In the western educational concept, children are independent individuals with independent needs, and children only need to choose their own development path according to their own interests and personal abilities. Many policies formulated by the government, parents' starting point is based on whether their children are respected.
What kind of children are good children? In this respect, Chinese and western educational concepts are different.
The best education for children is the company of parents.
In the present family education, many parents leave their children in their hometown for relatives to help them with their work, to provide them with a better material life, or to leave their children in the care of nannies. Parents who originally wanted to improve their quality of life let these children miss the best education-the companionship of their parents in the golden age of growth.
In this regard, Liu Xiuying pointed out that the study found that there is a time limit for establishing intimate relationship with children, and parents must establish intimate relationship with their children before 12 years old. If such feelings are not established, children will easily have various problems with their parents when they reach puberty.
In America, it is considered inhuman for parents not to be around their children. For example,/kloc-children under 0/2 can't stay at home alone. Once reported, not only children will be taken away by social welfare agencies, but parents will also be accused of "endangering children's safety".
Domestic parents will say that for the sake of children, they are forced to separate from their children and go out to work to earn money, so that children can have a better material life. But parents don't think it's their idea. Children may prefer to be poor and live with their parents. Therefore, parents who are running for their lives, please put aside their own affairs for the time being, feel their children's hearts with heart, and pay attention to and attach importance to their real needs.
When Yang Zhanyi came home from school, his grandmother had already gone out, and he was waiting for her to come back at home (shot on 2065 438+04. 5. 26). Yang Zhanyi lives in a villager group in Dongsheng Village, Madiren Township, Longsheng Autonomous County, Guangxi. 10 years old, a student of Dongsheng Primary School. His mother left him when he was eight months old. Dad worked in Guangdong and didn't come back until the Spring Festival. (Photo by Xinhua News Agency reporter Lu Boan)
Children's freedom has a premise.
Because of the special one-child policy, most families in China have started the "4,265,438+0" model, so parents in China tend to spoil their children too much. Although most adults know the dangers of doting on their children, and what they say may be right, if they really put it into practice, many parents will unconsciously "submit, obey and accommodate" their children.
Liu Xiuying thinks that doting is the most typical case of family education in China. She said that doting is often out of her own emotional needs. If parents are rational and respect the law of children's growth, then they should know to hide half of their love. For example, when a mother sees a child fall, she must realize that this is something that the child must experience during his growth. If we only expand the severity of the fall from the perspective of taking care of the children, it will have a negative hint to the children, that is, it is very serious and unbearable.
Liu Xiuying pointed out in particular that compared with the doting arranged by older parents, the doting of young parents in China is more obvious. She further explained that many young parents in China misunderstood the western concept of children's education and simply thought that western education was "free" and "gave children space". But the fact is that children's freedom has a premise and cannot be endless. Children should have the courage and ability to be responsible for their actions. However, young parents often ignore this point and fail to impart a sense of responsibility to their children.
For a child, you should know that you can't talk loudly in the cinema, you can't run around in the restaurant, you can't make a scene in the middle of the night, which will affect others' rest, and so on. Parents have the responsibility to help their children establish a sense of rules, which parents in China should pay attention to when studying western family education.