(B) the characteristics of family education
1, enlightenment. Our children's knowledge and understanding of the outside world, the formation of personality and character, all start from family education. Family education is different from social education and school education. Children mainly live at home before they go to school. Early family education is very important for a person's ideological formation, intellectual development and character formation. For example, children love to lose their temper. If he is well guided, he will become more peaceful and stable. If the guidance is not good, he will become grumpy and gradually form a grumpy character.
2. Long-term. Family education takes the longest time, far exceeding school education. Family education has been playing a role since the birth of children, primary school, junior high school, high school, university and work. The distance between a child and his family is widening in the process of adulthood and society, but the influence of family education still exists. In a sense, the role of family education is more profound than that of school education.
3. comprehensiveness. Family education involves a wide range of contents. Parents should take care of what the school wants to take care of, and parents should also take care of what the school doesn't care about. Children's food, clothing, housing, transportation, safety, ability, hobbies and aesthetics are inseparable from family education, so the coverage of family education is very wide. It is precisely because of these characteristics that family education has a great influence on a person, so family education is even more important.
Second, the basic types of family rearing patterns
Family rearing pattern refers to the educational behavior of parents' stable parenting concepts and habits for their children. It refers to a behavioral tendency shown by parents in their daily activities of raising children. It is a summary of the characteristics of parents' various parenting behaviors and has relative stability. Lin Lei, a Chinese researcher, took the mothers of pre-school children in Beijing as subjects and used the method of rapid clustering to classify five parenting styles: positive, severe, achievement pressure, doting and extreme behavior. Researchers Guan Ying and Liu Chunfen also found that parents' parenting styles are divided into democratic, tolerant and authoritarian. There are also two scholars, Fang Xiaoyi and JUNG WOO. In their research on junior high school students in Beijing, according to their parents' evaluation, they found four parenting styles from the aspects of emotional warmth and severe punishment: general, contradictory, laissez-faire and positive. These classifications are all put forward under the cultural background of China, and in the final analysis, they are similar to the classification of parenting styles put forward by the West. Baum Linde, an American psychologist, classifies parenting styles into democratic, autocratic, indulgent and neglected from two dimensions: parents' response/care and demand/control.
Democratic type: Parents in this family rearing style will give their children certain autonomy, meet their reasonable demands, treat their children's mistakes correctly, and respect each other and communicate on an equal footing among family members, which will both restrain and encourage their children. Children under this democratic upbringing have strong self-esteem, self-confidence, self-discipline, creativity, strong social skills, achievement motivation and other good social adaptability personality characteristics.
Authoritative: Authoritative parents require their children to obey themselves unconditionally. Ignore children's reasonable demands, can't tolerate children's mistakes, ask too much of children, do things badly, and often punish and reprimand children. This kind of upbringing is decided by parents, and parents and children are unequal. Children who grow up in this way will show more negative emotions and behaviors such as anxiety and withdrawal, but they will do well in school.
2. The purpose and significance of primary school composition evaluation What is composition? In short, that is to say, writing is writing with a purpose.
But now, such a simple thing has become a heart disease and a devil for students to learn Chinese. Students hate Chinese because they are afraid of writing.
Why is this happening? There are many reasons, but the most important ones are exam-oriented education and composition evaluation. First, the misunderstanding of composition evaluation.
Different people have different opinions on evaluating the quality of a composition, but it is undeniable that an excellent composition must meet some standards, such as fresh and smooth words, sincere and touching plot, rigorous logical structure, insightful views, beautiful language and clever rhetoric ... which have undoubtedly become the goal of students' composition efforts. Therefore, the teacher's evaluation of students' compositions is also based.
However, using this standard to evaluate a primary school student's composition is dwarfed. Because everyone ignores a problem: primary school students are children, a group of carefree children who only know how to eat, drink and be merry, and their compositions can't be compared with those of literati.
Using this standard to evaluate primary school students' compositions leads to misunderstanding of students' compositions. Misunderstanding 1. Beautiful words fly all over the sky.
I don't know why, many teachers advocate that the more words, the better. The criteria for evaluating composition are: using several idioms and using several rhetorical methods ... So, in order to cater to the teacher's taste and get high marks, students pile up as many beautiful words as possible in their own articles. For example, a fourth-grade pupil wrote in an article entitled "Mother's Love": "When I was 3 years old, my father died, so I walked into the kindergarten through my mother's tears ... I don't remember how many stormy nights ... In the faint moonlight, can I watch her kind face?" How do you feel after reading this passage? It seems that I saw a profound scholar, which is fake, too fake.
