Overcoming the anxiety of separation and children entering kindergarten from their parents is a very important milestone. It usually brings great excitement and happiness, but there are also many tears and uncertainties-children are like this, and so are parents. "The main reason why children have separation anxiety is that they don't know what will happen in kindergarten." Green, an early education expert, said, "Before that, children spent three years learning the rules and procedures of family life, and they were completely unfamiliar with the new rules that kindergarten would encounter. For parents, the main concern is whether their children will feel abandoned. "

The following methods will help you get through the anxiety of separation smoothly, and let us take a brand-new adventure with our children-separation and being together!

First of all, give children a chance to face it.

Many mothers immediately decided to take their children out of the classroom when they saw that their children's first reaction to kindergarten was not good. But this is a bad idea. "This inadvertently takes back the opportunity to teach children how to solve problems in negative emotions, and children will think that they don't have to face problems." Green said. On the contrary, consistency is very important in kindergarten education. Simply following the basic rules will cultivate children's clear expectations of the consequences. Say goodbye briefly, and the child will know what will happen, but don't go back step by step and drag your feet. When you pick him up after school, stress again that "Mom will be back"-just like you said in the morning. In this way, children will understand that going to school does not mean being separated from their mothers.

Second, let teachers participate.

Usually, ideally, children will meet a warm, caring, experienced teacher who can foresee their needs. But because you are not familiar with each other, a simple introduction is necessary to help her understand the child better. "Knowing as much as possible about children's life at home is very helpful for children to adapt to kindergarten life smoothly." Teacher Green said. "Knowing their diet, sleep and toilet habits is as important as knowing what colors they like, what songs they like to sing and what games they like to play. If parents are willing to tell us what they should do to calm their children down when they feel depressed and anxious at home, that would be great, or we can apply these methods to the classroom. "

You must also tell the teacher about the child's medical problems, such as what food he is allergic to.

Third, prepare a pacifier.

Bringing a soothing object from home to kindergarten can effectively alleviate the separation anxiety of children who have just entered the park. For example, a child's favorite doll or a small blanket, or even a beloved book and a straw cup with his favorite drink. "There was once a child who was very anxious when he first entered kindergarten. He cries for a long time at school every day. So I encouraged him to bring some favorite toys or photos of his family from home. " Green said, "Guess what? The next day he brought a whole bag of toys! "

These gadgets may not be a big deal to you, but they can give children a real sense of security in a strange environment. Glen told us: "Parents always think that their children have already gone to kindergarten, and they should not bring quilts to school. However, children feel that when they go to kindergarten (even if there are no children who are anxious about separation) or when their families change (such as having a younger brother and sister at home, moving, or their parents changing jobs), they especially need the comfort of little things they are familiar with and like. "

Third, avoid comparing with other children.

Don't blame the child, and don't say, "Look, Nolan didn't cry when his mother left."

"The best way for children to adapt to kindergarten is to respect their emotions and this process." Green said. Don't worry, your child will eventually get through the separation anxiety period. Children cry because of separation in order to fully express their feelings. It is no problem to leave while they are still crying. A complete and successful adaptation period may take a month or even months.

It is worth noting that when you take your children on vacation, or go back to school on vacation, or something happens at home, separation anxiety may come back. "However, in my many years of teaching career, there is not a child who can't overcome the anxiety of separation." Teacher Green said.

Fourth, hold back from visiting.

Once you leave kindergarten, tell yourself not to go back to see him, and don't call the school every hour to ask about your child. Dr Walfish said: "It is very important to establish effective communication with teachers. When you believe that your children can be taken good care of even when you are away, you won't be nervous anymore. " Believe in the teacher, believe in yourself, believe that you have chosen the best kindergarten for your children, and please believe in your children.

Fifth, cheer yourself up.

Think of a slogan, such as "this is the best place" or "this is the right decision", and repeat it often when necessary to remind yourself why you are separated from your children and the benefits of separation. Your emotions will infect your child, so if you are nervous and anxious when you carry your child out of the car, then he will be like you. Your child will feel your emotions and influence him for some time to come. So stay calm and optimistic, even if you are not 100% happy. "Give your child confidence: you will pick him up as soon as school is over, and the kindergarten teacher will make him safe and happy."

Children will have separation anxiety, and so will parents. Therefore, to overcome children's separation anxiety, parents must first overcome separation anxiety. Children are not as fragile as they think. Let go when it's time to let go.

The four self-help methods of mental anxiety disorder are mainly psychotherapy, and the self-help methods of mental anxiety disorder can play a very good role in relieving symptoms for mild patients. So, what are the main self-help methods for mental anxiety disorder?

Four ways to save yourself from mental anxiety.

Four ways to save yourself from mental anxiety;

First, relax yourself.

