The purpose of parents' education for their children
Parents' education is indispensable for children to learn well. Many of our parents also attach great importance to their children's education, but they just can't cultivate good academic performance. I think this is because they don't know how to educate their children. So we invited educational experts from Xueda University to explain the purpose of parent education to us.
? It is better to teach people to fish than to teach them to fish. It is better to teach children how to acquire material skills than to give them material things; Educate children to do things and be human, and cultivate children's hard-working heart; Let them know that a pay a harvest; Let them understand the value of life, that is, they can do more for others.
This is easy to help children improve their interpersonal relationships correctly and have a foothold in the crowd; Help children learn to start a business and earn a steady stream of wealth for themselves; With the correct guidance of parents, when they have power, because they have good ideas as the foundation, he will not become a notorious corrupt official; If you have money, you won't lose. As Comrade Chen Yi said? Children and grandchildren are not like me, what to do with money; If my children and grandchildren are like me, then why do they keep the money? .
Family is a child's first school, and parents are a child's first teacher. As a social cell, the family can educate your children in every little thing, every move, every look and every word. How do you work, how do you rest, how do you talk to friends, how do you talk to people who disagree? What are you like when you are healthy, sick, sad and happy? All these children will notice that they will imitate you in everything.
Everyone has the heart to love his son. Especially now that only children are? Sweetheart, baby, a pimple? If you are afraid of falling on your head, if you are afraid of melting in your mouth, the child can't stand any injustice. If parents blindly condone and cover up their children's shortcomings regardless of right and wrong, or even help them to abuse them, over time, children will become extremely selfish, indifferent, vicious, irresponsible and even turn against their parents? Because in their young hearts, the seeds of hatred are sown, not the seeds of friendship. Shouldn't parents reflect on their education? The consequences of such education for children, families and society are unimaginable.
We must understand the purpose of parents' education for children, so as to formulate good methods of education for children, so as to educate children with goals, so that children's education can achieve obvious results and have a great impact on children's study and life.
Taboos for parents to educate their children
Beating, scolding and doting are not the way to educate children.
Being too strict will do harm to children's young minds, especially the education of beating and cursing is not a good way to discipline children, because there will only be two consequences: either children will be more rebellious or children will have fear. Overindulgence will make children develop some bad habits and lose their independence. These are not the correct ideas for educating children.
In the process of educating children, mothers should pay attention to the way of loving children and grasp a degree. In a moderate range, the strictness is strict, and the release is free, so you can advance and retreat freely. Extreme strictness or indulgence is not good for children's growth.
Treat children equally.
A child is also an independent individual with his own thoughts and self-esteem. In front of children, mothers should talk and get along like friends, and don't give children a sense of distance, so that children are willing to express their ideas, and mothers and children can understand each other through mutual communication, and so can children? Be obedient? .
Xiao Yuan is a naughty little girl who always throws toys everywhere. Mom usually walks up to her impatiently and says, put away your toys quickly. I won't buy it for you in the future. ? Xiao Yuan played with her as if she didn't hear.
One day, my mother read in a book that she wanted to have an equal dialogue with her children. She tried to squat down, looked Xiao Yuan in the eye and said, "Baby, can you put away your toys?" ? It's not good to have guests in the future and let people see so much mess. ? Xiao Yuan looked at her mother carefully and began to pack up.
Treat your child equally, treat him as a normal thinking and cooperative person, talk to him like a friend, and he will understand you and cooperate with you very much.
Teaching students in accordance with their aptitude.
There are no two identical leaves in the world. Similarly, there are no identical children in the world. Every child has his own characteristics. Mothers should cultivate their children according to their own characteristics. They should not look at other children and ask their children to do the same.
When Yi Yi was five years old, her mother saw that other children began to learn a specialty, some studied music, some studied art, some studied piano, and so on. She thinks that arts and crafts should study fine arts, so that she can use it for any design in the future, so she plans to sign up for an art class for him.
Mother told Yiyi this idea, and Yiyi firmly opposed it, saying that she didn't like painting. Mother asked him what he liked, and he said he liked playing the harmonica. Mother thought, since the child likes it, let him learn it, so she let Yiyi take part in the harmonica training class.
Art has made great progress in the harmonica class. Because I like it, I practice playing the harmonica whenever I have time at home. Soon, her mother can hear wonderful music.
We should teach students in accordance with their aptitude. Confucius, a great educator, realized this idea two thousand years ago and proved its correctness. Confucius teaches students in accordance with their aptitude, which can be described as endless changes according to the different characteristics of students' psychology and thinking. Future generations are amazed? Master teaches students in accordance with their aptitude? . This still plays an important guiding role in today's education.
Improve children's abilities in an all-round way.
Children are in the period of laying the foundation. We should fully develop and improve children's various abilities, and we should not just pay attention to one point and ignore others, so that children can become one? A cripple? This is not conducive to the long-term development of children.
Ou Yali's language expression ability is very good, so her composition is well written and her Chinese performance is excellent, but her math performance is not ideal. Mother realizes this problem because the child's logical thinking has not been exercised, so she often gives her some questions to think about in order to strengthen exercise. Through constant practice, Yali's logical thinking has been well exercised. Math scores are gradually improving.