The teacher thinks such an article is a good composition, so the students keep copying it. Isn't this harmful to students? Myth 2: The longer the composition, the better.
Many teachers limit the number of words in students' compositions, and how many words must be written to be qualified. Therefore, every time students finish writing a paragraph, they go back and count how many words they have written and how many words are still missing.
If you have nothing to say, squeeze until you have enough words. Read this article again, it's nonsense and boastful, isn't it misleading? Misunderstanding 3, there must be a certain ideological connotation.
Some teachers require students to have a certain ideological realm in their compositions. A boy wrote an article about this: The students were in class when it suddenly rained, and the dense raindrops fell on the students' desks through the open window.
He closed the window at once. His ending is like this: "I jumped on the windowsill at once …" This ending is both simple and thought-provoking.
But the teacher felt bad because he didn't write his own thoughts at that time. The student is at a loss. "I didn't think of anything."
At the teacher's request, I began to make up: "Raindrops fell on me, and heroic images such as Lei Feng, Dong Cunrui and Zhang Side emerged in my mind ..." No wonder students scratch their heads as soon as they write their compositions, and they don't have such profound ideology! In this way, students feel inscrutable about the composition and have nothing to do, so they have to write a lot of cliches and big words, fabricate lies and express false feelings, regardless of the willy-nilly. A classmate with good composition results introduced her composition secrets to her classmates, saying, "First, examine the questions, find out the composition requirements, and then take out your composition selections. First choose an article that meets the requirements of this composition, change the beginning and end, and just copy it. "
What a good composition book. It is conceivable that how many students' compositions are plagiarized, how many are pieced together and how many are imaginary.
If this continues, what is the future of primary school students' composition? Why is this happening? Generally speaking, the reason lies in the misunderstanding of adults, teachers and exam-oriented education. Teachers have been examining students' compositions from the perspective of adults: how many good words are used and what rhetorical methods are used; Analyze the students' composition from an adult's point of view: what kind of structure form is adopted, what expression method is used, what is the central idea and why; Furthermore, we use adult thinking to coach and modify students' compositions: how should you write, which words should be used, and what structural form should be adopted ... Students' compositions have become the object of sculpture.
In this case, students lose their individuality, freedom, innocence, and the world where they can talk about their inner feelings, and become mechanical: they mechanically imitate adults and look at them in everything, so a group of "little adults" and "little old gentlemen" like the author of Motherly Love appeared; Become overwhelmed: I don't know what to write to please the teacher, and I don't know what kind of articles the teacher likes. Complain bitterly.
It can be seen that only relying on teachers' subjective feelings to evaluate primary school students' composition has seriously dampened students' enthusiasm for composition, and they have not gone out of these misunderstandings in composition evaluation, changed their concepts and analyzed the psychological characteristics of primary school students. Therefore, we must update our concepts and use childlike innocence to perceive the world in students' eyes.
Second, use childlike innocence to perceive. Children are children, children have their own world, children have their own language, and children have their own views on problems.
The world in children's eyes is invisible to adults and colorful. Therefore, although the evaluation of primary school students' compositions may vary from person to person, don't forget that we are faced with a group of children who have no worries or worries and can only bow their heads. To evaluate a pupil's composition, we should look at whether the article he wrote is "true" from the child's point of view.
The so-called "truth" means telling the truth, saying things and expressing the truth. Composition comes from life, and every little thing and feeling in life is a good composition material.
1, tell the truth, "a truth". A child has his own language, and he will not choose and avoid it from the perspective of adults.
Their joy, anger, sadness and joy will be written on paper without disguise: "I have a thorn in my hand and I am crying with pain." "I like potatoes best."
From these, you can obviously feel the innocence of children. Don't you think it's killing innocence if you force him to write how strong he is and change "potato" into "potato"? Therefore, despite the language in the text.
3. What are the advantages of children's writing? Writing needs to think and cultivate children's thinking ability.
Give you a composition topic, and you need to organize the materials according to the composition topic. This also exercises the children's organizational ability.
In fact, teaching children how to write a good composition from an early age is of great benefit to their future. Writing a composition requires thinking and thinking to cultivate children's thinking ability. Give you a composition topic, and you need to organize the materials according to the composition topic.