Just to get rid of nervousness. For example, if you feel a little better, imagine all possible dangerous scenes and let the weakest ones appear first. And repeat it, you will gradually think of any dangerous situation or the whole process will no longer experience anxiety. At this point, it ended.

Second, divert attention.

If the work in front of you makes you upset and nervous, you can temporarily divert your attention, turn your eyes out of the window, and let your eyes and other parts of your body relax in time, thus temporarily relieving the immediate pressure. You can even get up and walk to avoid the low-tide working atmosphere for a while.

Third, get enough sleep.

More rest and adequate sleep are good ways to relieve anxiety, but this may not be easy to do, because tension often makes it difficult to sleep. But the less you sleep, the more nervous you will be and the more likely you will get sick, because the immune system has weakened at this time.

Fourth, fantasy

This is a good way to relieve tension and anxiety. Imagine yourself lying on a sunny beach with a cool sea breeze blowing slowly. Try it, it may have unexpected effects.

If you are in a bad state, then use the above four methods of mental anxiety to relieve your symptoms!

Interpersonal anxiety feels stupid. Everyone's knowledge is limited. In the process of interpersonal communication, many people are often ignored because of knowledge problems, forming their own stupid ideas and causing interpersonal anxiety.

Everyone's knowledge in life is limited, and there is always something he doesn't understand. In the process of interpersonal communication, if others are talking about knowledge they don't understand, some people will feel embarrassed, anxious and even inferior, and think they are too ignorant, which forms the so-called interpersonal anxiety.

"A few days ago, I attended the opening ceremony of an art festival with my friends. An artist came to us, and he and my friend began to talk about painting. I feel completely left out and I can't understand anything. I only listen to giggles. " Dai Hua, who works in a foreign company, said with emotion.

Most of us have had the same experience as wearing flowers, sometimes we forget them in the blink of an eye, and sometimes we laugh when we think about them afterwards. But Dai Hua will draw a conclusion from it: he feels uneducated, his vision is too narrow, and he feels stupid.

Psychotherapist Catherine Aimelet-Perisol said: "People who think they are stupid are actually real. "This kind of emotion shows that they have deviated from the person they think they should be." It is this gap that makes them feel as if they have deviated from the theme. In fact, what they feel is a deviation from themselves.

Interpersonal communication anxiety

Psychoanalyst GerardMacqueron believes that interpersonal anxiety is the main reason for the deviation between ideal state and reality state. "Whenever interacting with others, people with interpersonal anxiety will have some dramatic physical signs, such as poor breathing, blushing and trembling. They are ashamed of this, because the appearance of these characteristics betrayed them. For a while, they began to reflect on themselves. " They are not good at joining other people's conversations. With these ideological burdens, they are even more at a loss. "I'm so useless" "I have to say something" "I'm so stupid" ... "Whenever they are alone afterwards, they are always troubled by regrets and constantly judge themselves." Gilad Macron added. This strange circle is formed because they are too hard on themselves. And all this is often inseparable from childhood experience: always being asked to be the first by people around you, or often belittling themselves, which will make these people accustomed to only thinking about how to leave a good impression on each other when interacting with others.

Psychologist VicentdeGaule thinks that "social complex" is the problem, "especially those who don't agree with their social roles and are not confident". For example, bitter monks and people from humble origins often do this. Whenever these people enter the society or face some intellectuals with superiority, they will always struggle with some complex: "The gap of objective social identity will lead to their spiritual inferiority, because they often internalize the negative image of themselves reflected by others and hold it in their hearts." Vincent de Gaulle Jacques said:

Lack of empathy

However, you don't have to have the same social class and hobbies to communicate harmoniously with others. "The most important thing is to understand empathy." Gilad Macron said firmly. Some people feel left out because they don't know how to listen and share other people's feelings. This lack of empathy "may be that their needs were not taken seriously in childhood, so they didn't learn how to share others' feelings." The analyst explained: "If children are not the focus of parents' attention, their feelings will not be ignored." How can I feel less stupid? This requires them to be less critical of themselves, take care of others' feelings, show their true side and accept that they are different from their expectations.

Please be the master of anxiety, not the slave. Oh, no! This air conditioning noise doesn't sound right ... should I get someone to repair it? ..... I may not be able to pay this month's expenses ... I have to take money from the fund ... but the market is not very good recently ... or is it more reliable to deposit it in the bank? ..... this air conditioning noise doesn't sound right. ...

This is a circular inner play around a small detail. Worry about this for a while, worry about that for a while, and finally return to the original worry. This is a typical manifestation of anxiety.

What is anxiety? Is it a disease? What effect will such anxiety have on our work? Looking at previous research reports, we can see some clues. As for anxiety, if we don't control it, we will be at its mercy.

There are two manifestations of anxiety: one is cognitive or worrying thoughts; The other is the physical level, that is, the physiological symptoms of anxiety, such as sweating, rapid heartbeat or muscle tension.

