Why are there so many problems? This is all caused by the wrong way parents educate their children. There are eight ways for parents to make mistakes. What kind of parents do you belong to? Please correct me.
1, seeking medical advice (this kind of parents love to learn, listen to many lectures, buy many books and audio, and read many books and materials, but they just lack action and fail to educate their children. Typical excitement when listening, excitement when thinking, and motionless when going home. What's the use of learning without doing it? Nothing can be done without action. Yangming's theory of mind is rational, practical and practical. That is, after understanding the truth, we should move towards the unity of knowing and doing, affirm and practice, so as to reach a certain level. Educating children can't just talk without practice, it depends on our actions. To give you a word, people are great because of dreams, change because of learning, and succeed because of actions. Come on, learn quickly and act. )
2. Think hard and be afraid of difficulties (this kind of parents are characterized by their love of learning, their actions but their inability to persist, and their like to set obstacles for themselves, such as being busy, having no time and being too tired. . Parents, educating children is a quiet process. We need to stick to our work, especially in educating children. A good habit can be formed not in three days, but in five days, which takes 2 1 day every day. Educating children doesn't happen overnight. We need persistence and perseverance, just like a drop of water wears away a stone. It is not how powerful the water is, but the power of persistence, so we must persist, and persistence is victory. )
3. Self-righteous type (This type of parents are characterized by not accepting new ideas and traditional educational methods and concepts, and are self-righteous. Most of them are now: depressed, condescending, rude, and everything is arranged. I often say that my dad hit me like this when he was young, and he hit me like this when he did something wrong. That's how I should educate my children. Am I wrong? But think about it, 30 years ago, there was no food, no high-speed rail and no Internet. Now society has changed. There used to be several children who lacked material conditions. Today's children are not short of material and spiritual companionship and education, so the way of education should also be changed. So the news often reports that children run away from home, self-harm, suicide, depression, even killing their parents, stealing, hitting the wall, playing truant and so on, all of which are related to our education. Therefore, it is necessary to learn new educational concepts and cultivate your children with modern, scientific and present educational methods suitable for your children's personality. )
4, blame type (this kind of parents are more, like nagging, like to compare, satirize children, can't see the advantages of children, always see the shortcomings of children, often say, why are you so disobedient, don't do your homework well, look at others, be more obedient and more conscious, learn from others, they will be in the top three in the exam, you are stupid, what can you do, how can you have you? Growing up in such an environment, children will lose self-confidence, inferiority, interest in learning, love to talk, love to lie, love rebellion, poor parent-child relationship, and even run away from home. Why is this happening? According to the data, 45.5% of the children in China committed suicide due to excessive study pressure, and 22.7% committed suicide due to puppy love. Suicide due to parents' divorce accounted for 13.6%. 40.3% of the children who committed suicide were about 12 years old. How to educate children well? Less comparison, less criticism, more affirmation and praise of children are the basis for building children's self-confidence and the way for children to move in the right direction, adhere to positive guidance and encourage education)
5, arranged (such parents are eager for their children to make a fortune, and their daughters are phoenix nirvana. They have taken care of everything they can from an early age, such as tidying up their schoolbags, clothes, washing socks, doing housework and so on. After a long time, children will have a dependence on their families. This kind of parents, under the banner of love, virtually cut off the wings of children's growth. So slowly relying on it has become a habit. After 30 years, children don't go to work and play games every day. When parents are old, they work hard to feed this child and become a new generation of neets. So I suggest that you let your children do more housework and work, let them do their own things, form the habit of self-reliance from an early age, and let them understand that relying on their parents is not a hero. It doesn't matter to him that everything is done by his parents now. When they grow up, they have to work hard by themselves. The so-called morality can carry things and do more housework, and the employment rate will be high in the future. Harvard University will do a research. The employment rate of those who can and can't do housework is 15: 1. The crime rates of the former and the latter are 1: 15. At the same time, doing housework can also exercise children's practical ability and sense of responsibility. If a person doesn't even take responsibility for his family, how can he take responsibility for the school, society and country in the future? So don't underestimate doing housework. )
6, doting (now living conditions are good, each family has 1 child, six adults around a child, unlike the sixties and seventies, when there were many children at home and they were still poor. There is nothing to eat or drink, but nowadays children can buy anything they want, except the stars in the sky. The whole family, old and young, let him spoil her and spoil him. On the surface, it is a performance of loving children, but it hurts children and develops a lazy, selfish, self-centered and willful character. This kind of personality will be difficult to adapt to the society in the future, and it will not be hit, and its ability to resist setbacks is extremely poor. Is irresponsible, adversity quotient is very poor. If a person wants to succeed, how can he adapt to the social workplace and future work without this sense of responsibility and the ability to be hit? Therefore, parents are advised not to spoil their children and encourage them to do more. Even if they don't do well, it doesn't matter, they can exercise their ability to resist setbacks. Children can also take part in a sport, such as martial arts, taekwondo, basketball and so on. Exercise your mind through physical exercise. Mao Zedong said that it is necessary to have a savage physique and a civilized spirit. Mencius said, "Heaven will take great responsibility for the people of Sri Lanka, so we must first suffer their minds, work their bones and muscles, and starve their bodies and skins.". In fact, adults understand these truths, but they just don't do it and don't want their children to suffer. They didn't suffer hardships when they were young, but they became white wolves when they grew up, and it was too late to regret it. )
7. Rough type (This type of education means four words: beating, scolding, training and punishment. This kind of education will lead to children's depression. Children will feel inferior, insecure, timid, lie, dare not speak, rebel, autistic, addicted to online games, puppy love, insecure, and even appear: fighting, stealing, running away from home, self-mutilation, suicide, truancy, drug abuse, fighting, etc. Many children are timid and introverted since childhood, and 99% of them are caused by their mothers being strong, simple and rude, demanding too much and not learning new educational methods.
8. Laissez-faire (Laissez-faire is divided into physical laissez-faire and mental laissez-faire. Physical laissez-faire means that children are absent for a long time, which will lead to the following problems: self-confidence, autism, unsociable, talkative, insecure, poor communication skills, inattention and so on. Spiritual laissez-faire means that children are around their parents, but parents show material concern for them. This means that children know how to earn money but ignore spiritual communication with their parents, do not care about their inner needs, blindly ask their children and never listen to their words, which leads to their inner emptiness and lack of parental love. The following situations appear: puppy love, violence, lying, Oedipus complex and so on. Therefore, parents should do three things at a time.
2, body language, when picking up children, regardless of the size of the child, give the child body language. Promoting parent-child relationship, such as smiling, holding hands, hugging him and patting him, can promote parent-child relationship and make children not lack self-confidence. 3. Learn to listen. Many parents never listen to what their children say, don't understand them, listen more, go into their inner world, understand them, and make their hearts full of love. Educating children is like fighting a soldier. Be sure to plan ahead, and don't wait for the children to have problems before educating them. At that time, children were everything to us. No matter how rich and capable we are, as long as our children have problems, education will fail. No matter how much money we earn, no matter how much our officials do, we can't take anything away after death, only a sigh will be taken away. Again, there is only one life, and life cannot be repeated. No matter how successful unemployment is, it cannot make up for the failure of education. Only by grasping the education of children now and parents studying hard can children make progress every day.
Junquan Road-Veterans do education and care from the motherland.