In fact, when parents have such concerns, they should ask their children's thoughts first, instead of judging their feelings from their own perspective. Maybe the kids don't feel anything.
However, if children feel unwelcome, unable to make friends or even feel inferior, then parents need to spend some thoughts to guide their children.
According to psychologist William Damon, children of different ages go through three different stages when making friends:
1, 4-7 years old, based on the friendship of others. Children at this stage are still in kindergarten. As long as we can have fun together and share happiness, we are basically friends. As for what kind of friends, children don't think too much.
2, 8- 10 years old, based on trust and friendship. At this stage, children have higher requirements for friendship. In the process of interacting with friends, they will be very concerned about what their friends think of them and whether they trust themselves.
3, 1 1- 15 years old, based on psychological close friendship. At this stage, children often make inseparable friends. They will share their worries together and have a high degree of intimacy.
Parents can understand their children's needs for friendship according to their age, and try to understand their real needs when talking to you about their friends' troubles.
I believe all parents want their children to be welcomed by the people around them. Sociable children naturally have many friends. So what are the social skills?
What abilities do social skills include?
1. Understanding and control of emotions. Children must first have a correct understanding of their emotions, and at the same time have certain emotional control ability.
2. The ability to understand the feelings of others. If you want to get along well with others, you must learn to look at the problem from the other side's point of view, so as to promote communication between the two sides.
3. Expression ability. If you want others to know yourself, you must have certain expressive ability, otherwise your own characteristics will not be visible to others at a glance. In the social process, self-expression is the first step to make friends.
4. Environmental adaptability. In the process of interpersonal communication, faced with complicated situations, they have certain adaptability, solve problems and promote the smooth progress of interpersonal communication.
How to help children improve their social skills?
1, parents want to improve their children's social skills, they should consciously help their children create a relaxed social environment, such as having guests at home, parents can encourage their children to receive guests, and children have favorite friends, which can help them date friends.
2. If children have good social performance, parents should praise and encourage them in time to help them build social self-confidence.
3. If children encounter difficulties in making friends, they can first encourage them to solve them themselves and help them develop the ability to solve problems independently. Of course, if it can't be solved, parents can also give their children some advice.