? Because we are not only teachers, but also parents.
? Adler: Austrian psychiatrist and founder of individual psychology. He believes that people's physical defects bring people's sense of inferiority. If people's sense of inferiority is not satisfactorily compensated, then people will have mental illness and psychological and emotional dysfunction and disorder. Children will inevitably have various problems in the process of growing up, such as shyness, withdrawn, stuttering, bed wetting, fighting, lying, and even aversion to learning. All kinds of problems in children's behavior are just appearances, and parents' violence can only make the problems worse.
? 1. Psychological compensation: All children will have an innate sense of inferiority, which will stimulate children's imagination and try to eliminate it by improving the environment.
? 2. A good way to know a child's social and emotional development is to carefully observe his performance when he enters school. Entering the campus for the first time, the new environment will become the earliest and most severe test for children. School is not only a place to teach books, but also a place to teach life knowledge and art. If parents don't tell their children how to get along with others, they will feel isolated as soon as they enter school. If children fail as soon as they enter school, it is a dangerous signal, not so much a failure of knowledge education as a failure of psychological education. This is also the reason why students with learning difficulties appear.
? 3. Children who can't stand straight: Many children can't stand straight and always lean on something. In fact, the question is not whether the child relies on something that can be made. The most important thing is that he always wants help and support.
? We should understand a person's personality characteristics, not through his views and ideas about himself, but through his actions in the environment to analyze his personality characteristics.
Punishment often does more harm than good to children.
? We will ask a child why he is lazy, but we can't get the root cause we know from him. Similarly, we will ask you why a child lies and we can't get the reason we want from him. Socrates said that the hardest thing for people is to know themselves. Even adults are like this. Who are we to ask a child to answer such a complicated question?
Examinations: Examinations have different meanings for different students. We often find that exams are extremely difficult for some students. Their faces turned white and red, stuttering and trembling. They are a little scared and their brains are blank. Some students are afraid to answer questions alone. They can only mix in the crowd because they are afraid that others will look at them. Sometimes it happens that two students in a class are secretly competing. They have jealous personalities.
? Being belittled, looked down upon and accused will make people lose self-confidence and aggravate children's inferiority complex. We should give children confidence and courage to face difficulties, otherwise we can't judge their ability and potential. If we intimidate them or even deprive them of their vision and expectation for the future, they can still live, but if we encourage them to gain courage, then they will achieve greater success.
6. Ordinary students and underachievers in the class: If we take coercive measures to awaken those children who have poor grades and have no lofty goals in our eyes to sleep, if these children still have courage, this method will sometimes work, but it is not suitable for universal use. Those children whose academic performance is near the bottom will be overwhelmed by this method, so they will become more stupid.
? 7. Special students in a certain aspect: If we find the bright spots of children at the beginning and encourage them to achieve the same results in other aspects, then our task will be much easier, and these children will often make many unexpected progress.
? 8. Eccentric students: These children will do some eccentric behaviors, such as stubbornness, stubbornness and irrationality. Although these performances can't win the teacher's praise, they can successfully attract the teacher's attention and even get the appreciation of other children. They will be proud of it and think they are great people. On the positive side, schools do have the obligation to educate and correct children's behavioral deviations, but on the negative side, schools are only the place where the disadvantages of children's early family education are exposed, and the roots are not in schools.
? 9. If a child habitually forgets to take or lose books, then we can judge that the child's school life is not smooth.
? 10. Our parents must never slander their children to their faces. When children grow up, they will grow into what parents often say. Some parents will swear when they are disappointed with their children, predict that their children can't have a bright future, or curse their children for being stupid and incompetent. When these children arrived at school, they found that all the predictions were confirmed one by one, and these children lacked the judgment and analysis ability to correct this wrong view, so they gave up the hope of success before they worked hard. They think this is an insurmountable obstacle, which further proves their ability defects.
? 1 1. Psychological explanation of lazy behavior: In fact, lazy children are enjoying the benefits of laziness, and they don't have to bear the expectations of others. Even if they have no grades, others will not be too hard on him. Because he doesn't want to work hard, he always shows an idle look, but his laziness has successfully attracted the attention of others, at least his parents have to worry about him. Many times, laziness is just a means for children to ease their situation. They always blame laziness for their lack of achievement. So people won't accuse children of being stupid. On the contrary, a child's family usually says that if the child is not lazy, there is nothing she can't do. Compared with stupidity, children prefer lazy evaluation, which is undoubtedly a good comfort for children without self-confidence. In short, what is laziness? Lack of confidence? An obstacle to our children has also become an excuse to prevent them from facing difficulties and avoiding them.