In a sense, anxiety is an excessive self-protection awareness of unknown risks. It is a preview of possible bad things and coping strategies.

Anxiety, to some extent, will have a great negative impact on work.

After several anxious experiences, anxious people will find that 99% of what they are worried about has not happened, and what happened is not as serious and beautiful as expected.

People who are prone to anxiety are potentially more anxious. Extreme people are usually extremely sensitive to details, which leads to their emotional fragility and even a tendency to be bullied and persecuted. Such employees are easily frustrated and angry. If they encounter some difficulties or challenges in their work, they are likely to lack optimism.

As colleagues, in the process of getting along with colleagues, they may always think that others are hostile and misunderstand their unintentional comments.

If "anxious patients" are * * *, they are likely to doubt the loyalty of employees and be occupied by some undisclosed internal news or complicated interpersonal relationships.

In the face of criticism, their typical reactions are anxiety, worry and over-sensitivity, which makes them unable to cope properly in the crisis.

However, the anxiety-prone characteristics also give them typical advantages that others do not have.

It is the extreme sensitivity of anxious people that makes them easily feel subtle differences. As Mencius said, "born in sorrow and died in happiness", they will find things that others may ignore or cover up, and they can perceive fear and danger.

They will also avoid superficiality and make very accurate judgments about people. At the same time, when problems arise, you are always ready to take responsibility, and you can reserve enough time before accepting new challenges.

Although anxiety will have a certain positive effect, it is also very important to control your anxiety factors and prevent them from over-expanding, so as to become "anxious patients".

Borkovic, a researcher, also put forward some methods to control anxiety:

First of all, self-awareness: stifle the signs of anxiety in the cradle and learn to relax.

Try to control anxiety as soon as it appears. The ideal time is when the imagination of disaster triggers an "anxiety cycle". You also need to find the real internal cause of anxious thoughts.

In addition, people can learn relaxation methods and use them after they realize their anxiety.

The second is questioning and criticizing: take a critical position on anxious thoughts and question the possibility of their occurrence.

It is not enough to realize anxiety. Anxiety patients also need to actively question their worried thoughts. If they can't do this, the anxiety cycle will come back. Therefore, the second step is to take a critical position on these views:

Is it really possible for terrible things to happen? There must be only one way or even no way to stop it? What constructive measures can be taken? Is it really useful to worry all the time?

At the same time, actively relax and prevent the emotional brain from sending anxiety signals to the whole body.

The third is to turn to medicine: to deal with worrying ideas.

For people who are overly anxious and develop into morbid fears and delusions, it is wise to turn to medicine to break the anxiety cycle-this is actually a signal of self-awareness.

In fact, anxiety is more conscious and recognizable than depression, depression or compulsion. Anxiety can play an important role in some special moments, but don't let it become the overlord in your life and work.

A small door to overcome psychological anxiety Nowadays, the fast-paced life has made many people feel that their psychological pressure is too great, and various psychological problems emerge one after another. Anxiety has become a common psychological disease of modern people. Anxiety disorder will have adverse effects on both psychology and physiology. Besides medication, there are other ways to overcome psychological anxiety. Let me introduce you to some tips for overcoming psychological anxiety.

1, adaptation method.

Facing people with anxiety bravely is the best way to overcome anxiety. Anxious people break down a fearful situation into several small goals step by step, and then they can gradually adapt to this situation and stop worrying about it in the future.

Step 2 stay optimistic

When you lack self-confidence, you might as well imagine your past brilliant achievements or your own success. You will quickly resolve your anxiety and anxiety and restore your self-confidence.

3, breathing relaxation method

If you feel anxious, a simple way to calm yourself down is to pay attention to the regularity of your breathing. When we feel nervous, we inhale faster than exhale. So in order to calm us down, we need to reverse this situation.

Watch your breath. Try to breathe once every five seconds, once every five seconds. Don't worry about your counting speed, keep a steady speed of five seconds in and five seconds out. Now extend your exhalation time by two seconds. Don't push. Keep a gentle breathing rhythm. As your exhalation becomes longer and longer, your relaxation response will begin to take over. The only thing that can get you out of all this is your mind and imagination. The more contact you have, the more you feel that you can control your anxiety again.

4. Imagination method

Imagination is a very useful tool, which can calm the mind and reduce anxiety and tension. A simple imagination exercise can make your brain imagine a "special place", a place where you can feel safe and leave your fear. I used to use this method whenever I felt pain when I went to the dentist. I can tell you that it helped me through those difficulties. )

First, close your eyes and take your thoughts to an imaginary place where you feel safe and happy. It can be a tropical beach, grassland, forest, or even your bed. It all depends on your imagination. Make a vivid imagination and think about what you see, hear, feel and smell. Use your feelings to guide you into a calm state. Stay in this calm place until your breathing becomes more normal and your mind becomes more calm. When you feel ready, open your eyes and take a deep breath.

