The leaves fall to the roots.
Recently, I heard that many teenagers suffer from depression, and we saw four with our own eyes. Two boys in our bay have been depressed and crazy for more than ten years, and now they can basically live a normal life after treatment.
We collectively raised money for the crazy girl in the bay, and in the afternoon the village sent a car to the hospital.
It is worrying to think that a ten-year-old girl's depression has deteriorated into madness. This is the second crazy girl in our bay this year. She and 18 years old both started from depression, and gradually their symptoms became worse and they began to go crazy. This tragedy is not a case. I've heard too many such cases around me recently. Why are young people so easily depressed now? Is this society putting too much pressure on them? Or do they expect too much from the world themselves? Once the expectations in my heart can't reach the goal, I will be sad and depressed? Or do parents usually accompany too little? Neglect children's mental health education? I think these are all things that our precious mothers should pay attention to!
Two patients with depression in our bay have two things in common: one is young, starting in their teens, and the other is poor family environment. Adults are busy living and making money, and children's learning and growth are hardly asked. I don't know much about the patients who were sent away this afternoon, because their families usually live in Xiaogan and their parents make a living by collecting waste products. Although I used to know her parents very well, we seldom met for more than ten years, so we couldn't get to know each other. Just heard from her own uncle that the child's mother is busy with business during the day and plays mahjong at night. The girl was frustrated in falling in love at school last year and began to get sick. This year, her parents had operations one after another, but they didn't have time and energy to take care of her. Her condition has also deteriorated until now. [Tears] [Tears] [Tears] [Tears] [Tears] [Tears]
The father of the child is slow, not stupid, not flexible, tall and big, and is a coolie. Her mother is a girl with a different surname in this bay. She can speak with her mouth, but her heart still belongs to that kind of thought. The child's uncle is the richest man here, with assets of hundreds of millions. Last year, we spent more than 3 million yuan to build a villa in our bay, which can be called a mansion. Until now, it has not been completely completed. Why mention the child's uncle here? Because the child's illness has something to do with this. At first, the child's uncle relied on his parents and younger brother to chop wood and sell it for him to finish his studies, then he got married and started a business, and finally became the richest man here. Because the IQ and social status of the two brothers are very different, the old parents have completely different attitudes towards their two sons and daughters-in-law, including grandchildren. Everyone can see this. In fact, this is a cruel reality. Not all parents love their children equally.
The child is in our Murakami primary school. When she was in junior high school, her parents went to the county to work for her uncle's family, and her children were transferred to the county. I don't know that after less than half a year, the relationship between mom and dad and their uncles and aunts was not good. The husband and wife went to other places to work, but left their children in the county to study. Her uncle vacated a house for her to live alone. She usually eats at school, eats at her uncle's house on weekends and lives alone in the community at night. Such a residence is three years. In fact, when the child went home for the New Year on the first day, everyone saw that something was wrong with the child. Originally lively and cheerful children became silent, staying in the upstairs room every day, unwilling to talk to their parents, and even resentful. The child's uncle grew up with my Mr. Yun, and he talked to me about this problem. He said that at the end of the first grade, the child told him that he didn't want to live in his uncle's house, because every time he went back to eat, he felt very scared, afraid of his uncle's eyes, his aunt's nagging, and his cousin's arrogance and contempt. Her name is uncle, her mother, and she wants to transfer to her hometown. The child's uncle also told her sister and husband that the opinions of her sister and brother-in-law were quite unified and could not be transferred back. Because I have to leave a person to take care of her when I come back to study, it reduces my family's income. The father of the child thinks that his younger brother is as developed as he is today and he works hard. Why can't his daughter live in his house? I can't live without food, and I won't eat without food. He thinks it is natural for his daughter to eat and live in her brother's house ... How can this confused parent know that her daughter's psychology has been greatly impacted and hurt at this moment! How can this teenager understand and bear the differences between parents and uncles and aunts in IQ culture, economic ability and social and family status? Slowly, the child becomes depressed. From the second day of self-isolation to madness last year, in recent years, children actually have the opportunity of treatment and the possibility of recovery. But ignorant and incompetent parents didn't pay attention to it, thinking that their children didn't like to talk when they grew up. In this way, a 18-year-old girl is crazy enough to cry at home every day, either laughing or wanting to die, and everyone feels sad and sorry.
