(1) According to some research at home and abroad, Liu Jinhua, a China scholar, thinks that there are two dimensions to evaluate parents' parenting style: control (whether children are required to be mature) and love (whether they care, trust and understand children). According to these two dimensions, parents' parenting styles can be divided into four types: authoritative, authoritarian, doting and indifferent.

1, authority-control+love (accept) parents' positive attitude towards children, respond enthusiastically to children's demands, wishes and behaviors, respect children's opinions and opinions, encourage children to express their ideas and participate in discussions; Parents have clear requirements for their children, and when they are dissatisfied with their children's bad behavior, they will persuade and educate them in strict accordance with the rules; And show sincere support and affirmation for its good behavior. This warm parenting style with high control and easy acceptance of emotions has a positive impact on children's character development, and it is easy for children to form a kind, gentle, emotionally stable and thoughtful character or an independent, straightforward and active cooperative character.

2, authoritarian type-control+not love (rejection) control is more than enough, love is not enough. This is a highly controlled parenting style, but emotionally parents tend to refuse and are indifferent to their children. Parents often show a lack of enthusiastic emotional response and rarely consider their own wishes and demands; Restrict children's every move and ask them to abide by relevant rules unconditionally. If they break the rules, parents will take tough measures, and some even use violence. Children who grow up like this often have fear and lack self-confidence.

3. Spoiled-uncontrolled+totally irrational love, lacking control. Parents love their children in every way, spoil them too much, let them have the final say, and promise everything without thinking. For example, there is a laid-off female worker who always bargains with vendors when she buys food at the market. If she can save a penny, she won't be willing to buy good quality food. However, shopping with children makes me "generous". I'll buy whatever the child wants, a few hundred dollars at a time. This kind of upbringing leads to the distortion of children's behavior and personality, which makes children form strong impulsive and aggressive psychological behaviors, lack independence and sense of responsibility, be lazy, selfish, willful, coquetry and do whatever they want, and form a series of behavior habits and personality characteristics that are not suitable for social requirements.

4. Indifferent type-not controlling+not loving parents' lack of affection and positive response to their children, and lack of behavioral requirements and control. There is little communication between parents and children, and parents lack basic attention and understanding to their children, and take a non-interference attitude towards all their behaviors, giving them a feeling of being ignored. In this way, children are prone to form strong impulsiveness, aggression, disobedience, arrogance, arrogance, arrogance and self-righteousness, which is easy to cause bad behavior problems in adolescence.

(2) Chinese educator Cheng Huashan studied the influence of parental rearing patterns on children's development in Shanghai kindergarten. By classifying the parents of 4-year-old children's 20 1 score in the two dimensions of "authority" and "care", five parenting styles are obtained: doting, neglecting, strict, caring and rational. Similar to the four types divided by Liu Jinhua from the two dimensions of "control" and "love", the doting type is similar to the doting type; Neglect type is similar to indifference type; Strict type is similar to authoritarian type; The combination of caring and rational is similar to authoritative.

(3) According to the analysis of the above educators' conclusions, I think the authoritative parenting style is the most ideal for parents. Because this kind of parenting is to treat children with a democratic and equal attitude and respect and care for children. Combine leniency with severity and treat children as individuals with equal status. They can't control their children at will, nor can they be completely out of control. Instead, it puts forward moderate requirements for children, provides necessary care and help, and promotes the all-round development of children. For example, after the child just comes home from kindergarten, parents can let the child play for about half an hour according to the child's preferences, and then draw and listen to stories, instead of forcing the child to draw and listen to stories before playing; At least what the child is playing with and with whom, as long as it is not dangerous, parents can leave it alone and let it play freely. Parents are children's mentors and friends. They should allow their children to do what they want. They shouldn't be forced. They should live in harmony with their children, singing, dancing, telling stories and watching cartoons with them. Authoritative parenting can promote the healthy development of children. Educated children can get along well with others, be considerate, be naive and lively, be emotionally stable, be confident and self-reliant, be independent and tolerant, and be sensible. Therefore, parents should establish a positive attitude, give a good influence on their children's correct upbringing and promote the healthy development of their personality.