Educational skills of children with different personalities
Parents are eager for their children's healthy growth and success. So when educating children, how can we grasp their personality advantages and cultivate them correctly? Children with different personalities should adopt different educational methods.
Children have formed a character when they are young, which may be introverted or extroverted. Character can determine fate. Personality plays a role in children from an early age, and it runs through their life, which determines their way of thinking and behavior. There is a passage in the bible: a child should be raised according to the way he should go, so that he will not deviate from his nature when he grows up. Generally speaking, everyone should follow the same path. For example, we all want our children to be excellent, kind and brave in school. These general directions are the same, but you will find that they live in different families, have different personalities, receive different education and take different paths. So "to raise a child according to the way he should go", then what should he go? One of the most important factors is personality. Personality determines to some extent what a person should do and what he is most suitable for. There is another sentence in the Bible, which is written for parents: Please adjust the way you raise your child, so that he can adapt to the child's natural development mode, so that he will not deviate from his natural life mode when he matures. The most important part of this natural life mode refers to the unchangeable part of personality factors.
The first point: In the face of children with blue personality (introverted personality), parents should be bold.
Children are seeking perfection, and parents should not be too perfect; Children are thin lines, and parents should be thick lines. Be bold with this blue child, because she is too meticulous, and she pays too much attention to details. At the same time, it is precisely because she pays too much attention to details that she can't see the overall situation. It looks like a big building as a whole, but she has to be careful about the details. We still have to say that it is good to be meticulous and earnest, but if the advantages go too far, they will become shortcomings. Therefore, the first thing to pay attention to is that if the child is fine, you should be thick. Let's imagine what would happen if children and adults were meticulous, pursuing perfection and getting serious? It is likely that both sides are in deep pain and cannot extricate themselves.
Children with blue personalities are very demanding and strict with themselves. They are a very tired person. Parents' high standards for them will aggravate their fatigue. If you are too tired, you will form anxiety. I have been to many schools to give lectures. In primary and secondary schools, I can see that many children blame themselves for not meeting their own standards, feel sad for not meeting their parents' requirements, and feel anxious for not getting good grades. Children with blue personalities are definitely not heartless children. To be sensitive and delicate to blue personality is to treat them with thick lines, to make them more atmospheric, to let them see more people around them, or the outside world, and to try not to give them a chance to walk into a dead end, lest they be more sensitive, more delicate and more serious.
Number two: Never treat them with anger.
Teacher Tingting did a good job and patiently asked her why. Because talking loudly to children with blue personality can easily make them feel criticized. They are thin-skinned, and they may cry if they stare. If you are at home, mom and dad may be anxious: "Why are you crying?" Cry at every turn! Why are you so worthless? Please, why are you crying? ..... "When adults are in a hurry, some hard words will come out sideways from their mouths. Don't treat them with high-profile anger. That's what children with blue personalities do. If you treat them with high-profile anger, they will immediately stop talking or continue to cry, and it is easy to shut themselves up and ignore each other. This is a child. If it is an adolescent child, adults will use such a loud and angry tone. They will close the door immediately and not talk to their parents for days. Moreover, there is absolutely no room for discussion if similar problems occur again in the future. They are very sensitive and know how to protect themselves. If you hurt them once, they will never give you a chance to hurt them again. Tingting is such a child.
So don't treat such children in a loud and angry tone. They are very strong. In fact, children with four personalities, red, yellow, blue and green, are very strong, but they are strong in different ways. So how can a child with blue personality be strong? It's what people often say. It's twisted. They will stick to their opinions silently, unless you can speak their minds immediately, they can be silent for a long time.
The third point: praise children with blue personality.
All children need to be affirmed, especially children with blue personality, but the way of praise is different from that of children with other personalities. For children with yellow personality, we can describe their advantages in front of everyone; Children with red personality always think they are the best, and it is enough to get your approval; Just nod your head to the child with green personality and give him a thumb. It's important to praise children with blue personality gently, not in a big way, because they are shy and thin-skinned. If you can praise the details, that's what blue children like best, because they pay great attention to the details, so they especially want you to see their beautiful details.
For example, Tingting, we can praise her like this: "Your vision is relatively straight, I don't believe you can compare with other children. The window is a little crooked, but it doesn't matter, as long as it can be seen that it is a window. " You should praise such specific details. If you say "good painting" in general, she will think you are perfunctory. Including our adults greeting a teenager: how are you recently? If the other person is a blue child, you will think that you are perfunctory. You must ask for very specific details, which is what blue people want. To pay attention to children's thoughts, you must cater to their needs.
The fourth point: guide children with blue personality to express themselves.
Children with blue personality can express themselves well. They don't talk as quickly as extroverted children, nor do they talk as little as young children. They are not very active, so it doesn't matter if they don't express themselves. Tingting with blue personality is like this. She is introverted and usually reluctant to express herself. It was not until she was crying there that the teacher found out and asked her, and she began to express it. If the child is extroverted, he would have raised his hand high, or called the teacher loudly, or simply ran to find the teacher. For such a subtle blue child, adults sometimes worry: just keep silent, or cry by themselves, unwilling to take the initiative to share something with adults. What if something really happens? Faced with such a situation, some adults don't understand, so they rush to give instructions: "What are you crying for? You are talking! " In fact, this is the child's character, which needs us to understand and observe. After understanding, we will not be easily upset, but also take care of them and approach them actively and patiently. Children with blue personality have one characteristic. If adults give them a great sense of security, they are also willing to show themselves. Their expression level is fine, but they can hold their breath.
Communication is a habit, and habits are cultivated. For introverted children, we should pay more attention to talking to them from an early age, give them more opportunities to talk, encourage them to participate in class collective activities, participate in class cadre elections, participate in speech training classes, and so on. Some parents don't know this, so they sign up for physical education classes and musical instrument classes for children with blue personality. The content of these classes is much more practiced and less spoken, which is not conducive to children's language development needs. Often children have made great achievements in these skills, but they can't express themselves. Adults should realize this, make up for this shortcoming, and pay more attention to their own language expression.
Fifth point: don't rush a blue child to make a decision.
Introverts are very passive. For a child like Tingting, her pace will be a little slower, so if she wants to make a decision, she must think clearly, completely and perfectly before she will say it. In the process of helping her solve the problem, no matter how anxious you are, no matter what you say, no matter how long you talk, she won't make a decision until she is really convinced. Her "twist" is also shown here. So you'd better not rush her, because it's no use rushing her, she won't cooperate. Tingting is not satisfied with her work and is already crying. The teacher's first reaction was that the child interrupted the teaching order. What should she do? A child with a blue personality can ignore these things. If she can't solve them well, she will keep crying, or she will stop until she figures it out for herself. Finally, I showed her the works of other children. In those works, the horizon is more uneven and the windows are more irregular, but it can still be seen that it is a tall building. So she immediately knew that she was not bad and made a decision for herself in an instant: I see, don't cry. So he turned and skipped away.
How many parents have devoted their lives to the growth of their children, but the results are not great, mainly because they don't know enough about their children. Understanding personality is to enable us to educate our thoughts.