This also exercises the children's organizational ability. Writing a composition can exercise children's reading ability and analytical ability.
To sort out the collected data, you must read them. If you don't look at it, you won't know whether the material is suitable or not. It's a little late to write a composition, so I need to look for more information.
Therefore, children's reading ability is cultivated. This is also the advantage of writing for children.
Writing a composition can broaden children's thinking, let them open their minds, imagine freely, and then write it down. This will cultivate children's thinking and expand.
Cultivating children's language expression ability can better organize speech. There are many more. In short, writing a composition has many benefits for children, so parents must cultivate their children's interest in writing.
Give children a good future.
On April 1 day, a pair of young parents dragged their son across the road at a red light in Hankou, Wuhan. The child said noisily, "The teacher said you can't cross the road when the red light is on."
Mom said "it doesn't matter, hurry up", and dad repeatedly said "go, go". Two adults dragged their children across the street, and the children cried and made noise, which attracted passers-by to wait and see.
"Stop at the red light and go at the green light" is a well-known traffic rule for women and children. The children in the report can still obey. Why do parents care so little? Recently, the reporter visited several main roads in the city and found many similar phenomena.
Actions speak louder than words. Parents should set a good example for their children with practical actions, instead of taking tutoring as a joke. A naive child is like a blank sheet of paper. Parents should pay attention to their words and deeds in family education, and never leave a bad mark on their children's hearts, so that children will lose at the starting line if they lose to their parents.
If you have any ideas or different opinions on this topic, you can search for "Baotou Evening News Education Weekly" on Sina or Tencent Weibo, join the official Weibo of Baotou Evening News Education Weekly, and interact with the editor of this edition in Weibo. Are you qualified to be a child's first teacher? When a child is born, it is a blank sheet of paper.
Parents are the key factors that can't be ignored if you want to draw beautiful patterns on this piece of white paper. As a child's first teacher.
Parents' words and deeds will affect the shaping of children's character and have a decisive impact on their growth. However, few parents reflect on whether their behavior is improper when complaining about their children's behavior.
At present, many parents have some misunderstandings about their children's love and education. For example, family education puts children's achievements first, expects too much of children, attaches importance to intellectual education and ignores moral education, but ignores the cultivation of children's ability to seek knowledge, cooperate and survive; There are also some parents who love their children too much, let themselves go or make a fuss about the problems encountered in their children's growth, which leads to their spoiled and selfish personality, disrespect for the elderly, love to contradict their elders, and do not know how to share ... The quality of parents is the key reason for these misunderstandings in family education. Lenin's wife, Krupskaya, said: "Family education is first and foremost the self-education of parents."
It can be seen that the core of family education is the improvement of parents' own quality. The continuity of family education cannot be ignored. In addition, while constantly improving their own quality, parents need to realize that the most important feature of family education is continuity.
After the child is born, he lives at home for almost 2/3 of the time and is educated by his parents all day. This kind of education is carried out intentionally or unintentionally, planned and unplanned, consciously or unconsciously. No matter how and when education is carried out, it is parents who influence their children with their words and deeds anytime and anywhere.
This kind of education is constantly influencing and demonstrating children's living habits, moral conduct and manners. Its subtle function is quite great. As a person lives, it can be said that it is never too old to learn, so some educators call parents lifelong teachers. Use "example" to light the green light of family education. In reality, parents always teach their children to do this, not that.
But in practice, the actual behavior of adults is often contrary to the lip service of educating children. For example, "parents force their children to run red lights" is a typical example. I firmly believe that this parent will teach his children not to run red lights at home.
Adults have different words and deeds, not only running red lights, but also many aspects, such as not letting children play games and being more obsessed with themselves than children; For example, let children read more, but children don't like reading; For example, make children kind, but they are evil, and so on. This phenomenon can be called the red light phenomenon of family education and should be stopped quickly.
As the saying goes, children have the shadow of their parents, from which it is not difficult to see the importance of parents' education for their children. This kind of education is not oral education, but practical education. Teaching by example is more important than teaching by example and plays a decisive role in family education. To put it bluntly, parents' unconscious behavior is the most direct imitation benchmark for children.
Therefore, as parents, as the first responsible person of family education, we must be cautious and strict with ourselves. Only in this way can we set a good example for children and guide them to grow up in a civilized, healthy and happy way. On the contrary, it can only make children ugly, deformed and painful.
