Children of different sexes have different parenting methods. Compared with girls, boys are more rebellious and naughty, which means that parents need to pay more attention to discipline them. Otherwise, boys are more harmful to society, which can be seen from the fact that many juvenile criminals are mostly men.
Li Meijin, a professor at Public Security University, has been devoted to the study of teenagers' psychology and crime for many years. On the issue of disciplining boys, Professor Li Meijin put forward his own views: to raise boys, parents should adhere to these four principles before they are 65,438+02 years old, and children should take responsibility in the future sunshine. # There are many ways to raise children #
With the improvement of people's living standards, there are more and more arranged education.
According to a survey conducted by a social survey center of a newspaper, 34.8% of the respondents indicated that parents' arranged behavior could last until their children went to college.
Have you noticed that the incidence of each of these "bad habits" exceeds 50%, which is enough to attract our attention.
Fox rule
In the world of foxes, when foxes grow up, they have to leave their parents to face the world alone, because then they can grow up faster and learn to live independently.
This seems cruel, and of course, it doesn't seem to apply to human society. However, the laws of nature are the same, natural selection, survival of the fittest, if you can't adapt to the law of survival of the fittest, then one day you will be eliminated by society.
As parents, how to make children more independent?
Children's ability will be gradually enhanced in the process of growth, and parents should learn to get out at the right time and let their children do what they want. Perhaps the child will inevitably hit a wall at first, but after stumbling all the way, the child will certainly gain a lot, at least become stronger and braver, and dare to face all the difficulties in society alone.
Parents are always worried that their children will be hurt, so they will hold up an umbrella behind their children to make them become flowers in the greenhouse and not be destroyed by any bad weather.
However, parents can't hold this umbrella all their lives, so it may be the greatest protection for children to put it away in time, so that children's various thinking abilities and senses can be developed and children can have a stronger psychology to face setbacks.
1, let children participate in housework
Children are part of the family, and parents can't always give them preferential treatment and privileges, so that they can accept everything with peace of mind. Instead, let children participate in housework as much as possible, assign them housework suitable for them according to their age, and let them finish it independently as much as possible.
In this process, children not only enhance their practical ability, but also know that they should assume their responsibilities for the family. As long as the child can finish the work, parents should try not to interfere, and even if the child needs to spend more time on it, try to encourage the child to finish the work.
2. Clever handling of children's mistakes
Children will inevitably make mistakes when they grow up. Many parents will lose their temper and yell at their children when they see their children make mistakes, which will only make them afraid to try and deprive them of practical opportunities and abilities.
If the child's mistake is not serious, it is only a small mistake, then parents can choose to let the child handle it himself and let the child find a way to deal with it and make up for his own mistakes.
However, if the child's mistake is serious, has touched the bottom line, or hurt others, then parents must intervene in time, give the child the necessary guidance, find out the key to solving the problem with the child, and let the child learn to be responsible for his own mistakes.
What is frustration education?
The so-called frustration education means that educators purposefully adopt certain educational methods and means to help and guide educators to correctly understand setbacks and consciously guard against the possible negative effects of setbacks.
Misunderstanding of frustration education
In the cognition of many parents, children's living conditions have been greatly improved, which makes them have few opportunities to suffer setbacks. Therefore, in order to make their children face setbacks better, many parents often artificially create setbacks for their children, and then let them learn how to deal with them.
The frustration created by these parents is often beyond the children's ability. Children may find it difficult to finish after a lot of efforts, so they will feel frustrated, doubt their abilities, and even form a sense of learned helplessness, thinking that they can't do anything well and can only associate with failure.
When Zuckerberg, the founder of FACEBOOK, gave birth to his little girl, Zuckerberg wrote a letter to her affectionately, telling her what kind of hopeful world was coming, hoping that she would enjoy every moment of growing up.
In the letter, there is such a passage:
He hopes that children can enjoy their childhood, get enough sleep and don't have to worry too much about the future.
He has no intention of depicting a world full of competition, so that children can get ready and start fighting as soon as possible.
Because he believes that he can change the world and give his children a better world.
Do your best to support children.
When children grow up, they will encounter all kinds of difficulties and setbacks. When they fail, they will be depressed and pessimistic. At this time, parents must stand by and give their children the greatest support.
If children don't want to talk and express their emotions when they are sad, then parents can hug them and give them an invisible power.
Parents should communicate with their children in encouraging language, and don't always deny and laugh at them, otherwise they will have a shadow in their hearts. Only by encouraging them more can children be willing to try and dare to try. Because no matter what age we are, we all want to be recognized and understood by others. If parents can put themselves in their children's shoes, they can naturally understand their feelings.
Create a harmonious family atmosphere
Only in a good family atmosphere can children grow up with the care of their parents, which will inevitably make their personality sunny and optimistic and more positive about life.
Encourage and praise children more.
If parents always criticize and deny their children, it will naturally make them self-doubt and self-deny. Only by seeing the advantages of children and giving them more praise language will children believe in themselves more and become brave and confident.
Give children a sense of security.
Children's need for security is innate, and this sense of security is given by parents. If parents always deny the sense of security that children need, then children will become timid and introverted, and only children with security can have a good character.
Create opportunities for children to communicate with each other.
Parents can't always keep their children at home and let them study, or try to take them out of the house and play with other children. In this way, children will know how to communicate with others, how to improve their interpersonal skills, and it is easier to cultivate a good character.