Children's ability development is often unbalanced, but in order for children to better adapt to the requirements of society in the future, mothers should correctly treat their weak aspects, strengthen counseling and training in time, and let their children develop in a balanced way.
You can't pay too much attention to scores.
Mothers can't just value their children's grades. If they think that the purpose of study is to get high marks, it is easy to cause it? High scores and low energy? Phenomenon. Mothers should realize that grades can't determine everything, and children's development should be all-round. Test scores are only the embodiment of children's learning effect in one stage, and the improvement of children's ability and quality is the ultimate goal of learning.
The idea of parents educating their children
First, the most common mistakes in family education
First, most of our parents have no special training. No matter when we were young or when we grew up, we fell in love and got married. No matter at school or in society, few people told us how to be parents. Even if someone says it, it's just an elder. They might say? Extend a dutiful son? 、? Are these concepts circulating in life right? This requires us to reflect. Parents' different languages, behaviors and education will leave different marks on their children, and parents without special training will inevitably make mistakes.
Secondly, parents' psychology of expecting their children to succeed and their daughters to succeed easily leads to deviation in family education. There is a natural emotional connection between parents and children, especially the integration of mother and child, which will naturally produce expectations. Inevitably, it is unrealistic to turn to children to accomplish what they have not achieved and failed to achieve. Parents' excessive care and care deprived children of room to grow up. How can many of them grow up without thinking about anything? Too many restrictions and interference to the other extreme will also hinder the release of children's potential. We often treat our children condescendingly. Parents? Pretend: you were born to me. I asked you to listen, but you didn't listen. Find a beat! ? How can this make children grow up healthily?
Third, many parents neglect their educational responsibilities. Because the focus of social attention is school education, parents care more about schools, so they are ignored as the real education foundation and the key to the fate of children. The education received in childhood affects a person's life. Children's initial understanding of the world originated from their parents, and the influence of family education is unforgettable. Ignorance of educational responsibility and bias of educational ideas naturally lead to mistakes in family education.
Second, without the growth of parents, there will be no growth of children.
It is said that parents are role models for children. Usually, the shadow of a warm and harmonious family can always be found behind the growth of excellent children into outstanding talents; Similarly, when a person forms an imperfect personality, factors full of conflicts and contradictions can also be found in the family. Parents always like to say:? Teacher, you can have all the children, please! ? What is the subtext? With me? It doesn't matter. In fact, this is definitely not the case. A good family is often accompanied by the common growth of parents and children; Bad families often have a negative impact on children. If parents don't make progress, how can they expect their children to become Jackie Chan and Phoenix?
In a learning family, parents and children grow up together and even influence each other. They often have some successful influence ways, such as parent-child reading, parent-child communication, telling growth stories and so on. The growth of parents, like the growth of children, is an endless process. The influence of parents' continuous progress and study is intangible and profound.
Third, morality is more important than learning, and realm is greater than method.
1. The most important task of family education is to build the Great Wall of Personality. The person you meet in life is often a handsome man who covers up all ugliness. Be a good boy if you get high marks and good grades. In fact, among the factors that affect lifelong development, scores are not the most important. It is morality, personality, happiness, popularity and respect, not knowledge. Little by little, it will lay a solid foundation for the sound development of personality. We have noticed that many parents care too much about their studies. As long as you get good grades, you promise everything, fulfill all your wishes and fulfill all your promises. Some children lie, take things from home or others, and are self-centered without considering other people's feelings. Such educational ideas and methods are worrying. . Therefore, parents should pay full attention to the cultivation of moral habits.
2, life silently destroys people, just like dripping water wears away stones; Similarly, life makes people silent. Only by paying attention to the details and progress of life and becoming the master of life can we be achieved by life. The new educational experiment has a slogan:? State is greater than method, and method is greater than effort. ? Reality is just the opposite, right? Effort is greater than method, and method is greater than state? . In fact, the biggest gap between people is the state. With the state, there is a method. If you are in a state and you want to do something, you may succeed.
Fourth, return childhood to children.
People often think that children nowadays have no childhood and no happiness. As long as you enter school, you will have no good life. Before entering kindergarten, parents had many dreams to let their children play the piano, draw pictures, sing and dance? As soon as they entered the school and entered the examination circle, many parents quit the previous game. Of course, learning is not to give children happiness, but to place a lot of illusions. Gradually, the reality shattered their dreams, and by junior high school, those beautiful fantasy hobbies were cut off. What's left? Bitter? . As the children say: I get up the earliest, go to bed the latest, suffer the most, and be the most tired. Me, me, me or me. ? Yes, it is children who rush to the road before dawn every morning, and it is children (and maybe mahjong players) who turn off the lights at the latest every night. Today's children are really more bitter than farmers! They didn't enjoy the happiness they deserved!
Happiness is an experience, and enjoying the happiness of education is a realm of education. Ask the child if he is happy. The answer is: no! Is it okay? Learning from time to time is a pleasure! ? Learning should be interesting. Why can't children learn in games, activities and play? Why is learning locked in the study? Our parents should pay attention to their children's psychological happiness index!