-Monkana
Education itself is eighteen martial arts.
The experiments of American psychologists Helok and Ziegler on the effect of praise or criticism show that praise and criticism are beneficial to promoting children's academic performance compared with learning without any response.
In fact, education itself is eighteen kinds of martial arts. There should be rewards, punishments, praise and criticism. However, these methods are a double-edged sword. Good use can help children overcome shortcomings, correct mistakes, make up for deficiencies and make continuous progress; If it is not used well, it will dampen children's enthusiasm, hurt their self-esteem and even arouse their disgust, which is contrary to our original intention.
The following is the praise of Mengkana picture book education summary, criticizing children's scientific way and giving parents reference.
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10 scientific praise method
Sincere praise, trust and expectation have an energy that can make children more positive.
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Praise should be specific:
Accurately describe what the child has done well, and let him know what he has done and how he can be affirmed.
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Praise is more important than process;
Let children know what they have done well in the whole thing, which should be carried forward and which needs improvement.
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Praise should be from the heart:
Don't just say "you are great", choose the right time and occasion to let your children feel your heartfelt recognition.
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Praise is more important than hard work;
When a child makes progress, praise his efforts, not his cleverness, and he will know that he can get good grades through hard work.
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Praise should be interactive:
When praising a child, look at him with warm and surprised eyes, or talk about his previous performance, so that he can feel his progress.
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Praise should be timely:
When a child needs to be affirmed most, a timely praise makes him full of confidence and motivation.
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Praise his attitude:
It is more important to recognize children's attitude of consciously studying, studying hard and actively doing one thing well than just looking at the results.
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Praise his efforts:
Affirm the child's contribution, the child will not be lost because there is no good result, but will work harder.
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Praise its persistence:
Encourage your child to stick to it and don't put too much pressure on him. Parents' approval will stimulate children's perseverance.
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Praise is more important than quality;
Affirm the results of children's efforts, and don't praise children for their quick results.
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Eight scientific methods to criticize children
Criticism is also an important weapon in education. Reasonable criticism helps children to know themselves more comprehensively, form a strong character and cultivate frustration tolerance.
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Let the children explain:
Listen to one side dark, listen to one side bright. You shouldn't listen to one side's accusations, but let the children explain themselves.
Parents remain neutral and objectively evaluate whether the child has done something wrong and why.
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Learn to empathize:
Parents should put themselves in their shoes, understand the purpose of their children's doing so, and find the starting point of criticism.
Let the children put themselves in others' shoes. "Suppose you are that person, how would you feel? Is this right? " .
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First, self-criticism:
Before criticizing children, parents should make self-criticism, lower their posture and quickly narrow the distance with their children.
Parents' self-criticism can also help children learn to reflect on themselves.
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Only for things, not for people:
When a child does something wrong or bad, the parents' first reaction is not to scold, but to guide.
Let the children understand why they can't do this and what the consequences will be.
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Teach children to correct their mistakes:
We should not criticize blindly, but let children realize their mistakes through scientific methods and find ways to correct them.
Giving children another lesson with criticism is the meaning of criticism.
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Choose the right time:
You can't criticize a child before he gets up, goes to bed, eats, or is sick, which will directly affect his physical and mental health.
It's best to sit down and talk to your child calmly. Parents can make demands on their children, and children can also make suggestions to parents.
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Take a friendly attitude:
Criticize and scold children, and parents should not vent their emotions on their children. They should simply point out their mistakes and then educate them.
Don't turn over old scores easily, so that children can resist admitting mistakes and disobeying discipline.
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Respect children's self-esteem:
Don't criticize the child in front of outsiders, let alone beat and scold him in front of classmates and teachers.
Not only adults but also children need to be respected. The child's heart is more fragile and sensitive than we thought.
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10 scientific methods to punish children
Punishment is not only a means of education, but also a subtle art of family education. Only with the wisdom of punishing children can we truly achieve the goal of educating children.
Appropriate punishment for children is also a kind of protection.
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Practice writing:
Writing is a boring learning, but it can make children calm down and reflect on themselves.
When children practice calligraphy and parents are calm, they can communicate calmly.
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Makeup:
When the child dirties the ground, let him take a broom and mop to clean it. If he stays in bed for a long time, let him recite more ancient poems.
Let children learn to be responsible for their actions, which is better than all beatings.
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Side wall thought:
For example, sitting or standing punishment, designate a punishment area at home, let the children sit or stand there, and adjust the time to calculate the punishment time. The function of this punishment is to make children calm down and think about their mistakes. After the punishment, ask the child why he was punished, and let the child know why he made a mistake.
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Change the tone:
Parents directly blame their children, and the children will definitely resist. At this time, they should change their tone. "It's a pity, because you didn't do your homework, you will lose a chance to play with your friends."
When the child realizes that he can play with his friends by doing his homework, he will avoid the unpleasant consequences of not doing his homework next time.
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Help with housework:
You can let children share some housework and let them know that mistakes are responsible. On the one hand, it can let the child know that he has to take responsibility for making mistakes, on the other hand, it also cultivates his good habit of doing housework.
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Suspension of certain rights:
The last thing children like is that they can't do what they like. When children make mistakes, they can ban certain rights. For example, children can temporarily confiscate their mobile phones if they only play mobile phones without doing homework; Children don't like brushing their teeth, being picky about food and littering. And they can temporarily forbid touching children's favorite food and play as punishment.
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Reduce intimacy:
In the process of punishing children, don't hug, touch or chat in a gentle tone.
Let children know that they will lose their parents' care and love after making mistakes, and avoid making mistakes in the future.
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Formulate a family convention:
On the premise of mutual respect, draw up a family convention that parents and children should abide by and stipulate what can and can't be done.
Parents and children should supervise each other and cultivate good habits with family conventions.
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Family members speak the same language:
Parents have different opinions, or grandparents spoil their children, which will greatly reduce the criticism and punishment of children.
Only when family education is persistent can parental discipline play its role.
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Natural consequence method:
If the child has experienced the consequences of doing something wrong, let him bear it himself and don't feel sorry for the child.
When children can learn from this incident, they will naturally learn well.
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Good education, clear rewards and punishments.
Every child makes mistakes. Parents should not turn a blind eye or fly into a rage. Instead, we should use appropriate punishment methods to make children progress and improve when they are punished. This is the purpose of education.
Don't hold the idea that your nature is straightforward. It's too late to behave when the child grows up.
Therefore, under the attitude of appreciation, effective use of praise, criticism, reward and punishment can really help our children grow up healthily.