Your child will become like this for the following reasons:
First, parents' care and love are far from enough. Please think about it. When he was young, he came back from kindergarten. Did you listen to him tell you what he learns every day in kindergarten? Have you ever heard of any child who quarreled with him today? How did he deal with it? When he first entered school, did you pay attention to his life and study every day? Did the teacher praise him today? Do you often listen to this? These may only be done in half an hour when you see the children. If not, then the child will lose your love and attention, and he will start to seek new attention. Even if you do something bad on purpose, he will still do it when you lose your temper. He'll think you're watching him.
Second, your child may have entered a rebellious period. Children have three or four rebellious periods in their lives, and there are differences between individuals. Maybe this specific time is not very accurate. But in theory, the first time was two years old, the second time was five years old, and the third time was at this time. This is also a normal physiological reaction. But a well-educated child, his rebellious period is not obvious, or even never appeared at all.
Third, you give your children too little praise and encouragement, too much criticism and accusation, the most failed and wrong beating and cursing! Have you ever respected children? Have you ever squatted down when talking to him, as tall as him? You are kidding! Are you sure what you are interested in? Have you ever been guided by nature? Is it direct and severe criticism?
4. Is the rare rest day busy with housework or busy with the elderly? Do you often go out to play with children? You don't have to go to the park, you have to go as far as possible, even if it's just shopping. Do you regard shopping as a parent-child activity? Did you ask him for advice on buying? Did you involve him in family decisions? Have you ever played football with children? Have you ever shot at each other with a water gun and finally went to take a shower and change clothes together?
If what I said above fits your situation, then I'll give you some advice. The child is still young, and everything can be saved. Don't collapse yet.
1. Your child's problem is too serious for normal education to change. Please give the child at least one year. Don't worry, as long as the children adjust themselves, they will soon catch up with the primary school curriculum. Don't believe the teacher's alarmist words. He can't catch up without laying a good foundation. There is some truth in those words, but if you push him now, it will only backfire. The first thing you should do is to give your children more time to get along. I think, no matter how stressful your life is and how busy your work is, you should try to give this time to your children. If you don't want his life to continue to deteriorate like this, this is a must!
This time of day doesn't have to be long, but the quality must be high. On the rest day, you might as well put down some housework first and let the dust accumulate there for a few more days. Never as important as children.
Second, in the parent-child time every day, all you have to do is ask him about his day at school. Did you eat well? Is the school heating still hot? What's interesting between classmates? Remember, don't ask him less about his studies. You know it's not ideal not to ask. Don't worry, don't ask, just ask him what he would be interested in. Ask him what he wants for dinner. During the break, make some fancy dishes specially for him, so that he can feel your concern and love for him! Then during the break, you might as well play games with him and let him tell you how to play. You can learn with an open mind and compete with him. You are definitely not as good as him. The purpose of doing this is only to establish his self-confidence and improve the relationship between the two generations. But make it clear before you play. I will play with you today, but only for an hour.
Stick to this for a month, and your relationship with your children will improve. Maybe he won't cooperate at first, be patient and care more about the children. Only when the relationship improves will he begin to listen to you.
Third, praise more, criticize less, and say your love without hesitation. You may think that if you want to praise his current situation, he can't find a topic, but it's okay to praise him for being smart, right? Can play computer games, but very smart. Look for more shining places on children, which is what you will do in the future. A parent must know how to find advantages from children and affirm them in time. Let your child know that you love him. In your heart, he is great, not useless.
4. Spend some time playing football and shopping with children. If possible, take him to a science museum or something. If possible, take him to work with you for half a day and let him witness your hard work. It's much better to say less about your own hardships and difficulties and let the children feel it for themselves than to say that I did it for you. Crazy with children, the family can laugh together and run with sweat! You can even catch chicken legs together while eating. You will find that after the family laughs and goes crazy together, the children will be obedient as never before.
Don't indulge or ignore his shortcomings and faults. Tell him your opinion, your dissatisfaction and disappointment, tell the truth, not too much. He knows right from wrong about what he has done. If he fully knows your love for him, he will be self-disciplined.
Six, in the process of children's growth, there should be enough "freedom" to start "self-discipline". Please recall whether you didn't give your child enough "freedom" when he was young. For example, did you let him eat his hand when it was his turn? When his mouth is sensitive, do you allow him to explore all the toys by tasting? When he is sensitive to action, do you allow him to throw everything on the ground? He won't start the sensitive period of literacy and mathematics until he is five and a half years old. Aren't you too early for him to learn these things? If you don't understand the child's growth process and restrain him from some "freedom" he deserves, he will make up for it crazily when you don't care. Once he has finished, he will start to exercise self-discipline. Therefore, you should first let go of your ideological baggage and exchange your love for your child's trust and respect. After he loves and respects you, he will naturally start to listen to you.
Come to me at any time when you are in specific trouble! I am willing to help you find all the bright spots in your child! ljl02 12@gmail.com
Finally, add a point, buy a toy for children to hit people, such as punching sandbags, drum sets, and a big tumbler that can't be beaten, so that children can vent their emotions. Because, even if you do everything right away, the child may not be able to adapt! It is also helpful to give him such toys to meet his emotional venting needs.