(A) according to the actual situation of students, formulate practical learning goals.
Our parents and teachers believe in the creed of high standards and strict requirements, and believe that only in this way can children have a bright future. In fact, excessive demands not only bring great psychological pressure to children, but also make children feel frustrated. For some children, despite their efforts, they still can't meet the requirements of parents and teachers. However, in the eyes of teachers and parents, they only see that their grades are not ideal and they have not achieved their expected results, but they have not seen the efforts made by their children. Teachers and parents not only don't reflect on whether they are asking too much of their children from their own perspective, but think that children don't pay attention to their own thoughts, and only through repeated ideological education can they be effective. In order to attract children's ideological attention, teachers quoted classics and talked about the importance of learning. Parents made a big settlement with their children with grief-they paid a lot of effort and cost to their children. Regardless of their good intentions, it is not an exaggeration to say that these practices are "mental abuse." Taking success or failure as a hero's assessment standard not only makes children lose their enthusiasm for continuing to pursue success, but also lays a curse for their mental health problems. Only according to the actual situation of children, it is an effective method to formulate practical learning goals for children.
When setting learning goals, children must be allowed to fully express their opinions instead of accepting them all at once. Teachers or parents have the final say. It is worth noting that parents often overestimate their children's learning ability. Everyone thinks that their children are the best, which is understandable; But there are individual differences in learning ability, which is an objective fact, and we must accept this reality. In addition, in the process of achieving learning goals, teachers and parents should not only play the role of senior supervisors, but also play the role of supporters. In a sense, moral support is more important than simple material support. On this issue, some parents often make the mistake that they use norms to meet their children's learning and living conditions, and they also have the absolute right to give orders to their children's learning. This is not so much to educate their children as to make a deal with them. In the end, you may still be unable to realize your wish.
(B) to cultivate the ability to withstand setbacks
A person's life can't be smooth sailing, and there will always be difficulties of one kind or another. Therefore, we don't want to reduce the frustration situations that children may encounter, but to help children treat difficulties and setbacks in the right way and mentality. First of all, we should abandon the wrong idea that encountering setbacks is a disgraceful thing. Although we often say that "failure is the mother of success", in fact, we still judge heroes by success or failure, especially in academic performance. If you do well in the exam, there are not only various material rewards given by your parents, but also praise and love given by your teacher. Once you don't do well in the exam, you will not only be looked down upon by your parents, but also be criticized mercilessly by your teacher. This invisibly makes children realize that only success can get recognition from others, and once failure means hopelessness. Excessive fear of failure often leads to test anxiety and even test fear. This is true not only for students with poor academic performance, but also for students with good academic performance. Once there was a primary school student who had been doing well in school, telling his distress to the psychological hotline.
He said that although he was loved by teachers and parents because of his good grades, he felt very happy. In fact, he had a hard time, because in the eyes of parents and teachers, he is synonymous with success, and failure can't happen to him. To this end, he must work harder to maintain his image; Otherwise, once something goes wrong, blame will follow. There is such a heavy psychological burden at an early age, and it is not surprising that psychological problems appear over time. On the one hand, it is very important to treat setbacks correctly. Some children always tend to blame setbacks on the outside world or others, and never realize their responsibilities. Over time, it is easy to get into the bad habit of shirking responsibility and blaming others.
(C) cultivate the ability of emotional control
Being good at regulating and controlling one's emotions will help primary school students establish good interpersonal relationships, which will be beneficial to their mental health. The interpersonal conflict of primary school students is largely due to the inability to control their emotions at that time, especially the impulsive primary school students. Therefore, teachers should seize the opportunity in time and teach primary school students some simple and easy methods and strategies for emotional adjustment. For example, for those students who are impulsive, you can ask a steady classmate to remind themselves before they are emotional; When you feel too stressed, you can relieve it by keeping a diary and talking. When you are depressed, you can listen to music and take a walk. Pupils have mastered some specific emotional control methods, which can greatly reduce the possibility of psychological problems.