The red light phenomenon in family education is a phenomenon that we often ignore and must arouse our vigilance. As parents, we should always remind ourselves to give the green light in family education so that children can grow up green, smoothly and healthily. Never create a red light for family education, and cultivate the deformed quality of children running red lights from an early age.
Don't let the quality of parents affect the growth of children. My friend's daughter is over 6 years old this year. During the conversation, he said that although he didn't like reading, he forced himself to keep reading every day. In order to let his young daughter see his father reading, her daughter would also like reading and studying.
While lamenting that it is not easy to be a parent, the author agrees with my friends' understanding in this respect. This move can really set a good example for young children. However, many parents do not understand this.
Mom Doudou has been very upset recently. Doudou is only 5 years old, but he is often constipated. Ask Doudou's diet, only to know that Doudou only likes to eat meat, not how to eat vegetables and fruits.
Further understanding found that Doudou is picky about food for a reason, and Doudou's parents also have the same eating habits. Such scenes abound in life.
Can eating habits, words and deeds be inherited? Of course not, but these can be imitated and learned. Father gives his son fist education, and his son often fights with children in kindergarten; The daughter was asked to behave in a dignified and polite manner, but the mother spoke ill of her neighbors.
5. A short composition about the influence of parents on their children. Writing an article about parents caring for their children warms everyone's hearts, which is the spring breeze; Caring is the torch that illuminates everyone's journey; Caring is a harbor that comforts everyone who comes back from a long voyage. In life, we have all been cared for by others and cared for others selflessly. Caring for others can start with small things, such as helping a classmate with his homework, a good teacher's advice or a few words of encouragement, which can often bring unremitting motivation to students. For example, helping a blind man cross the street and talking to the old man ... these are all manifestations of caring for others. Then you all flatter me. Suhomlinski said, "If every child's joy and distress are beating your heart, causing you to think, care and worry, then you should bravely choose lofty teaching as your career, and you can find creative happiness in it." Because there is love, there will be the joy of creation. Because of the joy of creation, teachers are more full of love for education and students. Parents gave us love, and their love is great! We should also learn to care for ourselves, others and ourselves! Once, I went shopping with my parents. My mom asked me and my dad to wait for her below. She went to the women's world to buy clothes. My father and I sat down and waited. I saw a little girl. She is beautiful, wearing an old school uniform, but she has no arms. She writes with her feet to beg. There is ink and paper in front of her, and there is a small red bucket with money. With a brush between her toes, she began to touch the ink. I think she is so pitiful! I walked over without hesitation, put five dollars in the little red bucket, and then all the people passing by gave their love. What makes people angry is that there are always some parents who hold their children in their arms and leave at a glance without any love, which has brought bad influence to those children since childhood and is not conducive to cultivating love. The little girl has no healthy body, no happy family and no happy study at school. How much she needs our love and warmth. Yes! As the song goes: As long as everyone gives a little love, the world will become a beautiful world. Our home will be warmer and better. I sincerely appeal to friends all over the world to care for others and themselves! Let yourself and the people around you be full of love! Make people full of love! Fill the world with love.
6. Can you write some compositions about the influence of parents on children in all aspects and send them to me? A parent of Liyuan Primary School in Shenzhen got some initial experience. Good afternoon, parents. I am a stay-at-home mom. I quit my job as a hospital nurse since I had a daughter.
My daughter's name is XXX and she will be eleven next month. She is less than six years old and in the first grade. After finishing the second grade and passing the exam, she went directly to the fourth grade. Finally, she graduated from Liyuan with excellent results and was admitted to Shenzhen Foreign Languages School. I also take this opportunity to thank Mr. Xu, Mr. Zhou, Mr. Wei and Mr. Ma for their teaching and concern for XXX in the past few years.
Looking back on the relationship with my daughter's teachers and friends for so many years, it is really mixed. I deeply sigh that it is really not easy to be a competent parent. What I do every day is trivial and specific, from punctual transportation, three meals a day, to in-class and out-of-class study, counseling and physical exercise, to psychological counseling, making friends, reading good books, traveling and studying, and so on.
