Keywords: students are suitable for school education and family education
In the first section of the compulsory Chinese course "Cheers to Youth" published by Jiangsu Education Press, the second section of Mr. Yangzi's "Eighteen and Others" describes the contradiction between the two generations, and advocates that parents and children should understand and communicate with each other to enhance their feelings. When Mr. Ma Bo teaches this part, let the students talk about their daily contradictions with their parents. At first, the students were silent for a while. Finally, someone stood up and said that his mother forced him to study at night. He retorted that if he studied at night, he would not go to school. I also told my mother that you didn't discuss it with me when you gave birth to me. Why should I listen to you now? The result of the argument was mother's compromise.
It is really puzzling that the student should say such a thing. His thoughts are confused and his logic is unclear. He doesn't know what to say or what to do. Obviously, this kind of students' humanistic quality and life cognition ability are seriously insufficient. I guess the education he received from childhood was incomplete, flawed and even abnormal. This is a preliminary judgment from his almost absurd words, his smirking expression and his standing posture when answering questions.
Later, I learned from his class teacher that his parents are businessmen, who work hard all day and earn a lot of money, but their children don't ask much about their studies. Mother has a bad temper and a bad temper. She is always beating and cursing, letting the children do what they want. When children grow up, their wings become hard, and some of them are out of control. Parents are a little aware of their negligence in educating their children. So I tried to make up for it, and found an acquaintance to send my child to a key high school so that he could receive a good education. However, this is just the wishful thinking of parents. Children and schools are mutually exclusive and have no interest in learning. They are always fighting, swearing, surfing the Internet, falling in love, playing truant, being punished by teachers and schools.
This confirmed my initial judgment and did not make me think further. It should be said that this is not a special case. There are also students in our class who make mistakes again and again, and their bad records accumulate until they are dismissed. "I invited his parents, but they hid the needle in cotton. It seems to be a kind warning to me: I just pay you to look after the child, and he will be fine if he doesn't study, as long as he doesn't get fired. Low education is your business. Why did you come to me instead? " I was so angry that I was about to vomit blood that I sighed. Like father, like son. I didn't expect my son to be even worse. He even said that he would beat Lao Tzu. Some people say that the post-90s generation is a beast in sheep's clothing and a kitten in tiger's clothing. This is a simple and vivid portrayal of the behavior and conversation of the post-90 s group, as well as the fragile and empty mind under the cover of a strong coat. What they need is not only the satisfaction of money and material desires, but also the control of their parents and the nourishment and comfort of their families, but they can't get it. The appearance of this situation is a discordant note in the grand movement of social leap-forward development.
I would rather attribute it to the negligence of family education direction, which bears direct and unshirkable responsibility. In my opinion, this kind of student should receive a more suitable education, go to a technical school to learn a skill, and always support himself in the future. You really shouldn't sharpen your head and get into this key high school to receive inappropriate education and cook all day. As a result, he is very weak now, and it will only be worse to supplement ginseng bird's nest. If the drug is not symptomatic, it will only aggravate the condition until it is incurable. No matter how capable his parents are, what should they do to send him to college? Nothing is learned, nothing is done. So what if I help him arrange his work? Because I am a vegetarian and chat everywhere, I am a cripple in society, which is very sad. Unfortunately, life is difficult for a hundred years, and parents can't accompany him for a lifetime!
We said that we should give our children a good education, but this mother didn't understand the true meaning of "good education". A good education must first be suitable. Children are born with different talents. After the compulsory education stage, the quality and ability of talent-based training have changed. Next, we should choose a suitable school for him according to his current quality and ability. Choosing a school is a question of educational philosophy. Mr. Liu Yonghe of Nanjing Institute of Education once used the analogy that the faucet will leak if it is screwed too tightly or not, saying that the education and family management of the school should be appropriate. I think his reasoning is appropriate, accurate and convincing. However, our parents can't see this. They feel that they can't find a job when they go to college, and there is no way out without going to college.
I don't want to say that this view is wrong, because it is a "mistake" made by self-righteous love, but it must be seen that it is extremely unfavorable to the growth of children. Not many American students are admitted to universities. Most students choose a college to learn technology according to their own interests and abilities, and the blue collar comes out. They are also very happy. Our parents make unrealistic efforts to provide their children with what they think is a "good education". They have to go to college and become white-collar workers and gold collars in the future, otherwise they will be inferior. As a result, it backfired and became "no collar". Only then did I realize that blue collar is better than nothing, but what's the use? After all, life can't be repeated.
What should a good family education look like? This question is too big for me to say comprehensively. So let me give you a few simple examples for parents' reference. Did you tell your children that I will give you 200 yuan before the mid-term exam? Or, give you five dollars to buy a bag of salt, and the remaining three dollars will be yours. So let's see what American parents do. Bill, go and help me wash the car. I have to prepare dinner now. When bill cleans the car, dad will say, hey, bill, good job! Then give him a dollar and say, this is your due reward. One gives money to let children do things, and the other gives money to let children do things. What is the difference? Of course not, very different! The former is to lure children to study and do things with money. Learning and simple housework are what children should do, but it is too outrageous to lure them with money. This is essentially the corrosion and sweet destruction of children's hearts. On the other hand, the latter teaches children that labor is paid and they should work. However, a very simple case reflects two diametrically opposite educational ideas, more precisely, two ways of thinking. Which is better or worse? Where are you going? Parents are requested to think twice.
Thinking is the forerunner of action, but thinking must be supplemented by action and constantly updated and improved in practice in order to keep pace with the times. Without practice, no matter how advanced the educational concept is, it will be feeble. In the end, it will become a rigid dogma because of the lack of fresh blood injection, which will bind people and bind people. Our parents like to order their children to do this and that. If you don't do well, you will be reprimanded, and you will often be rebellious and rebellious. Then I complain that my child is disobedient, and I beat and scold him if he is fierce, but I never think about what I am doing when I ask my child to do something. It's hard to imagine how convincing it would be for parents to go home and lie on the sofa, kicking shoes, crossing their legs, pressing the remote control and watching TV with relish, but asking their children to go home and do their homework. It is also hard to imagine how effective it is for parents to go to bed early and get up late, procrastinating and having no concept of time, but asking their children to go to school at night and get up early on time; What is even more unimaginable is that parents are rude and often beat and scold their children, but they want their children to understand the hard work of making money, and they will be echoed in a bad mood. ...
The reason is simple but always ignored. It is better to teach by example than by example. Parents' words and deeds, every move, children will see in their eyes, remember in their hearts, and behave. This influence is subtle, but it is long-lasting. Even if this influence is not enough, parents can ask their children to do it, and the children will be convinced. Only in this respect, shouldn't parents improve their behavior habits? Don't you consider improving your overall quality in the long run? Parents not only educate their children, but also get education from educating their children. I suggest that it is an emergency, palliative and appropriate method for students to attend technical schools. As the parents of the first teacher, the fundamental solution is to improve their comprehensive quality and choose the appropriate family and school education for their children.