"Every child can come to this world, which is inevitable by accident. This is because it is accidental that men and women who love each other meet in the vast sea of people. In the initial stage of life, it follows the evolutionary theory of survival of the fittest. Through fierce competition, the most powerful tadpole finally fuses with the egg, then develops slowly in the mother body and finally comes to this world. It is inevitable. "

When MengMeng's father said these words, if you think about it carefully, you will feel particularly philosophical. In the process of talking with him, Leng Yue, a cold stone, found that he had a characteristic, that is, he spoke slowly, but he had a strong sense of rhythm, and every sentence was thought before explanation.

I asked him, "Have you always been such an expression habit?"

MengMeng's father said, "No, before MengMeng was one year old, I spoke very fast and often spoke carelessly. My wife doesn't like my style of speaking. She says I'm not mature enough. But when MengMeng was one year old and began to learn to speak, it suddenly dawned on me. If I am not a mature father, how can I educate my daughter and give her a happy home? "

I asked again, "What experience can you share with your parents and friends on your way to maturity?"

MengMeng's father said, "I think the most valuable experience is that parents must learn to practice while accompanying their children to grow up. Because we never know how to be a qualified parent and become an excellent parent, we must keep learning and constantly improve our personality in order to get rid of impetuousness, calm ourselves down and think deeply, and have enough energy to care for and educate our children. "

Did MengMeng's father's words inspire you? Let's continue to listen to his theme of "Parents' Practices".

MengMeng's father said: Before MengMeng was one year old, my family was probably like many other families. There are always bumps between husband and wife, and contradictions and differences often come unexpectedly. One day after MengMeng was over one year old, her daughter didn't know why she always cried. The wife was annoyed by her daughter's endless crying and lost control of her emotions. She vented her anger on her daughter loudly. This scene shocked me very much. Suddenly, when I was young, my father scolded me. I think, children are so young that they have to bear the bad emotions of adults for no reason. For the sake of the baby, she will be very scared. Will not get sick.

In order to ease my wife's bad mood, I told her, you go to rest and I'll take care of MengMeng. When I held MengMeng in my arms, patted her on the back and whispered to her, "Baby, don't be afraid if you have a father." At the same time, she came to the living room with her baby in her arms and comforted MengMeng while walking. The baby's crying soon stopped and she fell asleep in my arms. I have always maintained that posture, but my brain has been thinking about a question-is the adult's mood good or bad, why is the baby so sensitive?

I remember reading Spock's parenting classic and reading this sentence: "This innate difference in children's reaction to the outside world is called personality. As children grow up, this personality difference becomes more and more obvious. For example: What is the anti-interference ability? How enthusiastic is the expression of feelings? Are you particularly sensitive to sound, touch, taste, light or temperature? Are you not prepared to adapt to the suddenly changing environment? Can you persist? "

Think carefully, it turns out that MengMeng's constant crying stems from the influence of her mother's bad mood, and her wife was in her physiological period. At this time, she will be particularly agitated and inexplicably angry. But she never thought that she was upset, but she could directly pass it on to her children, and she also blamed the children for worrying her and causing her trouble.

In contrast, when I picked up MengMeng and left the dormitory, the child was quickly moved to a new environment. My voice is different from her mother's, and I have a different attitude towards her, which quickly freed MengMeng from her irritability. When the baby feels very comfortable in his father's arms, he will naturally calm down and feel safe enough to fall asleep.

Later, my wife and I had an in-depth exchange on this matter. When she found that I could help her at a critical time by studying parenting knowledge at ordinary times, she asked me, "Can you take care of MengMeng more? I found that the difference between reading and not reading is really great. "

After listening to my wife's words, I replied, "If you put me in charge of educating MengMeng, you can't interfere too much. You just need to do a good job in logistics and spend more time with your baby when you are in a good mood. When you feel tired and uncomfortable, you'd better not avoid it. " Hearing this, my wife was happy and agreed to my arrangement. It is because of this conversation that I shoulder the heavy responsibility as the first responsible person of family education.

When I really became a dad, I found myself deeply in love with this role, as if I had gained some privilege. In my opinion, the biggest problem that many young mothers often tire themselves out is that they don't know how to let go, and they won't let their fathers participate in caring and accompanying their children, and they won't let their fathers discipline their children.

For the wife, she has let go of her daughter, so she is free and has no burden.

For me, I took responsibility, so I got the right, and I must be responsible for this right.

I cherish every day when I grow up with my daughter, because I clearly know that I have specific work to do in family education every day, and I must learn to do a few things.

Item 1: Carefully plan my work and parenting time.

Part two: Make a reasonable study plan of parenting knowledge and put it into practice.

Article 3: While constantly discovering our own shortcomings, we must try our best to correct them.

Fourth: I want to influence my wife with my own parenting concept. Let's work hard to raise children together.

Number 5: Set a goal and time node for yourself and mature as soon as possible.

My wife saw me list these five things and asked me with a smile, "Are you going to practice?"

I said, "OK, I'll go first. As soon as I get started, you can keep up. "

She smiled and agreed.

It is precisely because I took the responsibility before and started the practice of being a mature father that the relationship between husband and wife changed qualitatively in less than a year.

First of all, the wife is more relaxed because she lacks the specific responsibility of raising children. Under my recommendation, she went to yoga class with a relaxed mind to keep fit, and her physical and mental state began to improve, and her complexion became better and better.

Secondly, the differences between my wife and I in parenting concepts and practices gradually disappeared, because she found that under my careful care, her daughter's performance in all aspects far exceeded her expectations. As I usually tell her, I am good at parenting, and I will do it with my heart. Cooking is what you are good at, so you can cook carefully.

Thirdly, the division of family affairs is clear, and everyone is more and more relaxed, which just lays a good foundation for building a new relationship between husband and wife. Sometimes my wife will talk about the troubles of my sisters' family, compare the orderliness of my family, and even thank my capable husband for praising each other. This has become a common sight in our family.

As a father, what I feel most about MengMeng's family education is that it is better to speak well than to do well. In fact, doing it silently is not practice. Many couples are constantly contradicting each other, either saying more but doing less, or putting the blame on one of them. Take parenting as an example. Most fathers put the responsibility on their wives, and they will confidently say, "Who is not like this?" What woman has no children? "

In my opinion, if fathers can really change this wrong idea, as long as you can take up the responsibility of parenting, you will certainly not do badly in many cases. Because for men, they are better at thinking and learning, and better at constantly challenging themselves. In this regard, I personally just had a good experience. If any father didn't pay attention to family education in the past, he might as well pick it up and take a spiritual journey.

Conclusion: I like talking with MengMeng's father very much, and I can always learn something from him every time. Just like the theme of today's practice, if we think about it carefully, if we have this idea and really work hard to practice it, each of us will have great changes in the years when we accompany our children to grow up. Growing up with children and witnessing each other's changes are the improvement of our quality of life brought by children. Of course, for parents who always use many excuses to shirk their childcare responsibilities, you may be free for the time being today, but if there is something wrong with their children's education, trouble will naturally come to you. If you want to worry about the future and don't want to bore your children, practice now.