? 12. Some lazy children will suddenly become diligent and look brand-new after being understood. A child has made some unprecedented achievements, probably because the new teacher is more gentle than the original teacher, willing to understand him, talk to him sincerely, and give him new courage, instead of hurting his little self-confidence. It is almost sudden that children change from laziness to diligence. We often encounter a situation where children's learning has been stagnant, but they have become extremely diligent after changing to a new environment, mainly because the external environment has changed.
? 13. Some children speak late because they are spoiled and have no urgent need to speak. Children will naturally talk late.
? 14. Causes of stuttering: The cause of stuttering is not the external environment, but the conclusion of its perception of the external environment. Stuttering is easy to blush, which means that once he gets along with others, his tension will increase. This habit has been internalized as a part of the brain system. Many people who stutter speak fluently when they are angry and swear, and have no symptoms of stuttering at all. This fact proves that the key factor leading to stuttering is the relationship between stutterers and others. In other words, when the stutterer establishes contact with others and has to express himself with the help of language, his nervousness will follow.
? 15. Bedwetting will attract attention. Some children claim that they don't want to bid farewell to infancy and carefree days by not controlling their own urine and urine. They just use these tricks to gain the sympathy of their parents and teachers, although sometimes they will be laughed at by their partners. Children's behavior should not be regarded as a disease, which is only a manifestation of their inferiority complex, or a warning of their direction deviation when they pursue superiority. If we want them, we must first encourage them and help them rebuild their confidence.
? 16. Swearing will only make children more and more timid. The biggest mistake in educating children is not to swear at misguided children and assert that they will surely become bad in the future. This stupid evaluation has nothing to do with the change of the situation. Helping will only aggravate the child's Cherokee. On the contrary, we should encourage children to take the right path. Never think that humiliation can correct a child's behavior. Some children change their behavior because they are afraid of being humiliated and laughed at by others, but this is only the appearance.
? 17. If parents are timid, so are children, but this is not genetic, and it is more likely to be influenced by the timid family environment of parents.
? 18. The decisive factors that affect a child's growth are the external evaluation of him and his understanding of the world. We should evaluate their situation from the children's point of view and understand their situation with their wrong judgment. We shouldn't expect children to act according to the judgment standards of adults and expect them to never make mistakes. Is to realize that children often make mistakes in understanding their situation.
? 19. There is a hidden weakness behind any cruel behavior.
? If a child lags far behind other children in school, he would rather be considered lazy than incompetent or untalented.
? 2 1. Behavior explanation of children who like to humiliate others: If a child always likes to criticize and humiliate his classmates, we can think that the child's deliberate behavior of belittling others is actually a lack of self-confidence. In fact, this is how they cover up their weaknesses.
? 22. Individual psychology does not advocate taking too strict or too gentle methods to educate children. The correct way is to understand children's views, form correct values, encourage children to face and solve problems bravely, and cultivate their social feelings. If parents are too strict with their children, it will only hurt them and make them completely lose their fighting spirit. If parents spoil their children, they will encourage them to rely on others and strengthen their dependence psychology.
? 23. Disadvantages of children being alone for a long time. If children are lonely for a long time and lack participation in life and society, then in the end, their living environment will not only be relatively closed, but also psychologically closed. Their language ability is absolutely weaker than that of normal people, and their development is relatively slow. Only by returning to the group can they return to normal.
? 24. The influence of parents on children. Children's cognition of things is like a blank sheet of paper. They are in the learning stage and lack the ability to distinguish. If you are constantly hit, the child will inevitably lose confidence. If parents take care of their children's lives everywhere, children tend to be lazy. If parents often scold their children for trivial matters, children will often lie, and these parents will be more severe and tough on their children's words when they find out about their lying, which will only be counterproductive. However, in a family where children are always praised, when they grow up, they often feel that they are great and can't do it well at all.
? Because it's too late, I can't finish sorting it all at once. To be continued. I will take the time to continue to organize.