There are two factors that affect children's personality development, one is genetic factor, and the other is acquired environmental factor. Genetic factors lay the foundation for the formation of children's personality, but they cannot determine the final development of children's personality. Among the acquired environmental factors, family environment has a wide and far-reaching influence on the development of children's personality.
The importance of family environment to children's development is self-evident. It is the first environment since the child was born, the cradle of the child's growth, and the parents are the first enlightenment teachers of the child. After entering the new century, the healthy development of children has become a topic of general concern in society. It is of great practical necessity to study the influence of family environment on children's personality.
Second, the current situation of the family environment
For various reasons, many parents don't realize the importance of family environment to their children's personality, which has an indelible negative impact on their children's life.
1. autocracy. Some parents take the form of arranging children instead. Although young children are not strong in practical ability, they still have some autonomy. They are eager to have their own small world and hope that their parents will give them some freedom. However, due to their parents' single-handedness, they can only obey unconditionally. As for the right or wrong standard of behavior, it is decided by parents' dictatorship. Children can't ask why, they can only obey unconditionally. Children who come out of this family environment have poor independence and autonomy, and are more likely to form dependent, naive and neurotic personalities.
2. spoil. Due to the implementation of China's family planning policy, most families now have only one child, whether it is a boy or a girl, and parents regard it as a treasure. They are full of love and expectation for their children, lack proper control and requirements, take an attitude of accepting or turning a blind eye to their children's violations, and lose their proper limit and rationality in love. Children who grow up under the doting of their parents can easily form selfish, willful, overbearing and unreasonable characters, and can't get along well with other peers.
3. severe type. Some parents overestimate their children's abilities. They bet all their dreams that they failed to realize when they were young on their children, and only allow them to develop along their own trajectory. As we all know, children have their own growth rules, and blindly encouraging them will only be counterproductive. Strict parents set countless boxes for their children, forbidding them to do this and that. Children who grow up in this family environment can't feel the warmth of the family and the care of their parents, so children who come out of this family environment are prone to form impulsive, indifferent and withdrawn personality defects.
Third, optimize the family environment and promote the healthy growth of children.
1. Create a good material living space. Nowadays, although many parents decorate their children's living space beautifully and cleanly, they are afraid that their children will be messed up, dirty and damaged, so they never allow their children to move this and that, which will lead to the loss of the educational value of the material living space. Children are naturally curious and active. In the process of seeing, touching and manipulating objects, they can get a clearer and more specific perceptual knowledge of things. As long as children know that things should be put back after playing, parents should give full play to the educational role of the material environment, provide children with opportunities to know things, and even explore the utility of material space with children.
2. Establish a scientific educational concept. Children are the crystallization of parents' love. They are a seedling and need to be watered by their parents. First of all, parents should establish correct evaluation criteria. Nowadays, "obedience" is no longer the only criterion for evaluating children. With the increasingly fierce market competition, what society needs first is talents with independent consciousness and the ability to face the challenges of the times. Therefore, parents can no longer interfere in their children's personal lives without authorization, and don't make decisions for their children. Instead, let their children think independently and analyze the pros and cons. Secondly, parents should give their children enough practical exercise, let them think with their brains and do it with their hands, and improve their ability to adapt to social life.
3. Actively build a harmonious parent-child relationship. First of all, parents should believe that children are unique treasures in the world and a gift from God. Regardless of the child's life performance and academic performance, parents should respect the child's growth trajectory and don't make irresponsible remarks about the child's behavior deviation. Secondly, parents should seize the opportunity to praise their children. To promote the healthy growth of children, parents should strive to find other bright spots of children, so that children can affirm their self-worth and realize self-acceptance. It is necessary to tap the potential of children and promote their all-round development. Third, parents should spend more time growing up with their children. No matter the pressure of life and work is increasing day by day, parents should spend more time with their children, spend more time with their children and interact with them, so that children can take fewer detours and experience more on the road of life growth and thrive with a more calm mind.
4. Advocate democratic family upbringing. Parents who adopt democratic upbringing generally appear in front of their children as equals. They are the children's most trusted big friends and the most trusted elders. Such parents regard their children as an independent individual, not an accessory to their own lives. They are willing to listen to their children's opinions and inner thoughts patiently and encourage them to speak their minds bravely. When children make decisions, they should be guided from the side, not interfered, so as to cultivate their independence and autonomy. Practice has proved that the democratic parenting style is an ideal parenting style, which is worth popularizing in many families.
Four. conclusion
Parents and children are complete and can be called a home. We must admit that all the good and kind qualities of children are slowly sprouting in the family. Whether the "soil" at home is fertile or barren depends entirely on the irrigation and cultivation of parents. In order to cultivate children's good character, parents must create a good and harmonious family environment, consciously abandon the autocratic, doting and strict style, implement democratic parenting methods, handle the relationship between husband and wife and parent-child relationship, and promote the healthy growth of children.