With what? Don't stop touching in public.
In front of the older generation, don't stop their love, and don't teach the children face to face. Communicate with children privately, clarify which behaviors are not allowed, and close the door to guide if there are mistakes. If children make mistakes because of the protection of their ancestors, the punishment will be more severe. But rest assured, this is by no means out of anger.
Use your eyes to signal that rewards and punishments are clear.
When a child intentionally makes a mistake because of the existence of his ancestors, make a gesture with his eyes. If he still doesn't converge, point it out clearly. When rewards and punishments are clear, children will behave themselves. Simple punishments, such as restricting watching TV, eating snacks or traveling, are all effective methods.
With what? Love, in no particular order
The older generation usually loves their first grandson or granddaughter more, but please rest assured that they will also love their second child.
Learn to integrate into the family.
Small quarrels at home may seem trivial, but they may have a huge impact when accumulated. As a new family member, it is the key to learn not to care, to adapt and to integrate. If you find it hard to accept, you might as well divert your attention, learn to arrange flowers and cook, and concentrate on taking care of your children and husband.
In the left ear and out the right ear.
In life, sometimes it is necessary to go in one ear and out the other, and turn a blind eye. When the mouth is sweet, things get smaller. Everything is for the harmony and happiness of the family! If you find it difficult, you can consider other solutions: moving out, changing the way of education, adjusting your mentality or trying to change your mother-in-law's opinion. I hope these suggestions can give you inspiration, and may your family be full of love and harmony!