Let's talk about learning first. The husband will help his daughter make a detailed study plan first, which is the most important thing. This will give children a clear goal, and the plan will be divided into long-term and short-term. For example, in the sixth grade, they will learn ten Olympic math books, make six encyclopedias, take two Chinese classes, and each person will have ten English listening and reading books, specifically every minute every day. This is the daily plan of last semester: school was finished at 4:20, and I walked home for 40 minutes at a brisk pace, at 5: 00. 5: 40-6: 10 dinner, 6: 10-6: 30 encyclopedia knowledge, 6: 30-6: 40 table tennis, 6: 45-8: 00 school homework, 8: 00-8: 30 shower to eat fruit.
The plan must be detailed, specific and reasonable. Once a plan is made, parents must supervise their children to stick to it. Thirdly, it is not easy for parents to carefully select all kinds of books, exercises and test papers suitable for children to read.
We will ask excellent students and parents. I have a classmate's daughter named Weng Han, who scored 778 points in the senior high school entrance examination this year. In junior high school for three years, she was in one or two classes in senior high school. I will often call them to ask what they study and what books they read at each stage. When she graduated from primary school, I will go to their home and bring her used books and textbooks. After screening, I will leave them to my children. Now Weng Han is in high school. At ordinary times, the school teacher will give some good recommendations, such as xu teacher's request for advanced classes and Huanggang secret papers, and Teacher Zhou's request for a general review of primary school English. In fact, parents know their children best.
My husband often goes to major bookstores after work, buys books of all levels with his heart, and studies them carefully after returning home. It is too difficult and too easy to be eliminated. For example, when I found that Mensa was particularly good at intellectual training and my daughter couldn't put it down, I immediately went to the bookstore to buy it, but all the books in major bookstores were incomplete. I visited four or five stores and finally bought a set of seven books.
Just after the summer vacation, my husband found "128 Middle School Story" in the bookstore, and he bought a copy. After reading it, I found that the content was particularly good, especially suitable for my daughter to read now, so I went to many bookstores every day to buy a set of eight books for my daughter to read, and I often discussed the problems in the book with my daughter. In the sixth grade, in addition to carefully finishing the homework assigned by the school and reading newspapers, my daughter also completed 13 olympiad and 40 sets of senior high school entrance examination papers, 16 English reading, 14 listening, 2 grammar exercises and 38 sets of senior high school entrance examination papers, 6 Chinese encyclopedias and 1 new question bank.
In daily study, I think the most important thing is to have ways to make children learn consciously, efficiently and happily. Let me talk about how my daughter learns English.
Turn on the repeater as soon as you get up every morning, so that English can fill every corner of the living room. At this time, my daughter can hear English intentionally or unintentionally, whether she is eating or in the bathroom. These golden twenty minutes have cultivated my daughter's good hearing. Daughter laughs. This is an overall arrangement in mathematics. It took her twenty minutes to finish what she had to do for forty minutes, and the effect was surprisingly good. I have persisted for five years and will continue to persist. What tapes to play every day should be prepared first, followed by textbooks, new concepts, listening and reading.
There may be many children learning new concepts here. My daughter finished learning 1 and 2 volumes in the fifth grade. This learning process is very hard. Before each class, my daughter and I will listen to the tape word for word two or three times. I will spell the words I don't know several times, then look at the grammar, practice after class, circle the words I don't understand, and listen carefully in class. This process takes three hours. I have to recite the text after class. As a result, my daughter recited the best English in the class. All the textbooks she has studied, such as school textbooks, Cambridge Children's English 1, 2, 3, New Concept 1, 2, are skillfully recited and dictated in every class. Her daughter gets the most points in word dictation 100 every week, and dictation is about 80 per semester. Her daughter's average score in the class is 97.
When it comes to learning Olympic Mathematics, my daughter has never attended an off-campus training class. 1-5 grade, she is very interested in doing her own problems. If she doesn't understand, she will ask us or the teacher. We bought the Handbook of Basic Mathematics for Primary Schools and went through the knowledge points of primary schools. In this way, in the sixth grade, for the sake of competition and further education, my daughter worked hard for a year and did 30 questions every day, basically by herself. Because I have to do a lot of problems every day, I sometimes get upset. At this time, I will compete with my daughter to do the questions and calculate the results. My daughter's indomitable spirit has come up and her enthusiasm for learning is high.
The victory or defeat of this game is in my hands. When my daughter is proud, I will let her down. When my daughter is depressed, I will skillfully let her win. This kind of learning can often get good results. Finally, when it comes to learning Chinese, xu teacher's way of teaching composition is very special, and children like it very much. Xu teacher once said confidently, "I can use half a year to make children who don't like writing like writing and children who can't write can write.