When talking to children, American parents never stand on it, but communicate with their children equally. When children refuse to eat, American parents never force them, but gently say, "Look, radish cakes are waiting for you. If you don't eat it, it will be unhappy. " When a child does something wrong, parents rarely blame the child, but say, "I don't think you did it on purpose. It won't happen next time." If the child wants to change clothes, they also say in a consultative tone that the child has the right to choose. When taking children out to play, American parents will not answer "He won't eat" and "He won't" for their children in advance, as most parents in China do, but the children will make the decision. Of course, this does not mean that all children's needs have been met. Parents usually explain and explain what the host does not provide and what the child wants. For example, when a child wants the precious plaything of the host family, parents will tell the child that everyone has something he likes, and we can't ignore the feelings of others because of our own needs, so that the child can understand the truth of interacting with others.
Many parents in China like to teach their children before others, and often accuse and reprimand their children for being disappointing, stupid and worthless. In the United States, parents think it is a crime, because accusing children in public greatly hurts their self-esteem.
Britain: Give children a chance to fail.
When children grow up, it is inevitable that they will fail. If the child is young, China's parents will laugh it off, try to help him get rid of the problem, or simply let the child give up.
British parents don't think so. Mike's son Charlie is 10 years old this year. The little boy can not only take care of his daily life, repair the water pipes and appliances at home, but also repair the car. In China, this knowledge may not be understood by young men in their twenties.
The first time Charlie did something was when he was 2 years old. He watched Mike do the dishes curiously. So Mike carried Charlie to the pool. Charlie jumped into the pool at once and began to work. This is washing dishes, and it is also equivalent to taking a bath. The clothes and trousers are all wet, and the bowl is not cleaned, but one of them is broken.
Mike didn't stop him He stood by and watched Charlie's every move. At first, Charlie was still laughing. Slowly, he felt that it was not funny at all. He was covered with oil and cold water stuck to him ... He asked Mike for help, and Mike stuck his head out of the window ... Finally, he couldn't help crying.
Only then did Mike take him out, put on clean clothes and put them by the sink. Then, under Charlie's gaze, he washed the dishes one by one. Then, put Charlie's toy bowl and chopsticks in the pool.
Charlie washed the toy bowls and chopsticks this time, and his clothes were only half wet. The third time, only the sleeves were a little wet. Mike taught him how to wash dishes, and Charlie became better and better.
Mike's idea is simple: "Give children a chance to fail, face failures again and again, correct their mistakes until they succeed. This is not only to teach children to learn and master their own abilities, but also to teach them an attitude towards life.
Australia: Teaching children the ability to survive
Children from wealthy families in Australia are generally sent by their parents to learn sailing since childhood. The coach often stops the boat in the shallows, and the bottom of the boat will inevitably be covered with sand. The job of a cat's head is to clean it with a rag and water. 1 1 years old, he squatted on a boat and worked in the sun for six hours every day for a whole summer vacation, and his mother would not stop him because of his distress. Because in her mind, the cat head has the right and the ability to arrange his own time.
Yusheng always dozes off in class and asks him why. He proudly said: "I deliver newspapers in the community from 5 am to 7 am every Thursday, and I can earn 14 yuan once!" The other boys in the class are envious.
Considering the mentality of parents in China, we will never allow this to happen: let the children go to the shallows to clean the boats. What if there is an accident? What should I do if I can't learn my lessons well in order to earn 14 yuan? However, Australian parents don't think so. They think it is most important to cultivate children's ability, not how much specific knowledge they have learned.
Australian children are particularly patient. They have been taught since childhood that if they feel unwell, they can tell their parents to see a doctor, but they can't complain and moan endlessly. Complaining is futile. In winter, girls wear skirts and uniforms, while boys wear shorts and suits. Even on Sundays, parents don't dress their children in thick clothes. They are still running around the park lawn in shorts. Australian parents want their children to be bold, capable and creative when they grow up, and at the same time, they should have a strong body that is not afraid of cold, hunger and fatigue.
Israel: Let the children keep asking questions.
It is said that Jews are successful in business. Is there any way to educate children? I unconsciously observed Leah and Lamill. Leah is Israeli. Because her husband works in America, she also lives in America with her son Lamill.
That day, Lamill came home from the kindergarten bus. Leah asked Lamill, "Did you ask questions today?" Lamill nodded. "So, what did you ask?" Leah continued to ask. Lamill began to repeat the question he asked during the day: Why are there red and green leaves? Why do some ants have wings? Why can't milk be exchanged for your cookies ... I simply counted, and this little guy asked more than a dozen questions a day. Leah nodded with satisfaction.
Facts have proved that almost every Jew is asked questions by his elders at a very young age. When Leah was a child, her father asked her to ask ten questions every day. If no one answers her, find out for yourself.
"It's nothing," said Leah. "Almost every child in a Jewish family grew up asking questions."
I suddenly discovered the secret I had been looking for. Jews advocate innovation, think that learning should be based on thinking, dare to doubt, and are not ashamed to ask questions. Naturally, they accumulated more and more knowledge.
After reading the above article, I felt a lot of emotion in my heart. Each case was written for China's parents.