Many people question me, why do you still be a full-time mother when your family is not rich? Even people in the bay say I'm lazy. I disdain to explain many things, and I don't know how to explain them. Because I am a stay-at-home mother, they may not understand and see my hard work and anxiety. Many things we stand in different angles and have different goals in life, so we can't reach an agreement, so I always choose not to explain them. I grew up a girl myself. The lack of my mother's company in my childhood and adolescence greatly affected my mental health, which led me to run away from home and ruined my future. I have a say in pain and despair than anyone else. My child, I can't just let go. It doesn't matter if I am poor for a while, but once I cause some tragedies, there is nothing I can do. So my husband and wife unanimously decided that no matter how difficult it was, I would be a full-time mother. The accompanying growth of parents is the greatest love and care for children, which we both agree.
Although I have been a full-time mother, I still owe two girls six years. She was sent to her grandfather's house in the first grade until she went to college. My husband and wife have been absent from their children's accompanying education for six years, and I am full of guilt for my children. I used to think that what I gave her was the best, because she had no worries about food and clothing at her grandfather's place, and her grandparents loved her uncles and aunts, and they all had nannies to take care of her meals and clothes. She lives like a princess. But I didn't expect my children to be eager for my company and care. Later, her personality and psychology were still somewhat flawed.
Once, my little daughter and my second sister made a video, complaining to my second sister that I was too strict and demanding in her discipline, and even had to take care of eating ... My second girl said to her sister in tears at that time, you should cherish your blessing, maybe I can't get your mother's strength today ... At that moment, I realized that I owed the second girl after all! No matter how good grandparents are, no matter how superior the living environment is, they can't replace their mother's company ... At that moment, I realized that it might be a mistake to send my children to grandparents to study. I thought I gave my child the best, but that wasn't necessarily what she wanted most. I ignored her feelings. ...
The second girl was depressed when she was a sophomore, so serious that she went to see a psychologist herself. The doctor diagnosed her as moderately depressed and prescribed many drugs to control her medication. The child reported good news without worrying, and kept it from me, but I watched the video with the child and found that the child's mood was very wrong. I slowly communicate with her and talk to her. She said that she had no motivation to do anything, felt that life was meaningless and suffered from severe insomnia. I immediately felt that the problem was serious. I called her tutor and asked her to take a week off to go back to Wuhan. In seven or eight days, I didn't say anything, so I accompanied her to Jianghan Road to eat delicious food, Hanzheng Street to buy clothes, and went out to play around. Her mood has obviously changed. The next night, when she decided to go back to school, I took two sisters on a cruise to the beach and talked a lot with my children along the way. First of all, I solemnly say sorry to my children. Mom and dad owe you an apology. I sent you to study at Grandpa's, not because my parents abandoned you and hurt my sister, but because I wanted to give you a better living and learning environment, hoping that you would go further and fly higher. Although the starting point is good, I didn't consider your feelings. As a mother, I lost my company for six years when you were growing up. My daughter hugged me and cried. I can only say I'm sorry. On the cruise, I told my children that you have gone to college, and sooner or later you will leave grandpa's world and return to your own life. Obviously, your grandparents gave you a living environment that neither your father nor I can afford. This is a reality that I can't change at present. You can either create something better yourself or you can only accept it. Grandpa's excellent environment today is the result of his own efforts, and neither you nor I have the right to enjoy it calmly. Grandpa owes his mother too much. Because of your own Excellence, grandpa took you over to raise and educate yourself. We can only be grateful, not greedy. Mom wants you to see your position clearly, don't be greedy and don't compare with others. Only in this way can there be no gap in your heart and you can face the future life calmly. We all love you very much, whether it's mom and dad or grandparents and uncles, but we can only accompany you for a part of the journey. The rest of the way, recognize the direction and work hard. How to go and how far you go depends on yourself.
A short ten days' company can't make up for my six years' company, but it's not too late for me to mend it. Fortunately, I can find and deal with the child's emotional changes in time, and also enlighten her to a certain extent, so as not to make the child's condition worse, but to get very effective self-regulation and control. In the days to come, no matter how busy I am, I will video with my child for an hour every week, talking about her study and sharing with her little things about my sister, her father and my daily life. In this way, she did not take any medicine prescribed by the doctor, and the child survived. I am happy that she can work hard for the postgraduate entrance examination this year, regardless of success or failure. I have carefully observed this time when I went home, and the child's psychology has been very healthy. It is normal to have fun with my sister every day, help me with housework and make my own plans for the future. Today, I talked to her again for these two patients in the Gulf. She told me confidently, mom, don't worry. If I can't get into graduate school, I'll go to be a North drift. Take your advice and get an English teacher qualification certificate. If I can't get along, I will go to my grandfather's school to teach English. If I can't get along, as you said, let's go home and farm ... the last few words of my child are self-knowledge. As long as you are mentally healthy, it doesn't matter how you go in the future, because I believe that the strong will win!