First of all, how to cultivate intimacy with children?
? The earliest time to cultivate intimacy is when children are 0-3 years old. When he opened his eyes, he saw his mother's smiling face, her constant concern and timely feeding. The child thinks that the world is safe, trustworthy and life is beautiful. If children are not accompanied in time when they are young, how can they make up for the lack of intimacy?
1? Common experiences often take children out together: picnics, going back to their hometown to visit the elderly, playing games, etc. Let children get in touch with the land, sunshine and air of nature and improve their spirits; Playing games with parents is because parents are the best toys for children.
2? Intimate companionship: Why do couples divorce so much now? It's because they have less common experience, less words and no intimacy with each other.
3? Love contact often gives children appreciation, massage, eye encouragement, pat on the shoulder and hug, which will make children feel the love and support of their parents.
Secondly, it gives people a sense of security.
? How to win children's hearts in daily life? That is, when children make mistakes, can parents correct them correctly? Parents should accept their children correctly and allow all kinds of events to happen. Only parents can accept, because acceptance is the beginning of change! When children make mistakes, parents should meditate: great, the opportunity for children to grow up is coming! Because everything happens, there is grace!
? Especially when children make mistakes, parents should not throw stones at their children and hold on to them. For example, if a child accidentally breaks a cup, the mother should say, "Are you hurt, son?" ? Come and show mom " Then he went on to say, "Did you get a fright when you accidentally broke the glass just now? Especially worried, afraid, worried that mom will accuse you and dad will hit you? " ? Because only parents can reason first and then reason, can they empathize with their children. "I know you don't want to break it. You're worried, scared and self-blaming, aren't you? Don't be sad, let's think about how to stabilize and teach your mother. "Let children reflect on their behavior and sum up experience in time." Son, you can sweep the broken glass off the floor. How about washing dishes three times this week to make up for your mistakes? "This kind of communication makes children dare to take responsibility.
Third? Give children a sense of belonging.
? The best way to give children a sense of belonging is to let them participate in family decisions, such as where their families will go to play, buy a house to decorate, make friends to shop and so on. One of the most important ways is to hold a family meeting, which has seven steps: to be grateful for having you, to have something that you (I) are most proud of, to give you some advice, to discuss family affairs, to play games together, to eat snacks for pocket money, and to take pictures as a souvenir. As we know, the family has three functions: nurturing, education and entertainment. The development of family meetings provides opportunities for each member to make suggestions, which not only promotes family communication and emotional flow, but also enables family members to find a sense of autonomy and belonging.
Fourth, give children a sense of value.
? Gurion, an expert in boy rearing, said that every child is born with his own talent and mission. Parents will be happy as long as they obey their children's own nature. The best way to give children a sense of value is to let them help others, discover the bright spot (excellent quality) in his life, appreciate and praise him, and give them a spiritual baptism. For example, let him participate in volunteer activities, give one-on-one help and contribute to others.
? Always say these words to your children at home: I need your help, son! (Make him feel helpful to others) My son, I want to thank you, because you have behaved so well, you are a good boy, and you have made me a good mother, so I want to thank you. Gratitude is seeing, and seeing is love.
Fifth, give children a sense of accomplishment.
? If you want your child to do something continuously, you must give your child a sense of accomplishment. For example, if a child's grades improve, you should affirm him: Son, do you know why you have made such rapid progress? I find that you get up at eight o'clock every morning, listen carefully in class, and go home to review consciously at night. I feel that you are a hard-working, diligent and active child, so my mother thinks that your grades will get better and better. This is called the appreciation process, and the result is certain.
? Positive people are like places where the sun shines, while negative people are different from the fifteenth day of the first lunar month. May we all become positive parents and bring positive energy to our children!