Americans pay attention to children's self-esteem, but we believe that children should be disciplined by their parents when they are young. Self-esteem is a matter for adults, so it is as easy and normal for us to reprimand our children as eating, but we don't know how many children's beautiful hearts and wishes have been damaged.
The British allow children to fail, but when we see them fail, we will fly into a rage, call them stupid, worthless and worthless, and degrade them to nothing, which makes them very depressed. And when we see depressed children, they will be complacent and think that their education has been successful, and the children will admit their mistakes and obey. But this is precisely the biggest failure, and the consequences are unimaginable.
The Australian way of education is even more unacceptable to us. If you don't take the college entrance examination, you will lose the opportunity to compete with others on an equal footing. Everything can be delayed, but learning can't be delayed. The baton of the college entrance examination makes parents tired and children tired. Many children admitted to college lack the ability to survive, can't find a job, and become a burden to their families. Some of them don't adapt to society, are autistic, depressed and even commit suicide. Is there more than one thing that the son of heaven in the ivory tower jumped to his death? Can't it arouse our reflection?
Israel pays attention to the development of children's thinking, so that children can learn to ask questions, that is, learn to explore, think and solve problems. We always let children memorize, calculate and train repeatedly, but forget the most important point: let children learn to think. This is the key to children's growth and national development. A nation that is good at thinking must be a powerful nation.
Ways and means for foreigners to educate their children
● The child fell, let him get up by himself, and let him feel that the road to growth will not be smooth sailing.
● Let children pay attention to two minutes when they see the national flag of their country.
● Taking children to the zoo is mainly to increase knowledge.
● Take children to parks and forests to make them like green and love life.
● Let children know that doing things for others seriously should become a good habit in everyone's life.
● Let children become the most enthusiastic and active people.
● Even if your financial situation is good, encourage your children to work with their own hands to make money, and let them pay part of their study expenses or insurance premiums.
● Encourage children to find a part-time job and do something they can during the holidays after 16 years old.
● Educate children to respect the elderly, soldiers, police, firefighters, sanitation workers, teachers and doctors.
● Let children learn music and learn to understand Beethoven, Chopin, Mozart and other good works that they can be proud of.
● Encourage children to speak, sing, dance and recite on stage.
Foreign methods of educating children
No matter how rich Australians are, they must "poor" their children. Americans cultivate children's independence from an early age. The British cultivate children's good qualities through "table education". Every parent is "ambitious", and "foreigners" are no exception.
Both at home and abroad, parents want their children to become useful people to society, but success requires various conditions, such as creativity and personality, tempering in adversity and having high civilized quality. And it's not just feeding children, reading more books and doting on them. There are various ways to educate children in the world. Let's have a look. Maybe you can get some inspiration. ...
America: Shaping Independence in Adversity
The independent training of children is the most prominent in the United States. American children have lived alone in a room since they were two or three years old. If children are afraid, adults will buy a special lamp and put it in the bedroom to keep it on all night to drive away the darkness. Before going to bed, the father or mother goes to the child's room to say good night and then leaves, and the child falls asleep with toys such as dolls. Children with a little self-care ability should decorate their own rooms. In the United States, children above/kloc-0 can basically eat by themselves. Parents "tie" their children to chairs, put food on small tables and let them eat with small knives and forks. In kindergarten, children who are a few months old will drink milk alone, and children over 2 years old will eat with knives and forks.
Compared with Americans, China's parents love their children too much and take care of every little thing, which seems to be a good thing, but actually hurts their children. According to a survey, when children in China grow up, their ability to do things independently in society is worse than that of foreign children. Self-care ability is 5-6 years later than foreign children.
Austria: "Imaginative Kindergarten"/P-11463 49882708.html has a unique kindergarten in Vienna, the Austrian capital of Europe. As the name implies, it is characterized by cultivating children's rich imagination. Walking into one of the classrooms of "Imagination Kindergarten" is like walking into a fairy tale world. Under the guidance of the teacher, the children spread their imagination wings and dressed themselves as beautiful Snow White or poor ugly duckling. In the classroom named "Space World", children travel in the vast universe in a simulated spaceship and imagine life on planets other than the earth to communicate. In the workshop, children use special small planers and saws to cut small pieces of wood with different shapes, and then color them to make a set of building blocks. In the sewing room, children learn to sew new clothes designed by themselves for teddy bears or dolls. ...
When children play, it is the best time to spontaneously generate imagination and creativity. Through these "plays", children's observation ability, memory ability, reasoning ability, language ability and so on can also be developed.
UK: Desktop Education
British families have a tradition of "taking the dining table as the classroom": from the first day when children go to the dining table, families begin to give them tangible or intangible "dining education". Generally, when I was two years old, I began to learn dining etiquette systematically. The British put an end to children's picky eaters. If children only eat one dish and ignore other dishes, parents often put them away. They believe that accommodating children at the dinner table will not only affect their comprehensive and adequate nutritional intake, but also make them develop a self-willed, selfish, uncontrollable and annoying character.
The purpose of "table education" in Britain is to help children develop good dining habits and learn good dining etiquette, so that they have various commendable qualities or personalities. Through children's mastery of self-help skills, on the one hand, it can reduce the burden on parents, on the other hand, it can enhance children's independence.