What method can effectively overcome psychological anxiety? Try these four tips, I believe they can help you overcome your anxiety.

How to eliminate anxiety before exams? 1. Be swayed by considerations of gain and loss

This is a very common mentality in the sprint stage, which is always "Can I get in?" What if I can't pass the exam? "This kind of problem bothers me and I can't help thinking about it every day. Think before going to bed and still think after waking up. Depression, loss of confidence and rising pessimism directly affect normal review. The fundamental reason is that exams are too utilitarian and pay too much attention to results. Take MBA as the only way out, or waste time and energy if you fail the exam. I'm sorry for always supporting my family, so you must, must, must pass the exam.

The right medicine: start with the mentality-avoid the result and lower the expectation. There are thousands of roads to success, and applying for an MBA is just one of them.

2. Bored and tired

This is also a common psychological fluctuation. The performance is: every day, whether physically or psychologically, I am very tired and haggard. Picking up a book makes you tired, and reading a book makes you tired. A thick pile of books can't wait to burn. The main reason is that the process of preparing for the exam is too vast, ranging from half a year to several months to one or two years. Students make up their minds to review, face textbooks every day, and go round and round. As the saying goes, "I'm tired of watching it." It is normal to feel disgusted, rejected and bored after persisting for so long, but it is also dangerous and undesirable. Everyone else is full of energy. Go ahead. If you fall behind, the consequences will be unimaginable.

Suit the remedy to the case: once you are in this mood, I suggest you put down your books, go outside, find a suburb or seaside place, calm down and think about why you chose to apply for the exam in the first place. What does it mean to yourself? To what extent did you self-examine yourself today? Relax and reflect. In addition, you can play sports, basketball, football, running and shopping. Use various ways to refresh and drive excitement. Come back to read and move on after being excited.

3. Nervous and stressed

For the sprint stage, a little tension and pressure is necessary, but you must not be numb and stagnant because of excessive tension. Some students suffer from persistent insomnia and loss of appetite due to nervousness and excessive pressure. The whole person is pessimistic, disappointed and in a trance. What I think during the day and night is "how much math is not good", and the pressure is naturally getting bigger and bigger. The main reason for this problem is "taking the exam too seriously" and worrying about failure. I always feel that my review is very poor, and there is a big gap with my opponent, so I have no chance to be admitted.

The right medicine: In fact, this idea is common to normal people. Everyone is used to seeing only the advantages and disadvantages of others, and always feels inferior to others. But at the same time, others will think that you are better at reading and reviewing than him. You should know that the progress of others' review is not necessarily better than yours. The follow-up time is very important and will have a substantial impact on the outcome. The key is to see if you can stick to it now. You should have confidence, affirm your previous efforts, and affirm that your efforts will always pay off. In addition, you can chat with friends to express your worries and worries, and your nervousness will be reduced accordingly.

4. worry, fear, fear

Anxiety, fear and fear caused by tension and pressure are also a negative emotion that puzzles many sprint candidates. Some students are worried and vulnerable. The fundamental reason is that we attach too much importance to exams and have too little self-confidence. Roosevelt said, "Our only fear is fear itself." The result of the exam is nothing to be afraid of, and neither is your competitor. Accept the true self in an all-round way, don't always think about comparing with others, think about the progress of others and your own model test results. Always think about this, then you won't live your own life, you are a slave to other people's lives.

Suit the remedy to the case: People who can really survive can only keep up with themselves and surpass themselves, because your goal every day is to become more mature and capable. In addition, to see your past success, to see your own success, you should always review the road you have traveled and see your every progress in the review. Look at your own growth by comparing your own development process. Instead of letting past mistakes haunt you.

Give up yourself

This is the most extreme consequence of various emotional fluctuations. I worked hard to prepare for half a year and was destroyed in one thought. Many students complain that the MBA exam is too difficult and torturous to persist. In fact, it is not only a result, but also a process of cultivation. The process of preparing for the exam, the test of people, self-cultivation, efficient handling of problems and low-key handling of problems and setbacks are unique. In this process, you will meet many comrades-in-arms and friends, share your learning experience, and you will grow up slowly.

The right medicine: the result of persistence is not necessarily victory, and giving up definitely means failure. MBA exam winners are not necessarily the best, but they are definitely the most persistent. Once the idea of giving up flashes, watch Forrest Gump, Soldiers Assault and Antarctic Adventure. "Don't give up, don't give up", "Look for hope in despair, and life will eventually be brilliant."

In the final stage, you may feel that time is pressing and study hard. After all, this is one of the few times in life when you devote yourself wholeheartedly to a goal. But we must adjust our mentality, relax and keep ourselves healthy and energetic.

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