(4) Accept yourself
Accepting yourself is based on an objective and correct understanding of yourself. It's hard for a person who can't know himself correctly to accept himself. Because accepting yourself means being able to tolerate your own shortcomings and deficiencies. As the saying goes, "no one is perfect, and gold is not enough." Everyone has more or less shortcomings, which is a normal phenomenon and an inherent need for people to keep learning and improve their own quality. Tolerating your own shortcomings does not mean turning a blind eye to them, but taking positive actions to make up for and overcome them on the premise of acknowledging your own shortcomings. People who can't accept themselves are prone to self-destruction or form a strong sense of inferiority. To make primary school students accept themselves, on the one hand, they must have the ability of self-reflection and evaluation. The purpose of comparing with others is not to label myself as "I am a poor student" and "I am a person who is not liked by everyone". But through comparison, we should realize our position in the group and look for the direction of future efforts. On the other hand, parents and teachers should correctly evaluate their children. Some teachers only pay attention to grades when evaluating students, and other strengths and advantages are completely ignored. When educating their children, some parents always preach with the advantages of many people around them, such as "XXX's study is better than yours, XXX's calligraphy is better than yours, and XXX's piano level is better than yours". After hearing these words, children may feel that they are simply useless. It's no use trying anyway, just give up. However, this is not the case. Students who study well in physical education are not necessarily better than your children, and students who study well are not necessarily better than your children. Every child has his own bright spot. As parents and teachers, we should not only criticize our children, but also give them a perspective to know themselves. From this perspective, they can see both bright spots and shortcomings, and there is no blind spot in any aspect.
(5) Learn to communicate with others.
Everyone lives in society and needs the care, support and attention of others, so it is inevitable to communicate with others. Good interpersonal relationship is not only an indispensable condition for mental health, but also an important way to obtain mental health. Therefore, it is very necessary for primary school students to learn how to communicate with others. First of all, let primary school students know each other's rights and responsibilities in interpersonal communication, treat each other as equals and respect others as they respect themselves. Secondly, be willing to associate with others, be able to cooperate with peers, and be able to communicate with teachers and parents. At the same time, in interpersonal communication, we should not only consider our own needs, but also care about others' needs and understand others. Thirdly, primary school students should have correct communication skills and effective communication attitude, tolerate others, praise others sincerely and accept well-intentioned criticism. Finally, let primary school students keep their personality independent and complete in interpersonal communication. Because of the different living environment, everyone has his own unique personality and behavior pattern. When dealing with others, he can accommodate others appropriately. Easy-going attitude is necessary in interpersonal communication, but this accommodation is limited. Easy-going doesn't mean giving up principles, let alone losing his complete personality.
(six) to cultivate good moral behavior habits
Primary school is the period when moral behavior habits are formed. Starting with the cultivation of moral behavior habits is also the most effective way to develop primary school students' morality. To cultivate good moral behavior habits, we must first formulate specific and detailed behavior norms. Because of the limited moral knowledge, primary school students can't judge right and wrong, good and evil in many things, so they must rely on specific codes of conduct to guide them. Many pupils make mistakes not because they deliberately make mistakes, but because they don't realize that their actions are wrong. Therefore, when children make mistakes, don't just criticize and educate the big principles, but tell them exactly where they are wrong, so that they won't make the same mistakes next time. Secondly, in the process of implementing the code of conduct, teachers should be patient and fair. Pupils often violate the code of conduct involuntarily because of their poor self-control. Therefore, teachers should be patient and not impatient. After several patient demonstrations, they will consciously abide by the code of conduct. The implementation of the code of conduct should be not only strict, but also fair. Some teachers are lenient because students with good grades have violated the code of conduct. This will certainly save face for some students, but it will reduce the prestige of teachers among most students, which is not conducive to future work. Third, we should set an example. Setting an example is also an important way to cultivate good moral behavior habits. The purpose of setting an example is to guide students to learn from it, not to build an unattainable moral peak in front of students. Therefore, when setting an example, we should not blindly look for those tall, burly and comprehensive figures. You can set an example that students can directly perceive in the crowd, so that students can find the starting point of learning. In short, in order to make primary school students develop physically and mentally in an all-round way, we must proceed from reality, fully implement the Guiding Outline of Mental Health Education in Primary and Secondary Schools of the Ministry of Education, popularize mental health knowledge in a targeted manner, strengthen mental health education, solve practical problems, and effectively improve the mental health level of primary school students.