One of the four methods of family education for junior high school students
First, the image appeal method.
Educational practice has proved: "It is better to set a realistic learning goal than to shout loudly." . The goals set for children should not only adhere to high standards and strict requirements, but also be achieved through hard work; There should be both annual goals and monthly and weekly short-term goals. While defining the overall goal, we should also set small goals to be completed day by day according to the subjects, realize and break through them in turn, and constantly "refuel" and encourage them to go step by step like going up the stairs. In order to keep children's goals in mind, parents can make a list of grades, use the school-parent contact book, and use curves to intuitively reflect their children's exams and test results on the coordinates, so that children and parents can see at a glance. For subjects that fail to meet the standards, parents should make up lessons or ask for help in time. Educational practice ". Many children are academically gifted, honest, diligent and polite, which is the result of school and social education, but more importantly, good family education and parents' exemplary role have a strong appeal to children's healthy growth. Therefore, as long as parents strengthen the consciousness of "teaching children to serve the country", work hard, study hard, constantly improve their own quality and set a good example for their children, they will certainly bring out your ideal children.
Second, heart-to-heart counseling.
As the saying goes, "knowing a son is like a father." Parents should talk to their children in time about their psychological and ideological problems exposed at different times and for different reasons. In daily life, parents should do "three diligence", that is, be diligent in understanding their children's thoughts in learning; Observe the child's psychological state in learning; Diligent in heart-to-heart, dredge children's thoughts in time. For those who can't keep up with their studies at different stages because of poor physical fitness, we should encourage them more and blame them less to help them "catch up with the team"; For those who are bored because they are not interested in learning subjects, they should be beaten hard and guided more to help enhance their interest; For those who are discouraged by unsatisfactory test results, we should calmly help them analyze the reasons, find the crux and boost their morale; For disputes with classmates and teachers at school that affect learning motivation, we should help patiently and resolve them enthusiastically. In addition, when talking with children, parents should not only tell them how to do it, but also let them understand why they want to do it, convince others by reasoning, and choose the right occasion in the way of talking, so as to achieve better results.
Third, the reward and punishment incentive method.
On the premise of ideological education, using rewards and criticisms is also an effective way to mobilize students' enthusiasm. Rewards should be based on spiritual rewards, supplemented by material rewards. For example, children have achieved excellent results in the wide examination. On the basis of school rewards, parents can verbally praise, inform relatives and friends, expand the scope of praise, give priority to buying school supplies and daily necessities, and visit parks, play video games (at home) and watch movies. If you don't study hard and do badly in the exam, you will be severely criticized and punished. Make children always have a kind of learning pressure, effectively change the phenomenon of "learning well and learning badly, learning not, learning more and learning less", and create a glorious fashion of seeking knowledge and making progress.
Fourth, the life adjustment method.
Strong physique and full spirit are the basic conditions for doing a good job in learning. Parents should pay attention to scientific methods, adjust their children's lives, let their children eat and have fun under limited conditions, and create an environment conducive to giving play to their intellectual advantages. Parents should take advantage of holidays, work and study breaks to organize family sports competitions, story meetings, knowledge contests, group outings, etc. to adjust their children's lives. At the same time, according to the child's physiological endurance, we should arrange the study scientifically, so as to relax and combine work and rest, and ensure that the child can devote himself to the study with full enthusiasm and vigorous energy.
Common educational mistakes of parents II
1. Parents place too high expectations on their children and pursue perfection.
Because parents don't want to disappoint themselves, they keep putting pressure on their children. When a child caters to his parents' expectations, he loses himself and his life is no longer comfortable and smooth. He can only firmly grasp his "Excellence" at such a high price. Such an "excellent" child is a bomb that will be detonated at any time, either hurting others or blowing itself up. According to statistics, 23% of mentally ill children in universities are recognized as "excellent" in junior and senior high schools. But children are very different. Even if they are coerced, many of them can't meet their parents' expectations, resulting in inferiority and rebellious psychology.
2. When the child is dissatisfied with himself, despise and punish him.
In fact, children feel guilty when they can't satisfy their parents. At this time, parents will scold him again, turn guilt into disgust, and then break the jar. Otherwise, it is temporarily forbearing but burying the introduction of mental illness, which may break out at any time.
3. Compare your children with others.
This is a common problem of most parents. When parents often compare their children with other people's children, children will also think they are incompetent, thus losing self-confidence and moving towards inferiority.
4. Conditionally meet the needs of children.
Buy sneakers first in the exam! When you enter the top five, we will travel as a family! Many parents regard this as a reasonable and enlightened reward and punishment measure for their children! As everyone knows, the subconscious message this brings to children is that they are loved only if they meet their parents' standards. Then children will pay the price of losing themselves in order to get the love of their parents!
5. Predict that children are worthless
Predicting that a child is worthless has two consequences. First, the more you say that he is worthless, the more worthless he is, completely losing his fighting spirit and learning ability, and finally realizing your prediction! Another kind of child, the more you say that he is worthless, the more he has to prove that he is promising, but if he lives in "proof" all his life, he will lose himself and lose his wisdom and happiness in life.
Step 6 make choices instead of children
There are three stages of children's psychological independence, namely, 3 years old, 9 years old and 12 years old. Children eat by themselves, parents should care and not interfere. Don't say eat all your clothes. Let me feed them! Or what clothes the child wants to wear, you have to choose for him! It is also unwise to quietly sign up for piano classes for children. Parents are always manipulating their children with their own brains, ignoring the process of substitution, which is the process of depriving children of growth. When you deprive your child of some aspect of growth, the child loses some ability.
7. Don't trust children
I don't think children have the ability to control, and I don't think children can actually do it, which completely destroys children's self-esteem and self-motivation. To train children into "talents", we must first make them "adults", otherwise there will only be more and more problem children.
Summary: The process of parents educating their children is the process of adjusting their state to peace and joy. The state of peace and happiness is love! The process of educating children is also a process of broadening the mind. It is easy to change a child. If you "accommodate" a child, the child will "change"