarantee.
To make children successful, we must first cultivate self-confidence. Emerson, an American writer, once said, "Self-confidence is the key to success."
Self-trust is the first secret of success.
Listening and respect are the foundation of children's self-confidence. Parents should pay more attention to their children's emotions, especially children before the age of six. Their expressive ability is not strong enough, and many things cannot be said. It depends on parents' discerning eyes to find out.
We can constantly create opportunities in the process of practice to make children realize that their existence is valuable, such as helping parents take out the garbage, fill meals, sweep the floor and so on.
Parents should listen to their children's needs carefully and patiently, and can't ignore their behaviors and words.
Parents should not do everything for their children, because self-confidence is obtained from the success of actions. Children who are clearly arranged by their parents will not realize what real self-confidence is, because everything is not obtained through real efforts, but given by their parents.
There are three levels of success in a person's life, one is study, the other is personal life, and the third is career.
If you want children to succeed, you must first cultivate their sense of responsibility. For children, the sense of responsibility is to be brave in making mistakes, to have more judgment in the face of right and wrong, and to enhance the sense of responsibility to others and society.
Responsibility can be made clear to children not by preaching, but by parents' words and deeds.
Self-esteem and shame make people unwilling to face their mistakes, but parents should let their children learn to accept their imperfections bravely and show the courage to correct rather than escape when facing mistakes.
First of all, parents should realize that they are also responsible for their children's mistakes, and they can't point all the responsibilities at their children, such as "I taught you, why are you still like this?" This kind of reprimand just puts all the responsibility on the children and makes them feel afraid of making mistakes. Over time, they will subconsciously be unwilling to face the responsibility.
From the perspective of parents, we must first have a clear understanding of mistakes. Making mistakes is not a bad thing, but an opportunity for children to correct their mistakes. Only in this way can children feel love in the process of correcting their mistakes, think they are responsible for their mistakes, and grow up.
Self-esteem, self-confidence and sense of responsibility are the foundation of children's life. Without these three points, success is just a mirage.
Only with these psychological qualities can you be said to be a qualified successful person.
It is crucial that children should be enterprising if they want to have these three basic prerequisites. Enterprises are like the fuel of action. With it, they can keep pursuing and never stop.
Enterprise is the driving force of children's self-struggle. Enterprising children can strive to realize their dreams and live a successful and happy life without relying on others. When a child is enterprising, his life potential can be greatly developed. Without enterprises, it may not be hard to live, but it may be a mediocre life, because they are content with the status quo and have no sense of progress.
Every parent wants their children to live a different life from others, to be truly live high instead of drifting with the tide, and to cultivate their enterprising spirit in their childhood.
There are two steps to cultivate children's initiative:
1. Encourage and praise
As long as children do something wrong in childhood, no matter whether it is perfect or not, they should be encouraged and praised in time.
Parental encouragement is the source of children's early self-confidence. Even a small matter, if recognized by parents, is also a kind of "success" for children.
When the heart has the joy of success, it will form psychological inertia, thus prompting children to be more willing to pursue success by their own efforts next time.
2. Develop independent behavior habits
Parents should know that children's age is not a shield, and no matter how young they are, they can't form the habit of dependence. In childhood, because children are not strong enough physically and physically, many things need the help of their parents. Parents are advised to let their children try to do it themselves as long as there is an opportunity.
Cut off the back road of children's support, and they will look forward better, instead of always thinking that someone will do it for me, so they are lazy.
Only by doing these two things well can we have a good start in cultivating children's initiative and let us study independently and become adults in the future.
It is not enough for children to be enterprising, but also to be compassionate. The British philosopher Russell once said: There are three important things in life, one is the pursuit of truth, the other is the pursuit of true love, and the third is sympathy for suffering.
We also have many related words in Chinese, such as love, kindness, filial piety, sympathy and pity. To sum up, it is a quality, that is, kindness and compassion.
With compassion, children can have a sense of being kind to life when they are adults, and they can be better to themselves and others.
A person's kindness can benefit him for life. He is confident, self-respecting and responsible. The child is a real person. With enterprise, the child is a successful person, but the result may be a hero, but it may also be a lean man.
Only when parents are compassionate can a child become an upright and compassionate successful person.
Only in this way can people make positive contributions to society and the country.
Although there is only one word difference between adults and talents, there is a huge gap between parents' efforts in raising children. It is the result of these qualities that children are promising, rich and successful.
Pay attention to the cultivation of children's personality virtues and give them education of truth, goodness and beauty. Children are the first people to contact their parents and families, and what kind of parents will guide their children in what direction.
There is a cloud in Zuo Zhuan: "There is virtue in the world, followed by meritorious deeds, followed by words. Although it will not be abolished for a long time, this is called immortality. "
Throughout the ages, all the sages regarded "Xiu De" as a compulsory course in life.
Parents should consciously give themselves a wake-up call at all times, not only to let their children have rich material conditions and educational resources, but more importantly, to cultivate their personality and virtue.
Although children can learn many rules by themselves in society in the future, most of them take countless detours to know the truth. With a sound psychological foundation, what's the use of becoming a talent?
If parents can spend more time with their children, take more actions, set more examples and improve their children's quality of life, then it is most important to have a sound personality.