The family and social education that parents and elders received as children was much rougher than it is now, but most of them had no psychological problems. Why? Do they really have no psychological problems?

But how can there be no psychological problems? They know, but they don't admit it. They hold the idea that I won't get sick without taking the exam.

There are also some elders who don't have this idea at all, don't realize it, and force themselves to rationalize their pathological behavior, or just refuse to admit it and don't want to face the reality of illness. Don't say that mental illness is a physical illness. They don't want to go to the hospital, they are thinking about it, and they are holding back. If you want to tell them the symptoms of mental illness, they will only say melodramatic.

Everyone may have mental illness, and your elders and fathers will not be absent. Some of them are likely to suffer from mental illness, but they have not been treated by specialized institutions and professionals. Their mental illness and mental illness have always been borne by the weak in the family, so it seems that they are not sick.

Because the mental health of the older generation will generally be externalized as torturing others.

The usual treatment of mental illness, one is telling. Do any of your elders complain to everyone and all the time? The family complained again, complaining every day, complaining again and again, and it was his children who listened the most. At this time, the children are his psychotherapists.

Also, people are extremely harsh and mean. In his mouth, everyone else is rubbish and has no advantage. He focuses on the shortcomings of others, and only himself is the best. I think I am the most bitter in the world, and no one is more bitter than him. Everyone else is melodramatic, scolding others every day, saying that others can't do this and that, and they can do it themselves. We know that attacking others is self-protection and treatment.

The third is to control other people's lives and arrange other people's lives to interfere with children, finances, future, marriage and so on. Not accepting it is unfilial and crying, depriving children of their autonomy and resistance? Let children replicate their own trauma. Children inherit this kind of trauma through projective identification with their elders, and then pass it on to their small families and their children. Unconsciously, the elders have been cured to a certain extent.

A good family atmosphere is very important to avoid family trauma. Parents should participate in their children's activities, respect their choices and let them express their inner thoughts. Reduce your desire for control, be more tolerant and less picky. Emotional stability, giving children a warm family atmosphere.

I hope that the novice parents in the future will have self-knowledge and prevent this kind of family trauma from being passed down from generation to generation.