At present, there are four most recognized types of family education: authoritative, authoritative, laissez-faire and neglected.
Use the simplest chart to distinguish:
Autocratic type: parents have a high degree of control over their children and a low degree of acceptance. Parents will impose many rules, and they will ask their children to strictly abide by them by humiliating and punishing them. Lack of smooth communication between parents and children. In children's minds, such an image of parents is often respectable and awesome.
Authority: Parents have requirements and control over their children. They will make clear rules and constantly strengthen them. They will explain the meaning behind the rules to their children, and at the same time actively listen to their ideas and make positive responses. In children's minds, such parents are often respectable and lovely.
Indulgence: Parents will encourage their children to express their feelings and respond positively. But they rarely set rules for their children, and even if there are rules, they are often difficult to maintain because they are considerate of their children. Children often love their parents very much, but they often lack due respect for their parents.
Neglect: Parents seldom participate in their children's growth. They don't seem to care much about their children. Or parents have been confused by their own problems and have no energy to care about the discipline and guidance of their children. In children's minds, parents and themselves seem to be separated by a wall forever, and it is difficult to feel the warmth and cohesion of the family.
What's the difference between children growing up in these different family education environments?
Children usually feel good about themselves when they get a lot of love and support. They often show a good sense of boundaries, respect others and respect themselves. They are often good at communication and coordination. These are the most important basic parts of soft power.
When children are often asked by their parents to accept high-altitude combat, their hard power in some aspects or skills tends to rise, but in the process of being forced to complete the challenge, they often experience too much self-doubt. Faced with the strong will of parents, some children even have to kill themselves and eventually become a person who lacks a complete self. They often lack a sense of boundary and have weak coordination ability.
When children accept high challenges and get a lot of love and support, they will have both hard power and soft power. When the two are harmoniously combined, personal charm and team cohesion are revealed.
If we use triangles to represent hard power and circles to represent soft power, we can get the following simple schematic diagram:
Authoritarian type: children will have strong skills in some aspects, and often have a high professional level after work, but due to the lack of sufficient soft power, it is easy to hurt others and eventually hurt themselves.
Indulgence: children are easy to get along with others, but their professional level is often lacking. Once the external environment deteriorates, the ego is easily punctured due to the lack of sufficient hard power.
Neglect type: children's soft power and hard power are relatively weak. Their lives are often difficult, and their hearts are often painful.
Authority: Children's soft power and hard power are relatively high. They can often protect themselves better and go further.
From a realistic point of view, it is unrealistic to simply divide family education into four categories. Family education is much more complicated than this. But from another point of view, a simple and effective model often helps us to deepen our understanding of reality and help us find a solution to family education problems.
This paper aims to help everyone realize the most recognized family education model at present. But please don't be in a hurry to sit down. In the next article, I will analyze more complicated situations in real life.