Should children fight if they don't listen?
It is not recommended to hit children. In the education of children, whether to fight or not has always been the most controversial. Parents need to grasp the "degree" when educating their children, don't praise them too much, and don't beat them at all. What I say here depends. There are many ways to educate children, which can solve their problems. Why in this way? It's not that children can't fight, but it's not recommended, because parents educate their children for their own good, but beating their children can't educate them well and won't do them any good, so why fight?
Therefore, parents should understand that children have problems. The first thing to do is how to solve their problems and how to guide them to make changes instead of hitting them. Beating them won't solve the problem.
What are the consequences of hitting children?
1, change the child's heart
A slight mistake will lead to a beating, which will make children more careful. At the same time, some children will become obedient to their parents, have no opinions and lack opinions.
2. Love to lie
Some children may become liars in order to avoid being beaten and please their parents, which I believe no parents want to see.
Violence has become the only way for children to solve problems.
Because of the indiscriminate beating of parents, children have also learned this method of fighting violence with violence. When they have an affair in the future, they know that the only way is to raise their fists.
4. Make children unwilling to trust their parents.
Because children are often beaten inside, they often have distrust of their parents, which will also make them feel lonely and helpless, especially when they are bullied outside and don't know who to talk to. Parent-child relationship may also be alienated.
How can children be educated if they don't obey?
First, respect all the feelings of children.
Parents should listen quietly and attentively, but don't judge. Parents can not accept their children's disobedience, but they must accept and respect their feelings.
Tell your child what you hear and what you think.
From time to time, summarize, restate or retell the key contents of what the child said, including his feelings and the situational reasons that led to this feeling. It is not enough just to listen and understand. Parents must also respond to what he says, thinks and feels in words. But try not to repeat the child's words word for word, and express the same meaning in similar language.
Third, empathy
Sometimes children do things incorrectly, and adults will stop them, which will make children lose their temper. In fact, parents need to think from the perspective of their children. The children didn't know that their method wouldn't work until they tried. Therefore, children can experience it properly without danger. He has tried and hit a wall, and then he will be more understanding and willing to accept it.
Fourth, help children analyze.
When a child does something wrong, what parents should do is not to blame the child, but to understand the child, patiently ask him why he did it, help him analyze the consequences, let him realize the seriousness, learn how to solve such problems in the future, and adjust his emotions.