Misunderstandings and countermeasures of family rules education, sound personality is also an important aspect of children's development, and it is very important to relieve children's pressure appropriately. Educating children should also follow the laws of their physical and mental development, and improving their immunity requires a balanced diet. Let's share with you the misunderstandings and countermeasures of family planning education.

Misconceptions and Countermeasures in Family Planning Education 1 Misunderstanding 1: Parents can't set an example.

Children's initial awareness of rules often comes from the influence of family education environment. If adults just ask their children to obey the rules, but they can't set an example, then the establishment of rules in family education will inevitably lose its original weight.

Case 1: Mom made a strict schedule for 7-year-old Xiaohua at home. She goes to bed at 8 o'clock every night and has to get up at 7 o'clock in the morning. At first, Xiaohua was obedient and did as her mother said, but at night, when Xiaohua was about to fall asleep, the voice of mom and dad watching TV faintly came from the living room. Several times, Xiaohua woke up at 8 o'clock in the morning, and her mother was still sleeping in. Xiaohua had to run to her mother's bed and wake her up to cook for him. ...

Analysis and Strategy: Parents should consider whether they can make rules for their children. Xiaohua's parents fell into a misunderstanding when giving their children regular education: they only asked their children to go to bed and get up on time, but watched TV and slept late; Some parents ask their children to obey the traffic rules, but they run red lights at will. How can parents ask their children to do things they can't do? Even if such parents impose rules on their children, they will only get twice the result with half the effort and even lose their authority in serious cases. Therefore, when parents set rules for their children, they can't do what they say: they always "do things according to law" when they ask their children, but they are perfunctory when they ask themselves.

Myth 2: Family members' rules and education are inconsistent.

In modern society, the "April 21" family structure system is becoming more and more common. Four old people surround a child, and everyone is vying to treat the child as a treasure and please the child. In this family environment, even if parents want to set rules for their children, it is often grandparents who love their children the most. When caring for and taking care of children, grandparents and parents have the same goal, but they have different ideas in many aspects, so it is difficult to reach a consensus.

Case 2: Xixi's mother told 7-year-old Xixi very early that she had made a mistake and had to learn to take responsibility for herself. Once, Xixi played ball in the garden of the community. While he was having fun, he heard a bang. No, the ball hit the flowerpot on the balcony on the first floor and the flowerpot was broken. When Xixi was hesitating about what to do, grandma came over and said, "Good boy, leave this matter to grandma, and grandma will buy a new flowerpot to compensate others ..."

Analysis and Strategy: Han Fei, a great thinker in ancient China, said: "Husband and wife are in power, and children are at a loss." In the article, Xixi fell into a state of "being at a loss": the mother told the child to learn to take responsibility, but the grandmother took responsibility for him. Xixi was confused: "Who do I listen to?" Children have a strong insight into interpersonal relationships, so don't let them take advantage of their parents' differences to "opportunistic". Family alliance is the most powerful weapon to cultivate children's sense of rules, discipline and self-control. Therefore, parents should have the same requirements for their children. When there are differences between parents, don't argue in front of children. One party can compromise temporarily, and then find a suitable opportunity to communicate afterwards.

Myth 3: use substances and sticks to shape rules.

Now many parents always do whatever they want when making rules for their children. Use substances to induce children when they are in a good mood. When you are upset, you are forced by violence. Doing so will not only make children develop a correct sense of rules, but will destroy the parent-child relationship.

Case 3: Mingming's mother often changes her methods when making rules for 7-year-old Mingming: Sometimes she calls Mingming to eat, but Mingming doesn't listen. Her mother induces her with material, "Good boy, come and eat. When you are full, your mother will buy you transformers." Mingming went to eat happily. However, it was clear afterwards that mom kept asking you to eat it for your own good and often broke her word. Sometimes it's time to go to bed at night, but she still refuses to wash her feet and sleep. My mother will fly into a rage and threaten with violence. ...

Analysis and strategy: Make rules for children to make them understand, which he has to abide by. Let him realize the importance and necessity of obeying the rules from the heart, and don't use "variety" to coax and threaten children like a sober mother. If you obviously refuse to eat, parents may wish to adopt the "natural consequences education method" to make their children aware of the consequences of their actions and experience moderate pain and unhappiness. The child is hungry once or twice, and the next time he is asked to eat, he will certainly eat obediently; When a child refuses to leave the TV, parents can inform him in advance before he wants to watch TV, telling him that he can only watch TV for as long as he wants, and if he refuses, he will be rejected, and at the same time, he should be reasonable with a gentle attitude.

Myth 4: Make "excessive rules".

Some parents' educational ideas tend to go to the other extreme, that is, they hope to cultivate children who can worry less, cause less trouble and behave like adults. This kind of parent is very controlling. On the surface, they admit to respecting their children's wishes. This respect often takes effect only when children's wishes just meet their requirements. If the child is a little disobedient, it will force the child to obey the discipline, which will eventually lead to the child losing his autonomy and independence and turning to others for help when he encounters difficulties.

Case 4: Six-year-old Xiaoqi has entered the first grade of primary school. The school is only 400 meters away from Xiaoqi's home. Neighbors' children all go home together after school, but Xiaoqi's mother sets strict rules for Xiaoqi: if his mother doesn't pick him up, he can't go home; Xiaoqi is not allowed to go out to play on weekends. Even if the school organizes a spring outing, he can't attend ... In short, most of Xiaoqi's time is arranged by his parents, which eventually leads to Xiaoqi having no friends and reporting to his parents no matter what happens.

Analysis and Countermeasures: Many families restrict their children's freedom mostly because they are worried about their safety and overprotection, and because they are worried about their future development, they set various learning rules for their children. Xiaoqi's parents made too many rules, which restricted the development of Xiaoqi's autonomy, deprived him of his freedom and seriously hurt his children's self-esteem. Freedom without rules is laissez-faire, and rules without freedom are containment. These are all manifestations of lawlessness in family education. The ideal state is to grasp the tension between rules and freedom and let children grow freely in the rules. In this way, children have both rules and innovations.

Misunderstandings and countermeasures of family rules education II. Several family rules that children should obey.

1, rules to promote safety

Children certainly need rules to ensure their safety. And this sense of security includes physical and emotional security. Physical safety rules include "sit on the sofa (don't stand up)" and "don't open the door when mom takes a shower". Emotional safety rules may include "speaking in a gentle tone". When children feel safe, they will concentrate on exploring their talents and environment.

2. Rules for forming customs and practices

Children will do well when they have routines. Therefore, there should be some rules for children to develop healthy habits every day. For example, "brush your teeth after breakfast" or "put dirty clothes in the basket" Creating healthy habits and routines helps to reduce family conflicts. When children know that they should hang up their coats after school and do their homework after dinner, it will reduce a lot of arguments.

3. Rules to Promote Morality

Making rules gives you an opportunity to instill values and morality in your children. You should create some rules, such as "always tell the truth" or "say sorry when you hurt others". The key is that your children will imitate you by observing your behavior.

4. Be prepared to face the rules of the real world.

These rules teach children life skills, which will help them take care of themselves after leaving home. Teach his children about money, so that they can learn how to save and spend money wisely.

5. Rules for promoting social skills

Children also need some rules to teach them social skills. For example, "share your toys with your brother" or "take turns playing this game". In addition, teach children the appropriate ways to interact with others.