Dazhen Kampo: How can I make my family believe in Buddhism?
Q: My mother and wife both believe in Buddhism. How can I influence my father to believe in Buddhism?
Dazhen Kampo A: It mainly depends on your own progress in practice. In front of him, you should behave well and leave a good impression on him. Many disciples who practice great perfection have changed a lot at home. Nowadays, many people come to switch from one family to another and bring their families into action. This is the real practice, which can show that your practice has made progress. The progress of spiritual practice does not depend on how many times you read the sutra, how many times you read the mantra, how long you can meditate and how much homework you can do, but on the changes of people around you. They used to oppose you, but now they all support you; I used to slander casually, but now I don't slander, but I'm learning it myself. All these can explain your spiritual progress.
Dazhen Kampo: Regard home as Buddha
At present, many Buddhists do not have correct understanding and opinions, and always can't handle the relationship with family, life and practice well. This is a particularly big and serious problem. Many people say, "I am good to outsiders and not good to my family." When you can't be kind to your family, you have no sympathy at all. You can't even measure the beings closest to you, the beings who know you best, and the beings who can contact you directly. Do you want to measure other beings? It is out of the question.
Some practitioners shut themselves up in Buddhist temples all day, chanting scriptures, offering incense, kowtowing, not doing housework and taking care of their families, which has caused them so much trouble. As a result, their house is noisy all day. This is not a good thing, it is a bad thing! Buddhism benefits all beings, but Buddhism does not harm all beings! You have violated the present Buddhism, and you have violated the requirements of the Buddha. These people in the family are all sentient beings! When they need your care and attention, you leave them alone. Isn't this the loss of all beings? To lose all sentient beings is to lose bodhicitta; To lose all sentient beings is to lose Buddhism. You have harmed all beings, you have annoyed them, and you are creating evil karma! You are a villain! Now you have violated the Buddhism and the three treasures of the guru. Buddhas and bodhisattvas will not bless you, and good gods will not protect you, so they will naturally dislike you. It's no use learning the form again!
Family members don't support you and prevent you from learning Buddhism, which is the biggest obstacle to your practice. You should solve this problem first. How to solve it? If you want them to believe in Buddhism and learn from it, you should give them a good opinion and let them see the benefits and merits of learning Buddhism. This is the simplest and easiest way. If you don't show your dharma properly, your family will certainly not understand you. He doesn't understand Buddhism, but you don't care about him, don't take care of him or understand him more and more. He can't accept it. The more you learn Buddhism, the more disgusted he is. You gave him Jaken, and he vilified Buddhism, and as a result, he planted evil karma. This bad business will mature one day and will definitely hinder you. Now that your family doesn't support you, it's also a fate between you. They interfere with you so much, this is your karma, the biggest karma! This is your evil influence, the biggest demon! You must stop this first. What should we do? There should be no resentment and complaints at this time, otherwise your relationship will be bad and there will be such bad karma. You should get on well with him, and one good turn deserves another, and he will certainly support and help you. Do it! You should adjust your mentality and keep it clean. Then, you sincerely dedicate yourself to him and serve him completely. Your family will also see the benefits and merits of learning Buddhism, and they will also have confidence in Buddhism and plant good roots. At this time, all obstacles will become the help of your practice.
What are the reasons for family disharmony? It must be your own problem. Of course, you didn't completely treat your family as a Buddha and put it on your head. Now this society is all about interests first. Without interests, there will be no feelings, so there will be no good results. I will always think that they are my parents for generations, all sentient beings who need my care and care most, and all of them are Buddhas! It is my responsibility to take care of my parents, so I must care about them and take care of them. This is the best way! Then you really become a bodhisattva. We sincerely care for, take care of and respect our families, and expect nothing in return. Can the family not be moved? Can your family be bad? If you influence him with your heart, his heart will change at that time, and he will sincerely love and respect you. Only when we have sincere feelings for each other can there be real harmony. If you really want to repair family harmony, then do it. A harmonious family is a happy family; A harmonious village is a happy village; A harmonious country is a happy country; The whole world is harmonious, and this world is a happy world. To save all sentient beings, we must start from the sentient beings around us and gradually expand to all parents and sentient beings. This is the most practical and best way.
We are all people who practice the great perfection method, so we should always be aware of the five kinds of perfection. Your home is a paradise in the west; Your husband and wife are boundless buddhas; Your family, relatives and friends are revered by the Lotus Department, brave mothers, dakini, goddesses and goddesses; You cook and do housework at home, which is the great perfection method; The elapsed time is the usual continuation wheel. Where is the paradise in the west except where you are? Clean heart, clean soil. You don't have to leave your home to go to the western paradise. Take good care of your family. If you take care of them, you will help all life. If you respect them, you will respect the Buddha.
Dazhen Kampo: If you do this, your family will definitely support you to learn Buddhism.
