Teach children the solution to marital discord.
1. When children are present, try to avoid confrontation.
Don't blame each other easily, even if they don't educate their children well. Accusations can never convince people. Especially in the presence of children, both husband and wife have psychological needs to safeguard their dignity and authority. Simple accusations will not only lead to each other? War? There will be no other gains. Therefore, when there are children present, we must restrain each other. Less positive conflicts will have less negative impact on children's education.
2. Look for suitable opportunities afterwards and express your views in a suggested way.
To avoid confrontation, don't give up, but actively look for suitable opportunities and methods. There are always opportunities for husband and wife to exchange ideas and discuss problems. The other party's method of educating children is not appropriate. You should look for suitable opportunities afterwards and express your suggestions or opinions in a calm way. For example, if a wife forces her children to write and do arithmetic, you don't have to point it out on the spot, although you don't agree. You can ask such questions in a discussion tone when your wife is in a happy mood. What is the focus of education at this stage for the healthy growth of children? What is the positive significance of forcing children to write and do arithmetic? What are the negative effects? Through your careful guidance and repeated running-in with each other, the two will inevitably gradually converge on the issue of educating their children.
3. Inspire each other with vivid facts and raise awareness.
The fundamental difference between husband and wife in treating their children lies in their different understanding. If you think the other person has a wrong understanding of educating children, it is not enough for you to be reasonable. The reality is often that you have your reasons and he/she has his/her reasons. To increase persuasiveness, there are many vivid examples, which are often more effective than abstract truth. Therefore, you should read more books and periodicals about family education, collect more successful cases of educating children, and pay more attention to other people's successful practices and experiences in this area within your familiar range. When your heart is full of vivid examples of educating your children, you will not only benefit a lot, but also effectively influence your wife/husband.
4. Strive for each other's recognition with a positive attitude and successful educational practice.
Successful education needs to establish a correct educational concept, and it also needs to be reflected in concrete words and deeds anytime and anywhere. If you are sure that your educational philosophy is correct, then you should take active actions and tell your wife/husband what you want to do, what goals you want to achieve and what results you want to achieve. As long as you have a serious attitude, clear goals, detailed consideration and full confidence, the other party will not throw cold water on you, at least not resolutely stop you. And once you have achieved good results, the other party will suddenly realize in front of the facts, and their thoughts and understanding will be consistent.
Educate children about the solutions to marital discord.
First, manage your emotions. If you get angry, angry, quarrel or even accuse or attack because of disagreement or the other person disagrees with your point of view, it will not only be conducive to solving the children's education problems, but also because of yourself? A role model? Let children take a casual look and keep it in mind when they meet and resolve differences? The way adults solve problems? Inheriting it will affect his future interpersonal communication and family life when he grows up. Therefore, when you disagree with the other party, you should learn to treat it with a normal heart and avoid turning simple phenomena into sharp contradictions.
Second, we must avoid children coordinating alone. Children who grow up in an unharmonious family environment are more likely to have personality defects, and quarreling and belittling will not only hurt each other's authority in family education. As the child grows older, both husband and wife will lose respect for the child. Therefore, in comparison, temporary concession is far less harmful to children than fighting in front of them.
Third, listen carefully to each other's reasons and understand each other's real thoughts. The most effective way to make the other party listen to their own ideas and accept their own opinions is not to force them to listen to what they say, but to let them feel respect from themselves first. First, they should listen to each other's opinions and reasons carefully and quietly, and understand each other's real thoughts.
Fourth, pay attention to methods and communicate effectively. Effective communication can't be centralized at the beginning, thinking that only oneself is correct, and the other party must listen to oneself and cooperate with oneself. In fact, the starting point of any couple's education for their children is love for their children. Differences only come from different values and different perspectives. There is no essential opposition and there is no absolute right or wrong. Secondly, the atmosphere of communication is very important. Real communication should take the opportunity to move, each other has time and is willing to show sincerity and exchange views on an equal footing. The atmosphere should be formal and relaxed.
An important reason for the failure of education
1. These effects cancel each other out. To educate children effectively, parents must work together to form a joint force. If parents disagree, no one can convince anyone, and the result will inevitably weaken the influence of the other party on the children.
2. Parents' prestige is reduced. The quarrel between parents, especially mutual denial, will not only make children feel disappointed with their parents, but also destroy their image in the eyes of children and reduce their prestige.
The children are at a loss. Children often unconsciously regard their parents as the objects of imitation and incorporate their parents' behavior into their own behavior patterns. Parents have different opinions, different behaviors and even serious differences and fierce conflicts, which will inevitably make children at a loss.
Guess you like:
2. How should both husband and wife educate their children?
3. What do couples need to cooperate in educating their children?
4. How to educate children not to spend money indiscriminately
5. What should the husband and wife do if they quarrel about educating their children?