It turns out that the wife is sexually apathetic, which means that women lose interest in sex life and even produce indifference and disgust. This is a typical sexual dysfunction.
People's sexual response is controlled by thinking activities, and all kinds of negative emotions such as inhibition, self-blame, anxiety and fear can inhibit the emergence of orgasm through the influence of cerebral cortex on the central nervous system and hypothalamus-pituitary gonad axis. The reasons for this situation generally come from two aspects: ① The patient has some diseases, such as ovarian insufficiency, or dysfunction of endocrine glands such as adrenal cortex and pituitary gland. ② It is caused by psychological factors such as inhibition, fear and sexual disharmony. Generally speaking, women produce sexual pleasure and orgasm more slowly than men. If the man can't adapt to the physiological characteristics of women, it will lead to long-term unsatisfactory sexual life, and some even cause abdominal tension, pelvic muscle spasm and vaginal spasm during sexual intercourse. This is not only the result of frigidity, but also the reason that causes or aggravates frigidity.
According to medical research and analysis, the vast majority of female frigidity is caused by mental (psychological) factors.
So first of all, let go of the burden on your back and build confidence. A large number of survey data at home and abroad prove that female frigidity decreases year by year with the increase of marriage age, and the sexual life between husband and wife will become more harmonious.
Secondly, coordinate the feelings of husband and wife. Because there is no love, marriage or disharmony in marriage, there will be no pleasure in sex. In the family, the wife is not a vassal of the husband. Only with more care and consideration can she gradually forget her unfortunate past and stop expressing her dissatisfaction in words. I can often walk, travel and watch movies with her. Make more efforts in housework, give more encouragement in spirit, and constantly give her psychological comfort. When there are different opinions in life, we should adopt the attitude of seeking common ground while reserving differences and being tolerant and generous, so as to alleviate and solve contradictions.
Third, the two sides need to cooperate closely, make more preparations before sexual intercourse, and have sexual intercourse when the wife has sexual desire, which also contributes to the transformation of sexual apathy. When a wife temporarily doesn't want to share a room because of physical or psychological factors, don't force her to have sex just to satisfy her sexual desire, which will make her more disgusted and disgusted with sex life.
Second, how does the husband treat his frigid wife?
It should be said that frigidity is a situation that both men and women will encounter, but statistics tell us that women are more and heavier than men. According to a survey data, 26% of married women suffer from different degrees of frigidity. Therefore, as a husband, we should pay special attention to whether the spouse is frigid and learn how to treat a frigid wife.
The decline of estrogen has always been regarded by many people as the "killer" of the decline of sexual desire of middle-aged women. However, according to Reuters165438+1October 9th, the research published in the latest issue of Sexology Research shows that the decline of middle-aged women's sexual desire is directly related to their dissatisfaction with their own image.
Dr Patricia Barcelot Koch, associate professor of women's studies at Pennsylvania State University, spent 65,438+00 years in this research, and followed up 307 women aged 35-55. Among them, 2 1% menopause came early, 63.5% had premonition of menopause, and 15.5% menopause. However, menopause did not reduce their sexual satisfaction. 72% people even think that every time they have sex, they are basically satisfied. In order to delay the loss of sexual enthusiasm of these women, the effect of drug delaying menopause therapy is not obvious.
But in general, these women who are close to middle age or have entered middle age have little sex life, which is related to their lack of charm and courage to have sex.
Among the women surveyed, about 2 1% think that they are useless in sexual charm, and they dislike their protruding bellies, bellies, hips, thighs and calves the least. This lack of self-confidence in body shape has made two-thirds of women have no desire for sex since 10, and the number of sex has decreased.
In fact, whether the wife is frigid can be detected on the wedding night. Generally speaking, lovers begin to talk about marriage. Of course, they will come to two of a kind. This is a natural stage, and there will definitely be a love season. If a girlfriend is sexually apathetic for a long time, it will always show up in the usual communication process, such as fear of hugging, kissing and other intimate behaviors, and it is difficult to persist in the whole process of love at the wedding stage. If a frigid woman persists until the wedding night, the first contact in sexual life will make the husband feel discordant and unhappy, because the wife may show a shrinking and very reluctant attitude. At this time, the husband must not take rude actions, but patiently caress her and make her gradually enter a state of sexual excitement as much as possible. If the husband has sexual intercourse reluctantly and rudely, the psychological and physical trauma they bring to their wife on their first night of marriage will make the latent sexual apathy obvious and serious, which may be unexpected by the husband who loves her deeply.
On the wedding night, the husband's suspicion, dissatisfaction, cursing and even beating can only make the situation worse and worse. Never do it! As a loving wife, a husband should do his job well both physically and psychologically. Physiologically speaking, because the first night of marriage has caused certain trauma to his wife, he needs to rest for a few days and wait for his wife's local trauma to heal gradually.
Psychologically speaking, a husband should be psychologically prepared and do long-term, patient and meticulous work for his wife. First of all, we should continue to cultivate the feelings when we are in love, and urge our wives to open their hearts under the scorching love and meticulous care, and talk about the causes and development process of sexual apathy. If the wife can tell the story of sexual assault or even rape in her early years with tears; If the wife can explain that she received incorrect sex education when she was young or was afraid of pregnancy and childbirth; If the wife can tell her feelings of disgust or fear of men, it can be said that she has succeeded half way, because the next step can be treated according to the reasons.
After getting the first-hand information of his wife's frigidity, the husband should treat his wife with a very sympathetic and understanding attitude, and never stimulate each other with contempt and disgust, otherwise it will definitely lead to the aggravation of frigidity. A husband who truly loves his wife should melt the ice in his wife's heart with ardent love, block and drive away the shadow hanging over his wife's heart with his broad chest and powerful arms, and let her feel that there is a reliable, caring and powerful patron saint around her, and she will have dependence, trust and gratitude for her husband. She will feel that living with such a man is a kind of happiness, so that she will gradually have sexual requirements and desires.
In daily life, the husband should do more caressing actions, even the layout of the bedroom, the color of bedding, and the coordination of sound and light should be beneficial to both parties' sexual lives. It is necessary to avoid taking sexual postures and behaviors that his wife hates, choose his favorite way of craving, and use some lubricants appropriately to make sexual life more relaxed and comfortable. Pay attention to some sexual skills and try to make your wife's sexiness reach its peak.
If after all these efforts, my wife's condition still can't get better, we should accompany her to the hospital for a check-up to see what's wrong with her body. Check liver function, renal function, thyroid function, erythrocyte sedimentation rate and head CT. , especially gynecological examination, find problems and treat them in time.
Sexual apathy rarely lasts forever. If the husband can understand, care and love his wife physically and psychologically, then it is just around the corner that sexual apathy will turn into sexual excitement. Of course, it is also important to consult a psychologist when necessary. Psychologists will guide husband and wife how to cooperate and coordinate with each other, so that both sides can gradually overcome the family troubles caused by sexual apathy.