Learning Buddhism is not for suffering, nor for worry. We should learn Buddhism and practice. The more we practice, the happier our life will be and the more harmonious our family will be. Because if you practice, you will have wisdom, do things and treat others.
However, many people who study Buddhism abandon their families and even quarrel with them because their families don't believe in Buddhism, don't study Buddhism and oppose themselves. This is hurting all beings! Only those who have good fortune, foundation and fate can enter Buddhism and learn Buddhism, otherwise it is impossible. Family members don't have the same blessings and wisdom as you. You should pity them, take care of them, and let your family realize the benefits of learning Buddhism.
Your family opposes you, quarrels with you, and your life is a mess. You can't cope with these obstacles for a while, so you are sad and disappointed, and then you want to escape: "It's important to learn Buddhism or yourself, regardless of these." As a result, home is becoming less and less like home, leaving only a lot of trouble in the end, which is very pitiful! Can't learn Buddhism or learn Buddhism, don't know Buddhism or practice. They are all biased.
Just make all beings happy; Making parents happy is filial piety. So no matter when, no matter what method, you can make your family happy; But you should know that this is not for yourself, but for all beings. In the past, they did not listen to their parents, which made them sad and angry. Now they follow their hearts and realize their wishes. They feel that their children have become better, and then they begin to accept Buddhism. I used to be very bad to my lover, but after studying Buddhism, I was very good to him (her), and my home was clean and tidy, and then my lover began to learn Buddhism. This is Purdue sentient beings! If you can influence them slowly, you will become a bodhisattva.
But some people don't understand this truth, so they close the door, chant Buddhist scripture, kowtow, meditate, don't clean up at home, don't cook, and even quarrel with their families. When your family saw it, it wasn't like this when you didn't study Buddhism, and it wasn't as good as before when you studied Buddhism. Can I not object to you? If you hurt all beings in your family when you worship or offer Buddha, the Buddha and Bodhisattva will not bless you, and the good God will not bless you. Because you violated the Buddhism and the teachings of the Sambo Guru. Your family, your husband, your wife and your children all need your care and care, but you ignore them. This is abandoning all beings. To abandon all sentient beings is to abandon bodhicitta and Buddhism. No need to enter the Buddhist temple, burn incense or kowtow. As long as you take good care of your family and make them happy, buddhas and bodhisattvas will naturally be satisfied and good gods will naturally protect you. In this way, you will be happy in this life and the next, and you will always be happy. This should be the result of studying Buddhism and practicing.
Dazhen Kampo: Rao started his life with his family.
When we can truly serve all beings, we can be free; When we can really benefit all beings, we can be free. To care about others unselfishly, to ask for nothing in return, is to forgive all beings.
Rao Yi, a sentient being, can get rid of it, but we should start with our family. To care for them, take care of them, pay for them, and ask for nothing in return. This is practice. Family and people around you are the sentient beings who have the most fate with you, and they are the sentient beings who need you most. We must start with them and then gradually expand the scope. From parents, children, to relatives and friends, to neighbors and colleagues, to a region, a country and even the whole world, and finally to all sentient beings, such a process is needed, and it cannot be done at once.
Let's do a good job of internal relations at home first. Even the sentient beings who know you best can't be measured, and infinite beings can't be measured. The first thing is not done well, can the second thing be done well?
Yoshida Bodhisattva also said in "The Theory of Entering into the Mind" that the scope should be gradually expanded, especially when it is actually done. Start with the sentient beings around you. You can't help sentient beings who have no chance, and you can't think of it. "I am very kind to outsiders, but I can't do it for my family. I have compassion for others, but I can't show compassion for my family. " This shows that you just have no compassion! Those outsiders don't often contact you, don't know you very well, and don't need you particularly, so there is no conflict. Family members are different. We contact each other every day. We know each other too well, too familiar with each other. You are too selfish to get along with. In fact, when you are with your family, it is your true state of mind and true face! I am very happy and peaceful with outsiders. It's all fake. It won't take long.
So start with your family and live a good life. This is an exercise! People around you, your family, these are all sentient beings. When you sacrifice to Buddha, Buddha and Bodhisattva hurt them and make them worry. Can they be happy? It's impossible! To care for them, take care of them, and pay for them unconditionally and without asking for anything in return, they will be moved involuntarily, and will definitely fall in love with you, follow you, learn from you and practice with you. Isn't this a degree? You have no good watch. He knows that if you learn Buddhism like this, you can't even be a good person. Can it still affect you? Can I still follow you? It's impossible!
You have to change yourself. You change yourself, and everything will change. Some people have really changed after learning Buddhism, so the people around them have changed and their fate has changed. Good health, harmonious family, smooth work and good luck. You do good deeds for others completely sincerely, forgive others completely, be unselfish and unselfish, and others will naturally follow you. A pure heart has this power.